roundglass Posted February 23, 2008 Share Posted February 23, 2008 My situation is a pretty common one. For a while now, I've been friends with this girl, and we've been pretty tight. We've both talked to each other about basically everything, and I trust her with everything. Recently I'm kind of having feelings for her. The thing is, she's the type of girl who's good looking and that kind of thing, whereas I'm pretty much the opposite. I know the obvious answer is looks don't matter, and for some people, just tell her, but I'm looking for perhaps a more indirect answer. A better solution. In my case, my main endeavour isn't necessarily to end up going out with her, but maybe just to let go, whilst keeping the relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Honeyspur Posted February 23, 2008 Share Posted February 23, 2008 You might want to take this opportunity to start learning how to overcome fear of rejection. I know for me, I asked a few of my guy friends out and they, very nicely mind you, said they did not feel the same way. But our friendship did not change one stitch. We are still friends today and it's 20 years later. Doing this really helped me develop the skill and thick skin needed to ask people out. Who better than a good friend? And there is the possibility that she likes you too. I'm sorry but there just is. Trying to wrap your head around the whole looks issue is meaningless because it's just a plain ol mystery why gorgeous women can go for average guys. So be sure you are not just "unready" for a relationship and that's the real reason you are avoiding being candid with her. Your friendship will grow either way. Link to post Share on other sites
Author roundglass Posted February 24, 2008 Author Share Posted February 24, 2008 Thanks for that reply. It helped, it really did, especially because it had personal experience to back it up. The future is something I always kind of think about, whether I'll still be close with the friends I'm closest with at the moment. Strangely enough, I'm male and most of my closest friends are female.. One thing though, a while ago, there was someone else, and although the relationship was slightly different, as most relationships are, it was a similar situation. I told a girl how I felt, and I really regretted it, because she 'acted' like she was fine with it, but she kind of started avoiding me, and that was really hard. It wasn't the rejection part, because I wasn't expecting anything back, nor was my intention to actually ask her out, but it's just I felt a relatively close friendship that kind of faded. Since then, this particular friendship has become fine again. I know... just because it happened once, I shouldn't make my decisions because of that. Link to post Share on other sites
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