Green Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 Im trying not to pass judgment, I simply want to understand why she has this view. you know why, and just asking the question is judgment enougth. Link to post Share on other sites
Arch Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 you know why, and just asking the question is judgment enougth. I have ideas as to why but they may be incorrect, I really don't know. I want to hear her answer. Link to post Share on other sites
Hoffle Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 i can be attracted to slighty chubby girls, but not whales or rib cages, for example. I wouldn't date anyone from the mississipi, thats for sure. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 I know a millionaire who drives a very inexpensive car. Link to post Share on other sites
Hoffle Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 I know a millionaire who drives a very inexpensive car. very shrewd, are you going to marry him for his monay! after all its funnay in a rich mans world.., Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 very shrewd, are you going to marry him for his monay! after all its funnay in a rich mans world.., Marry whom? The person I mentioned? Yes, I think I will propose to her (or even better to her grandkids). Link to post Share on other sites
Author yongyong Posted March 2, 2008 Author Share Posted March 2, 2008 I know some guys say chubby chicks are better when they do them from the top because belly fat works as a cushion. on the other hand , you can hit each others bone with skinny chicks. So if he likes you being fat because of this reason, would you still date him? Theres a difference between having a little fat and being obese, some guys like really obese chicks, some like skinny - its just a preference. I remember a porn site where all it has on it is really obese females consuming food. I personally find chicks that are average weight, or a little over to be attractive - also being a little muscular is a plus. I don't like those skinny bitchy girls who wear a bunch of makeup, they annoy the hell out of me. So it really depends on the person. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 I know some guys say chubby chicks are better when they do them from the top because belly fat works as a cushion. on the other hand , you can hit each others bone with skinny chicks. So if he likes you being fat because of this reason, would you still date him?If I am overweight and someone wants to date me exactly the way I am, why would I care about his motives? I wouldn't buy the motive you mentioned as real. I think if he said something like that, he was just being facetious. Unless you suspect that there is an agenda, I'd say he simply likes fat girls. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 I met my fiance online, and to be perfectly honest, I didn't really look at profiles that said people had a few extra pounds. Its not just a looks thing- if someone is overweight, then that means their lifestyle possibly wouldn't be the same as mine, and I like to eat healthily and exercise regularly. I would find it hard to date someone who wasn't at all into these things- and as much as people think they could overlook these kind of things, you can't really in a LTR. I don't drink much and am a nonsmoker- for me to date either a heavy OR a non drinker would be difficult I think. And I find smoking disgusting, so that would be a turnoff. I also wouldn't want to go into a R/ dating situation where I was thinking that I could possibly get that person to change or lose a few pounds, thats not a good start to a R. The thing I liked about online dating is that provided people are honest about themselves, you can sift through them and weed out ones that you wouldn't be interested in without actually meeting anyone in person or hurting anyones feelings, and you can be selective. Link to post Share on other sites
Lookingforward Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 (edited) I met my fiance online, and to be perfectly honest, I didn't really look at profiles that said people had a few extra pounds. The thing I liked about online dating is that provided people are honest about themselves, you can sift through them and weed out ones that you wouldn't be interested in without actually meeting anyone in person or hurting anyones feelings, and you can be selective. OMG...that's the key with online...honesty. I did meet one guy in person that I got along with really well online. He went from being 6'5" and 240 online to around 5'6" and at least 300 in person...it was only my being a nice person that kept me from peeling out of the parking lot leaving rubber when I saw him. Then he had the unmitigated gall to tell me I should have been happy with the 'inner person' and judged me as being superficial. I go to the gym, I look after myself, why would I want to get with someone that obviously was a bit of a couch slug to put it mildly? He never did get that it wasn't actually his weight that was the problem so much as he lied to me about it. People should be honest and give others the choice of pursuing a relationship or not based on the truth. "I'm so much cooler online" LMAO Edited March 2, 2008 by Lookingforward had another thought Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 I am like you Yong.. so what? I don't see it as being shallow but having personal preference... I don't like fat men (they are not fit).... I won't date them.. I don't like smokers (they don't care about their health)... I won't date them.. I don't like short men...(I prefer tall, dark and hansome) I won't date them.. I don't like men that drive old rusty cars...(that means they can't afford a decent car) I won't date them.. I don't like men that have no paying jobs...(that means they're not educated) I won't date them.. I don't like men that live with roomates...(they are losers and can't afford a place of their own) I won't date them.. I don't like men that wear tacky clothes...(they have no taste) I won't date them.. If this is shallow.. I really don't give a hoot... at least, I know what I want and what I DON'T WANT.. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 some people say that they are NOT shallow.. because they just can't afford to be.. or else they would NEVER date anyone.. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 I know a millionaire who drives a very inexpensive car. Heh, yep, most of the millionaires in my neighborhood drive dirty, beat up trucks. They're called "farmers" Me, my newest vehicle is 23 years old and it's a dirty, beat up old truck. Guess I better get out and wash it! On-topic, yeah, I like ladies with curves. No oedipus complexes here. Just imagine the classic Greek nude. Dated "overweight" women. Married one. She's more beautiful today than the day I married her. Too bad she's mad at me all the time now... and snores LOL Link to post Share on other sites
vintagecat Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 In 20 years the cars your date drives, their hair etc. won't mean a thing. Years ago I dated a man that was essentially more beautiful than most women, he was fit, had a professional job, a great car, great house, good hair, had fine tastes in art, food and wine, had money to spend, had an interesting social circle, blah, blah, blah but essentially turned out to be a dick with lots of problems. In a few months all that beauty turned to ugly and I couldn't move on quickly enough. I dated plenty of men with good looks, chiseled bodies, money, cars, lots of hair but it wasn't all it's hyped up to be and in the end I married an average guy who loved me and he turns out to be the best looking guy in our age group that I know. Could be love is blind but I think my mom had it right, beauty is skin deep but ugly goes to the bone. This doesn't mean you have to date someone who's looks you just can't get past but it might pay to have an open mind and be a little flexible in what you will and will not accept to find the person that will make you happy in the long run. After all, beauty is a fading commodity and what one has besides and in addition to that increases over time has real and lasting value. Cat Link to post Share on other sites
SpanksTheMonkey Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 Its all about personal preferences isn't it in dating and life in general I'm currently a obese women trying to lose weight. Gained most of it after a bad back injury and some of it from just being lazy afterwards. So if some one didn't want to date me because of that then so be it thats their pref. Long as they were respectful I have no probs with it larger people are not every ones thing. I like wise wouldn't date a smoker or a bald guy thats just my personal pref. The ones who lie on line are not helping the probs over weight people face its hard enough going thu life with out adding to the ignorance. I don't lie I use dating sites made for larger folk and I'm always 100% honest nothing less it makes my life easer. Link to post Share on other sites
SpanksTheMonkey Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 i can be attracted to slighty chubby girls, but not whales or rib cages, for example. I wouldn't date anyone from the Mississippi, thats for sure. Classic example of said ignorance but don't worry sweetie us whales don't like mules anyways your safe lol.. Yes stick to your guns there your def doing Mississippi a favor at least. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 He went from being 6'5" and 240 online to around 5'6" and at least 300 in personYou're funny! On-topic, yeah, I like ladies with curves. No oedipus complexes here. Just imagine the classic Greek nude. It's YOU who mentioned Oedipus - we didn't think about your mother for one second! Link to post Share on other sites
Leia Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 Her dads jet is probably owned by the company. And you could probably impress this girl with a Nissan Yip, owned by the company which my father owns. May I ask why? Is it because it indicates their financial status or because you expect from a guy (no matter how poor) to drive a nice car? You can buy a decent Jag for $15,000. Would this do it for you or does it have to be brand new? I love those cars cos I grew around those cars. If he's poor, obviously he can't afford it so why even bother expecting him to drive one? If he could afford a second hand car, good for him. I can ask for anything I want from my parents but I have to prove lots to get them. Good grades which I have never had problems with. If I wanted my own company, I have to come up with a proposal... I won't get the capital by snapping my fingers, I have to earn it. I admire those who would settle for less cos it's not easy but I really do admire them. Link to post Share on other sites
GoodOnPaper Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 it's very funny how the fxxx people are different in talking in groups and acting in personal life. (eg: they say 'I support gay rights' but in reality they hate those kinds) so I am straightforward person. When I mention about 'I checked this girl online, her profile says few extra pounds, I don't think I can deal with that' people usually say 'personaliy is the most important' bull**** and tell me how superficial I am. Some of them get offended too even though they are not fat. So why people lie and act like they are good example type person? If you are model type girl and don't mind dating bald, fat guy just because he is sincere that's fine. If you are athletic guy and want to date a plus size girl because she is so sweet, that's fine. I am just talking to those people who follow 'text book' principles online but act differently in real life. So, be as superficial as you want. If it's getting you want you want, more power to you. It is important to know what features attract you and what ones don't. My wife's weight has fluctuated between 220-300 pounds. When we met, as much as we clicked on some levels, the weight thing bothered me. I let the relationship continue because I didn't want to think I was "superficial" -- bad idea. I do find it amusing when people have this laundry list of little "requirements" that someone must have before they are considered datable. My limited experience has shown that when you actually get to know someone, much of the list ends up being thrown out the window. Link to post Share on other sites
Leia Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 Im trying not to pass judgment, I simply want to understand why she has this view. You're trying not to but you have already formed your opinion, haven't you? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 It's YOU who mentioned Oedipus - we didn't think about your mother for one second! Sure, that's what they all say What is that saying about quantity having a quality all its own? Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 Yip, owned by the company which my father owns. I love those cars cos I grew around those cars. If he's poor, obviously he can't afford it so why even bother expecting him to drive one? If he could afford a second hand car, good for him. I can ask for anything I want from my parents but I have to prove lots to get them. Good grades which I have never had problems with. If I wanted my own company, I have to come up with a proposal... I won't get the capital by snapping my fingers, I have to earn it. I admire those who would settle for less cos it's not easy but I really do admire them. I don't see it as earned in a hard way like it is for some people out there. You are certainly luckier than I am and I am luckier than some other folks are. In any case, I totally understand your viewpoint. If nothing else, you don't want to date or marry some poor guy and then exert your power over him. If I were a rich man's daughter (or rich myself), I wouldn't want to hook up with someone who will only want me for my money. The guy should be on the girl's level or higher or slightly lower, but not much lower. And nobody can call YOU a gold digger for that, cuz you're wealthy yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 I agree with RP.. I have no financial problems.. never had.. but you ask a guy to go see a movie or something then he says he has to wait for his next pay cheque.. sorry but he's out... Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 OMG! Sometimes when I eat I remember this TV show about morbidly obese folks and this guy eating sausages and similar food with his fingers... makes me lose my appetite instantly. On Friday I was driving home from work and I was stopped in traffic. The woman in the car behind me was morbidly obese - her facial features looked so tiny and were clustered in the middle of her face, surrounded by lots of lots of extra flesh. She was eating while driving and was chewing very vigorously, causing the extra flesh to jiggle. I kept looking back in the rear view mirror, I couldn't tear my eyes away. It was pretty revolting and yet fascinating at the same time. I imagined that she must habitually eat in her car. Anyway, OT, I make a distinction between people who are a little chub and those who are morbidly obese. I simply could not bring myself to date someone who was extremely fat - to the point where their health was at stake. But TBH I now feel that way about smokers or heavy drinkers - there's no way I would date someone like that now. If I was single. I actually like a little buddha belly on a man. Makes him more cuddly. Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted March 2, 2008 Share Posted March 2, 2008 women who are a little over weight can still have sex appeal... There are men and women of all sizes... as long as you take care of yourself one can still be attractive... You can be skinny, and not take care of your self... and you can have a few extra pounds and have intense sex appeal... To be attracted to someone is different for everyone, Link to post Share on other sites
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