Trialbyfire Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Perhaps... but I'm different from you and everyone here. I don't have the mentality here that I need to "keep" a woman. If she leaves me, then she was never worth keeping. I don't have the mentality that I "need" a woman. And this ironically has made me succeed. Ah yes, semantics. Allow me to clarify. Definition of keeping a woman, is to retain her interest at a level that's satisfactory for you and your partner. If you're not looking for a long-term partner, perhaps this is where we're differing. Dine and dash gives and takes nothing. Link to post Share on other sites
TheMatrix Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 actually chocolate raises the serotonin level in your brain enhancing feelings of love:love: so laughable I think not... That may or may not be true, but it operates under the assumption that attraction already exists. If she's not attracted, then it doesn't matter. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 That may or may not be true, but it operates under the assumption that attraction already exists. If she's not attracted, then it doesn't matter. It is a third date, so I think its safe to assume that the attraction is there, otherwise date one would have been as far as the OP made it. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 What I see is a whole lotta' reliance on game, in this thread. Games might get you a home run but if you're looking for anything beyond a single score, in one inning, in one game, good luck with that! Keep gaming and you'll find yourself going home...alone... Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Ah yes, semantics. Allow me to clarify. Definition of keeping a woman, is to retain her interest at a level that's satisfactory for you and your partner. If you're not looking for a long-term partner, perhaps this is where we're differing. Dine and dash gives and takes nothing. And by keeping interest means something different for everyone Some people are worth taking the time and effort to make them feel special. OP seems to really like this girl so if he wants to get her a card then so what.. It could be something funny between the two of them. Link to post Share on other sites
TheMatrix Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Dine and dash gives and takes nothing. See? This is how women think! When you (lmslms) take a girl and buy her dinner, you view the act differently than she does. She views it as nothing, and in turn, can throw you to the side like a piece of trash. Because as Trialbyfire has articulated, "Dine and dash gives and takes nothing." All the while, you're sitting there replaying the whole night in your head wondering where the heck you went wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lmslms Posted March 3, 2008 Author Share Posted March 3, 2008 if she didnt like me she wouldn't accept my dates though, right? Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 if she didnt like me she wouldn't accept my dates though, right? Exactly. She liked you just enough for the first date and now you are on your way to date 3, so I think that she likes you. Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Don't let Matrix make you think that she does not like you... just because of his failures in past dating lives... Tell us more, how did you meet and where are you guys going on your third date... And she does like you, a girl does not go on a third date with guy she is not attracted to... Link to post Share on other sites
TheMatrix Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 if she didnt like me she wouldn't accept my dates though, right? Lmslms, Please listen to me. She is accepting your dates thus far because she is getting something from it. At this point, it appears the only thing she is getting is an over-abundance of affection (turn off) and free food. Women can eat with ANYBODY. You need to show her your VALUE. The best dates are action dates. Take her someplace that you would be going anyway. For instance, I've taken numerous women on dates to the climbing gym. I get my workout in, I get to calibrate her interest level, there is some physical contact (escalating the attraction), she gets to see a little of my physique, and she is left with the impression of a memorable date. If things don't work out, you can cut it loose without any emotional or monetary investment. Seriously, you should take the money that you spend on dinners and chocolates and cards and all that other b.s. and dump it in a high interest-bearing account. Link to post Share on other sites
TheMatrix Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Don't let Matrix make you think that she does not like you... just because of his failures in past dating lives... "I have failed time and time again. And that is why I succeed." -Michael Jordan Link to post Share on other sites
Author lmslms Posted March 3, 2008 Author Share Posted March 3, 2008 Don't let Matrix make you think that she does not like you... just because of his failures in past dating lives... Tell us more, how did you meet and where are you guys going on your third date... And she does like you, a girl does not go on a third date with guy she is not attracted to... lol, here is a quick run down.......... met this girl from Canada on the Internet around christmas time. i live in Sydney Austalia, and it just so happens to be that this girl has was studying in Sydney last year at Uni. She is again studying this year at the same Uni. She went back to Canada from Australia to be with her family for christmas, but we ended up nearly talking on the internet everyday for hours at a time. This girl arrived back in Sydney a fortnight ago, and we ended up going out a week later, whereby we had a couple of drinks, coffee and a bite to eat. Things went well that night. We ended up going out or dinner at a restuarant 2 nights ago, whereby we shared a innocent first kiss and then another one later on. This girl is amazing, like no one i have ever met before, i have never been so happy? is this possible after just 2 dates (bearing in mind that we have chatted online and on the phone for a while before that). I spoke to this girl again today, and asked her did she want to do something before friday, because i have to attend a business conference for which i wont be back into town until sunday on, yet she said she had a busy schedule tommorow and what not with her studies and research for a upcoming project. we have spoken on the phone about doing an outdoor activity next week some time along with some lunch, and she said to call her when i get back from my business trip. Am i being too keen at this point? should i pull back a little, like i am sure she knows that i like her and what not, it's just that i dont want her to think that i am overbearing or too keen, (as i respect that she has all this uni work to do, and i want her to do the best she can at it, yet i wanna spend time with her, because i am really falling for this girl.) I think this girl is going back to Canada after her studies in July/August sometime, so i wanna really make her aware that i really like her and that i would like to down the track have a relationship with her, and i wanna in the not so distant future make her aware that i am willing tol make sacrifices such as moving to Canada and what not to be with her or to wherever she wants to go to pursue her career. our third date will be at like an art gallery, because i know she loves this kind of stuff Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 And by keeping interest means something different for everyone Some people are worth taking the time and effort to make them feel special. OP seems to really like this girl so if he wants to get her a card then so what.. It could be something funny between the two of them. I agree with some people being worth the time and effort to make them feel special. If you're one of the crowd, it's too easy to think, oh well...and walk away. See? This is how women think! When you (lmslms) take a girl and buy her dinner, you view the act differently than she does. She views it as nothing, and in turn, can throw you to the side like a piece of trash. Because as Trialbyfire has articulated, "Dine and dash gives and takes nothing." All the while, you're sitting there replaying the whole night in your head wondering where the heck you went wrong. Apparently euphemisms aren't your thing. You might want to reread what I wrote and apply logic a different way. If my comment is taken at face value, which is the way you took it, you feel like you deserve bang for your buck. Oops, another euphemism. Let me know if you require further explanation. Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 I think that she likes you, I don't think that your being taken and I don't think that she is using you... The law of attraction is like attracts like, and obviously you both like spending time with eachother... And yes a girl "can eat with anyone" However it seems that she is choosing to spend time with you. People meet in different ways, you guys were meant to meet, and the fact that she you kiss her is a good sign. I could not imagine kissing anyone I am not attracted to, let things play out, take opportunities with her as they come, and again go with your gut instinct. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lmslms Posted March 3, 2008 Author Share Posted March 3, 2008 I think that she likes you, I don't think that your being taken and I don't think that she is using you... The law of attraction is like attracts like, and obviously you both like spending time with eachother... And yes a girl "can eat with anyone" However it seems that she is choosing to spend time with you. People meet in different ways, you guys were meant to meet, and the fact that she you kiss her is a good sign. I could not imagine kissing anyone I am not attracted to, let things play out, take opportunities with her as they come, and again go with your gut instinct. the only thing i am worried about is us being rom two different countries. but i am sure that things will work out if all goes well Link to post Share on other sites
TheMatrix Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 i wanna really make her aware that i really like her and that i would like to down the track have a relationship with her, and i wanna in the not so distant future make her aware that i am willing tol make sacrifices such as moving to Canada and what not to be with her or to wherever she wants to go to pursue her career. Please lmslms. You are not thinking clearly. It is possible to develop a strong attraction early on, especially over the internet. I won't get into the "why" of this, as I think we all know. She may be the one for you, and by jove I hope that's the case. But DO NOT, under any circumstances, tell her that you will move HALF WAY AROUND THE WORLD just for her and her career! What about YOUR career? Think about what you are saying man! Link to post Share on other sites
Author lmslms Posted March 3, 2008 Author Share Posted March 3, 2008 Please lmslms. You are not thinking clearly. It is possible to develop a strong attraction early on, especially over the internet. I won't get into the "why" of this, as I think we all know. She may be the one for you, and by jove I hope that's the case. But DO NOT, under any circumstances, tell her that you will move HALF WAY AROUND THE WORLD just for her and her career! What about YOUR career? Think about what you are saying man! im hearing what u are saying, but down the track i thats what needs to happen i will be more than happy to do that Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 lmslms... I think you'll do OK.. just don't go overboard.. be patient... You just said she's from Canada.. and you're in Australia.. that's an awful long distance.. that's probably why she's protecting herself.. and taking it slow.. she is realistic about this relationship... and the distance.. Just take your time.. this is the best advice I can give you.. don't come on as being needy or clingy.. she's a busy girl.. take your time !!!! Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Please lmslms. You are not thinking clearly. It is possible to develop a strong attraction early on, especially over the internet. I won't get into the "why" of this, as I think we all know. She may be the one for you, and by jove I hope that's the case. But DO NOT, under any circumstances, tell her that you will move HALF WAY AROUND THE WORLD just for her and her career! What about YOUR career? Think about what you are saying man! OMG no not that....you don't want to be happy and start a life... Dude why are you trying to control him...let him do what feels right.. He is just asking what he should do on a third date... Quit it... Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Please lmslms. You are not thinking clearly. It is possible to develop a strong attraction early on, especially over the internet. I won't get into the "why" of this, as I think we all know. She may be the one for you, and by jove I hope that's the case. But DO NOT, under any circumstances, tell her that you will move HALF WAY AROUND THE WORLD just for her and her career! What about YOUR career? Think about what you are saying man! I totally agree here... DO NOT TELL HER that you are willing to sacrifice your career, etc.. for her... YOU WILL probably lose her... Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 im hearing what u are saying, but down the track i thats what needs to happen i will be more than happy to do that lms.. yes, if it happens down the road.. fine.. but don't precipitate it.. this is waaayyy too soon in the relationship.. gosh you'll scare her to death.. Link to post Share on other sites
TheMatrix Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 IApparently euphemisms aren't your thing. You might want to reread what I wrote and apply logic a different way. If my comment is taken at face value, which is the way you took it, you feel like you deserve bang for your buck. Oops, another euphemism. Let me know if you require further explanation. Why wouldn't I take it at face value? Am I supposed to decipher your "Womanese" speak? I give this gentleman straight talk. I am not pulling any punches. Why am I doing this? Because he needs to quit viewing her as the prize, and see himself as the prize. That's why. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lmslms Posted March 3, 2008 Author Share Posted March 3, 2008 I totally agree here... DO NOT TELL HER that you are willing to sacrifice your career, etc.. for her... YOU WILL probably lose her... so just take it and see where it goes, right? what happens when it is time for her to go home? i have to bring it up then, dont i? Link to post Share on other sites
BUENG1 Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 OMG no not that....you don't want to be happy and start a life... Dude why are you trying to control him...let him do what feels right.. He is just asking what he should do on a third date... Quit it... You really think its reasonable for someone to move from one country and uproot themselves for someone they've known for probably a couple weeks, and seen only 3 times? Really? Link to post Share on other sites
TheMatrix Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 I totally agree here... DO NOT TELL HER that you are willing to sacrifice your career, etc.. for her... YOU WILL probably lose her... Lizzie, thank god! Another voice of clarity in here! Link to post Share on other sites
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