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WhatShouldIDo?


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So im a cashier at a grocery store, i have no car, and no license, but that doesnt change the fact that im lonely, its rare that i find someone who im really attracted to, and last summer, a girl started working at the store , we never really had any conversations, i asked her once what school she went to and what grade she was in but thats about it, i was abit more shy back then, but very observant, i heard her mention that she was on the speech team and she played tennis, so besides that i dont really know anything about her, she quit after about 4 weeks and ive seen her come in to buy stuff a few times, i recently find her on facebook but im not sure whether or not to try adding her, i only found out her last name because i looked it up in the schedule book when she still worked at the store, my only way of contacting her are either through my brother who doesnt really know her, or an old friend who is in speech, but i dont think he knows her all that well either, shes around 17 and im almost 21, but i dont think a few years makes all that much of a difference, so what should i do? i dont want to come off as a creep or a stalker or anything...last time she came in she said that she and her boyfriend had separated but i dont know her current status...

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SoHotZanzibar

get some guts and TALK to her. Then excuse yourself and ask if she would mind continuing the conversation over the phone or email.

Whats the worst that happens? She says no?

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xpaperxcutx

If you constantly think about her, looks up her last name, read her facebook ALL THE TIME, then you are stalking her. lol

 

Seriously though, if you like the girl I don't why you can't bring yourself to talk to her, to actually get to know her. It's okay to strike up a little conversation with her if she's shopping where you work because you guys used to be coworkers. And there's nothing wrong with adding her on face book, afterall, facebook, myspace, etc. are just places for social networking and meeting friends. So there's nothing wrong with that.

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She doesnt shop there very often and she never comes through my line, which means i have no way of reaching her, and i cant talk to her in person because i have no way of contacting her...and i dont look at her facebook all day long...just a few hours a day:sick:

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Angels&Airwaves

Follow the advice of the two other poster's, you won't get better advice, all I will say is don't get your heart set on her in case she has a boyfriend, it's happened to me a few times and it's quite gut wrenching.

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confused2007

Does her facebook say single?

 

Write her something that'll make her laugh and let the conversation begin that way. Don't come on too strong otherwise she'll perceive you as needy and desperate. Relax. Be smooth. Be cool.

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don't make it seem like you like her right away. if there's one thing i know, it's that. say something like 'hey, remember me from work? i came across your page and thought i'd shoot you a friend request. what's up?'. just make small talk. ask her where she works now, how she likes it, how she liked work back where you two worked, college, anything.

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Well i was thinking maybe about saying something like,"if you dont mind me asking what was the point of working at jewel for a month? did u need a new tennis racket or something?" i think it would be funny but she never told me she played tennis, and i dont want to come off as a creep, but do u think that will be okay? or should i try something else? her page says its complicated under relationship status, but ive seen her boyfriend and i can take if i need be, but i heard her say that they broke up so who knows...

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confused2007
Well i was thinking maybe about saying something like,"if you dont mind me asking what was the point of working at jewel for a month? did u need a new tennis racket or something?" i think it would be funny but she never told me she played tennis, and i dont want to come off as a creep, but do u think that will be okay? or should i try something else? her page says its complicated under relationship status, but ive seen her boyfriend and i can take if i need be, but i heard her say that they broke up so who knows...

 

I don't know if I would use 'tennis racket.'

 

My first thoughts when you say 'complicated' under relationship status is that her and her bf/exbf have an on and off type relationship. IMO I would personally be cautious in developing feelings for her as this isn't usually something you want to be mixed up in.

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as my friend said, i should avoid her, because i might just end up as a rebound guy, which is great advice, but it is a rarity that i find someone who i am really attracted to, id at least like to make myself known to her, isnt there anything i can say...

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Angels&Airwaves

Just speak to her and get to know her, but I’m sure when you least expect it another girl will walk right past you and catch your attention, it’s happened to me once, or twice before.

 

As for your earlier post about the tennis racket, I would advice you not to post that, its cringe worthy.

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Ive decided to try to at least befriend her, this is where im at so far, its a good start i think...

 

 

Me

 

11:38am Mar 7th

 

so whats new, did u ever get another job?

 

 

Her

 

5:22pm Mar 7th

 

well im actually just babsysitting for now and i have to do that at like 6 but other than that no not rele

how ve u been

 

 

 

Me

 

10:14pm Mar 7th

 

Well lets just say im still working at jewel, the work day goes by slowly but time seems to go by quickly if that makes any sense... be glad you got out as soon as you did, ive been there 2 years in june, and it feels like 20, its a vortex of death i tell u, a vortex of death....

 

 

 

Her

 

3:24pm Mar 9th

 

o thats sux

ya i no i am glad

hahahaha i no what u mean though

 

 

 

Me

 

5:02pm Mar 9th

 

im mean i do meet some interesting people and have some interesting conversations, but its just sooo repetitive and boring, how is sitting on babies? any fun?

 

 

 

Her

 

5:06pm Mar 9th

 

ummmm well it was fine and i got paid 70 bux for like 4 and a half hours so ya i think its pretty worth it

 

 

 

Me

 

5:12pm Mar 9th

 

bout 17.50 an hour, i make 8.35, thats over double what i make, you suck... were they at least like ogre babies or something?

 

 

 

Her

 

5:29pm Mar 9th

 

nope 1 perfect child and her other perfect friend who slept over and i got a manuicure and a facial at their house becuz they r LOADED

 

 

 

Me

 

5:36pm Mar 9th

 

maybe next time theyll give u a car instead of money... i can see it now

"oh yea i forgot to go to the bank today... will it be okay if i pay you with a rolls royce instead?"

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the last thing i asked her was this;

 

whats the joint look like? we talkin a big spooky mansion or just like a 5 bedroom? does it have a Mcdonalds built in?

 

 

 

 

its been a few days and she hasnt replied, ive noticed that shes been on though so should i give her a few more days and start up a new conversation, or does that mean she doesnt like me and i should move on?

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confused2007

bro,

 

I'd move on. I'm getting the vibe, between her responses to you and her not replying, that she's not interested.

 

I think the conversation was going 'ok' until you mentioned the Rolls Royce. IMO it came off like you were trying too hard to be funny making you needy. I should know from experience :laugh:

 

I'm sure its not the first time you heard this, but next time, just relaaax. Be yourself and you'll find someone that matches your true personality naturally.

 

Don't take it personally. You win some and lose some. But the important thing is you've tried. Now keep trying and keep learning and you'll be a playboy in no time. ;)

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Dunno if it makes a difference or not but she actually did reply to the rolls royce part, she said "hahaha they totally would" and then i replied with the other stuff and was ignored...

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confused2007

hmmmm....well you know the best way to find out.

 

Why don't you ask her out to a movie, "Hey the movie X is out and I heard it was really good. Wanna see it?"

 

If not a movie, cup of coffee? Or something fun - putt putt golf, window shopping, park, bicycle ride, a hobby you both enjoy, etc. Something casual and low pressure so you can enjoy each others company. I've always seen the best results with those kind of dates.

 

You can spend all your time wondering whether or not she would say yes or no, or you can find out.

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Well the thing is i dont really know anything about her, right now it would almost be like a complete stranger walking up to her and asking her on a date, i also at this moment dont have a car so and no way of contacting her besides facebook, i figured i could get to know her alittle bit and then maybe ask her on a date, but im not too sure what kinda questions to ask, i dont want to come off too strong, but i dont want to come off as a wimp either...

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