NuTuDating Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 tb, cybersex with someone other than who you're dating IS CHEATING. It is. You're not wrong in felling that it is. It's cheating. Ditch his ass. There are people out there who do not cheat. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tb13 Posted March 11, 2008 Author Share Posted March 11, 2008 So he is still in my house acting like nothing ever happened. Brought home a new laptop yesterday to "show it off". I can't help but think that he is doing his cybersex thing at work. He says he can't access IM, but I know better. I just don't know how to get the whole thing off my mind. Link to post Share on other sites
NuTuDating Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 I'm not usually a fan of ultimatums, but this is a case where it's appropriate. Stop having cybersex or we're done. That's pretty much what I'd do. Link to post Share on other sites
clandestinidad Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 Why do you feel that you need "to get this whole thing off your mind"?? What you need to do is move on with your life. This guy is always going to treat you like crap. You allow him to. This doesn't seem like it will get better because he is refusing all responsibility for his actions. You think what he did was cheating, as the rest of us do, and your fiance doesn't think its cheating. The two of you have such differing values and morals, that I'm not sure a healthy long-term relationship would work. He thinks it's okay to have online sexual encounters with other people, and you don't. How far do you think he would go? He seems capable of saying that in-person sexual encounters aren't cheating for some reason which he would justify for himself. Then he would blame that on you too. Would you be okay with this? How far does your passivity go? Would you try talking to him and changing his outlook? Or would you THEN break up with him? What I mean is, you're either okay with things like this or you're not. You're either okay with someone treating you like this or not. You need to decide for yourself and act accordingly. You cannot hope that some day he will change his mind and stop doing it just because you said you don't like it. You have to be strong enough to say that it's not right for you, and end the relationship. Life is too short to spend with people who treat you like crap and blame their indiscretions on you. This relationship is quickly headed into a deep, dark hole with you curled up miserable at the bottom. Do not marry this person. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 You're holding onto a lost cause, tb13. Do you want a life like this, always waiting and wondering? What if he decides to take his little cyber chats into real life? Is he then going to say it's your fault for stressing him out, so he needed a diversion, someone to make him feel good about himself? Do you have any self-esteem at all? Wake up and smell the cow dung girl! Link to post Share on other sites
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