redfathom Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 I too became pregnant on the pill several years ago. Honestly, the only form of BC I trust is abstinance. Sorry but what, now the OP was pregnant before, what happened to that baby? Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 Not sure if this has been said or not. Once again, I don't have time to read the whole thread. But I did read something about MM's wife working to pay for G's baby or babies. Make no mistake, the courts will side with the wife. The family bills and her baby will be the first to be taken care of. If G pushes this thing with the MM, the fate of how much she will actually get is in the hands of the wife. Unless the wife is a saint, I think she will make sure that G gets as little as possible. G has no control over how the wife or the court will react. From what I have seen in the past, courts do not take a liking to MM and OW when it comes to who gets paid. Depends on where you live, but generally the wife has the upper hand when her H has been having an affair. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 I too became pregnant on the pill several years ago. Honestly, the only form of BC I trust is abstinance. Sorry but what, now the OP was pregnant before, what happened to that baby? she had an abortion. Link to post Share on other sites
redfathom Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 I guess I missed that in this mess somewhere. Since we know she is not against abortions and is only 26, maybe now would be a good time to consider it again. Then wait until she is in a committed relationship. I know women can raise babies on their own, I have seen it done many times. But I do feel that children will do better with at least one responsible parent. Just my humble opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
nadiaj2727 Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 I guess I missed that in this mess somewhere. Since we know she is not against abortions and is only 26, maybe now would be a good time to consider it again. Then wait until she is in a committed relationship. I know women can raise babies on their own, I have seen it done many times. But I do feel that children will do better with at least one responsible parent. Just my humble opinion. Well Gwyneth didn't ask for advice on whether she should keep her baby or have an abortion. You don't know much of her story, her abortion in the past was very hard for her and she doesn't want to have another abortion (not to speak for her, but that's what she's said on here in the past). I understand why you think that abortion might be a good decision here but it's not really your place to tell a pregnant woman to have an abortion she knows she doesn't want. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 The court will side with ALL the babies before ANY of the adults. Yes, but if his wife leaves him because of the affair. His wife will most certainly get the lions share of support because she will not only get child support, she will get alimony as well. Like I said, depends on where you live, but courts do not look favorably on infidelity. Before anyone gets into fault and no fault, remember I said it depends on where you live. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 I don't think G is looking for any $$ from MM for herself, just her bab(ies). Link to post Share on other sites
redfathom Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 As long as she does not want to keep the baby to trap the MM. I know she said she does not want the money, then she says she will get all the money she can. She really doesn't know what she wants. I understand abortion is a hard decision, one I hope I never have to face, I am sure I won't be cause I take caution not to get pregnant. Even after being married for 8 years. I had a friend who wanted a baby so bad she did not care who the donor was, but whoever the guy is that get's trapped, well that's not fair. She almost trapped my BIL who had only been dating her for 2 months, because she stopped taking her birth control pills. They only dated for four months...so what would have happened then. And he thought she was taking her pills. Again, if I was him I would not have really left it up to only her and would have also wore a condom. Link to post Share on other sites
SoxPrincess Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 Ain't that the truth. By the time I had mine, I felt like my doctors recognized me, but not by my face. Boy ain't that the truth LB! I gave birth to both of my children on military bases, one of which was a very small community. Everytime I'd go to the PX (like a department store) or the grocery store, I'd see one of my OB's and after I gave birth, I was at a community picnic and ran into half of the people that were in the delivery room with me. It's kind of hard to hold a conversation when you know the 6 ppl talking to you have all intimately seen your vajayjay This hit me hard. This theme of how its not the man's job to be responisble for a child if he doesn't want one. This concept is just stunning. Especially in regards to a married man who is having an affair. Okay. So yes. Gwyn had sex. She apparently had unprotected sex. From what I can infer, she is single, of age and wasn't impaired. Guilty of bad judgement for the no protection. And Gwyn's MM had sex. Apparently, again, unprotected sex. Yet, from what I can tell, IS married, IS in a commited relationship that is producing children. And yet, he isn't at fault? Isn't responsible? He is also guilty of bad judgement. But not just for the lack of protection. Why? He is the only one in this situation that is legally and morally connected to another person. Is Gwyn crappy for sleeping with a married man? Absoultly. But HE is the one who put his W in the situation she is in. If you have sex you are 100% responsible for any outcome. Including STDs and babies. He decided that he "wanted" children the MOMENT he had sex with Gwyn. From 5th grade on, anyone who has sex is aware that the outcome of sex is children. Thats why they have that class in school. So if you have sex, you KNOW it can and does create a child. So the guy finds out the girl is pregnant. She decides for whatever reason she is having that baby. Now he shouldn't be responsible? Because he doesn't want a kid? Wrong. He knew the moment he had sex with her he could create life. If he didn't want to be responsible for that life, then he should have made the decision to not have sex. Period. AMEN...AMEN!!! Yes this is a MM we're discussing, but that aside he still made the decision to have sex outside his M, KNOWING what could happen during the act and he should be held responsible. Like someone else said, unless Gwyn tied him to the bed, ripped off his condom and raped him, he made an equal decision with her to have sex and this is the end result..period. Gwyn, I'm truly sorry that this thread has taken the turn that it has. I know this is a difficult time for you and there will be much harder times ahead and it would be nice to know that you could go somewhere and vent & seek support. Unfortunately, for every "good" post here that offers that for you, there are more negative posts and for someone pregnant, it's just not a good idea to keep subjecting yourself to that. Perhaps you could exchange email addresses/PM's with those of us who have supported you and you could use us as a sounding board instead of having to continually go through this. Please feel free to PM me at anytime, I've given birth twice, I've unfortunately been through the abortion situation and I'm an xOW..so I feel like I can relate to SOME of your situation and would absolutely be open to just listening when you need it. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony Posted March 18, 2008 Senior Moderators Share Posted March 18, 2008 This thread has devolved into off topic arguments. It has run it's course. Thanks to everybody who participated. Link to post Share on other sites
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