Author danandlea Posted November 10, 2003 Author Share Posted November 10, 2003 I keep dreaming of my ex and US, does this neccessarily (cant spell) mean anything????? Link to post Share on other sites
lost Posted November 11, 2003 Share Posted November 11, 2003 hi dan, i've been following u'r story since the beginning, my relationship broke up about the same time as yours, and well I'd like to say that you've been an inspiration to me, the way u've progressed and moved on.. sorry to say that i'm not as far down the road to recovery as u are, but it's good to hear that u've managed to carry on with things so well! Do u often think about her? maybe that's why she appears in u'r dreams so much. Anyway thanks for keeping us posted and glad to hear u'r happy and out there enjoying u'r self! Link to post Share on other sites
Author danandlea Posted December 3, 2003 Author Share Posted December 3, 2003 hi i met 2 realy nice girls the other week, it turns out they were best mates, they both wanted to be with me but i only wanted to be with girl A, girl B got stroppy with me and girl A so girl A flew off the handle at me n called me all the names under the sun, i know that girl A wants to be with me coz she is always talking to me but she blames me for us not being able to get together even thou i told girl B i didnt like her. sorry if this sounds rucshed but its getting me down. please write back anyone dan (the initial post starter) Link to post Share on other sites
Mont Posted January 16, 2004 Share Posted January 16, 2004 Funnily enough, my girl seems...believe it or not...yeah....hmmm (refer to old posts, then read between the lines!) I'm glad you're doing well, Dan - at this point, it seems that if I wrote 5,000 words I wouldn't scratch the surface of all I've learned since the last time I posted something here... I only have this to say, in summary, to anyone who happens to read this, and ALL the posts which say the only solution is to get over it, both in this thread, and throughout the site... Bullocks. It's the blind leading the blind... I mean, obviously get over being hurt, get a life (as it were), develop the things you love, learn how to have a fullfilling life, follow your dreams and passions, all of that - but almost all of the people who have posted here, if you think about it, are not the successful ones. Why else would they be here? I only found this site when I was traumatized, almost. I think it's great that Dan still comes back and updates! (yeah, dan! ;-) My conclusion, at the end of the day, is that most people are selfish, self-centered, egocentric, small-minded, somewhat evolved hairless apes. Really. I think everyone who told Dan that he had a "problem" because he loved this girl so much is evil, or at least very bad. Cynicism, or sophistication, just cuz it inevitably comes after innocence, doesn't make it better, anymore than the fall of the Roman Empire was better than the Empire, just cuz it came after - or that old age is better than youth. Most people are wrong, IMO, and the blind leading the blind will lead you over the cliff with the lemmings, to confuse and conflate metaphors. In simple terms, love is an amazing, powerful, and wonderful thing, popular modern culture tells you love is all about YOU, what YOU can learn, how YOU can improve, what YOU get out of a relationship. That is, IMO, sick, selfish, evil and bad. Love is about learning how to give, selflessly, while maintaining your own dignity and self respect, and individuated personality (jungian bs, sorry...) But it is... i.e., Dan's love, IMO, for that girl, was GREAT. It was LOVE. FULL ON. No one's going to ever write a movie about the two girls who are fighting over him now. Okay, all in perspective. Of course, the girl, Lea, whatever her name was, had her own problems, etc., - maybe Dan - you, if you are there - are much much happier now, blah blah blah - but I still hope that someday you either love her, or someone else, as much. That's enough self-righteous bs for now, but I just think the whole way so many people look at love is wrong. Just my 42 cents worth...(inflation) Link to post Share on other sites
Author danandlea Posted January 18, 2004 Author Share Posted January 18, 2004 cheers mont, i am really happy at the moment, i am almost driving and i have found myself love once more, i now learn that leanne has a boyfriend but it didnt hit me as hard as i thought it would, i havent seen or heard from her in months and i can honestly say i no longer miss her, true i loved her but thats in the past, i now look forward into the future, the girls that were fighting over me turned out to be nothing and now i have met a girl that lives 100miles away, but i have seen her loads of times and the comes down most weekends. all i can say is that mont is right, love is great and can be shared more than once, each time it will get stronger as relationships teach you alot in life. thanx mont, il updat again soon. Link to post Share on other sites
Author danandlea Posted March 17, 2004 Author Share Posted March 17, 2004 I just read my posts and thank you all once more, i have pulled thru it, and i have found and lost quite a frew since then, im currently looking again and it is fun, weird but fun. dan Link to post Share on other sites
Author danandlea Posted April 13, 2004 Author Share Posted April 13, 2004 well i must say sometimes wenim lonely i wil thnk of the one that got away lol but everyone will always hold a special place in their heart for their first love, even more so when it seemed to be their true tlove!! from dan the thread starter Link to post Share on other sites
tom_gbr Posted April 13, 2004 Share Posted April 13, 2004 dan my situation is quite similar to yours...im 20 and she is 16...my ex finished it a month ago now because she was having a lot of problems in her life...some mental...we also live two hours apart...and she needs to be single to sort everything out in her life..she didnt need a boyfriend. at the time when she finished it she said that she still loved me and that she wanted to come out of it as friends. i know what you mean about the stress thing as well....my ex girlfriend did exactly the same thing...she used to get angry with me for the stupidist reasons but she always came round and apologised. everything started to change with us when she got a part time job...working made her really happy...i know this sounds stupid but it was like when she got the job she didnt need me anymore...she didnt have the time for me i know that much. i treated her like a queen as well....always treated her right...bough her gifts every now and then....took her to disneyland paris for valentines day...i was jealous though and a bit clingy...but the jealousy came about as she kissed another guy a month into the relationship....she too also gets on with guys better than girls. she is also my first love....she is so pretty and has a great personality...everyone used to stare at her when we would go places... its been a month now...i still love her so much....at the start of the break up we had a lot of contact still for around a week and a bit....text messages daily and phone calls every now and then....the last time i spoke to her was two wednesdays ago....i rang her. she did send me a message not last friday but the friday before saying that she was missing me. im wondering if this ' friends ' thing is just going to be one sided...at the moment it seems its going to be me contact her all the time. i just really cant understand why she doesnt want me back in her life....we are so good together...we love each other so much...what is she thinking right now?..is she thinking about me?...is she missing me?....will time apart without me contacting her make her realise what i mean to her?....what if she meets some one else? im hating this so much...i think im going to ring her wednesday Link to post Share on other sites
NEONINK Posted April 13, 2004 Share Posted April 13, 2004 I wasn't going to reply to this endless thread, but I wanted to say to you young guys out there something, and I hope you pay attention. A good man is hard to find. She may have found it now, but what appears gold is sometimes fool's gold. If you are young, then especially guys, they are changing and rearranging. Men just get better with age. 1) Take some time to get to the gym and buff up a little, 2) get to the library and brush up on some romance novels to learn more passion, 3) get to night school and take a cooking class to have a few awesome meals you can just throw together, 4) get to the mall and buy some candles and add a little ambiance and buy a few new shirts while you are at it. Now... find yourself a really nice girl that you can take home to mother, and don't lower your standards but increase them. You have, so you may as well find a g/f that's better too. One day, I PROMISE YOU! You old g/f will be the one crying her heart out wishing! Link to post Share on other sites
Author danandlea Posted May 23, 2004 Author Share Posted May 23, 2004 hi i just read the last few threads and it really did bring a tear to my eye, i really hope she realises what she has done and i cant wait for the day she does, coz i will laugh in her face, i am over her and if she ever wanted me to get back with her i would probably laugh at first then just say sorry i dont do second chances, its been a year nearly since we split up and i can honestly say i have changed and i hope she is really happy where she is in life. Dan Link to post Share on other sites
Mont Posted June 22, 2004 Share Posted June 22, 2004 Well, in a longer time frame, but the same sort of thing (to the guy who just posted above about...sorry, can't hit back or will lose my message - the guy who mentioned euro disney..) (we went out for three years...) Finaally, after months apart, got back togehter. Then, in a sort of mini-way, we went through our entire relationship again, except over weeks, rather than months/years. Now, she's done the same thing again, and claims she was just using me cuz she felt lonely. I recall her saying, in a passionatel moment, "i love you I love you I love you - you know I'm not just using you, right?" An odd addendum to a passionalte statement, I thought. But ignored it. I asked her, point blank, is this what is happening? No, no, no, I know my mind, I've thought it through, I've made my decision, she swore. She was so much happier after we got back together that her mum was getting her brochures and things to try to arrange a holiday over the summer for us. Her mum! And now,she's acting cold again. She said 6 months apart, then maybe! Pah! Every time I talk to her, these days, its gets worse. I have been pushing to hard, not giving her space, but I'm just so frustrated after waiting for months, and being so kind and good to her in the meantime, that she wants this space. Any rational person would say dump the b^&*ch, but I do love her. I can SEE that she's a bad influence on me in many ways, and that I spend so much time trying to live up to her expectaions that I lose myself in it. I can see it, but i can't stop loving her. She needs me sometimes, inspires me others, when we are actually together spending time, we BOTH consistently have the best times of our lives, I feel I float in the air after speaking to her, as if I've got a huge crush, and this is after more than 3 1/2 years. Yes, just before we broke up a year ago, I was getting bored with her, but, I was willing to overlook that even at the time, I knew it was just a phase. I dunno, man, I love her so much that, just now, writing these words, I felt a shiver over my body... There it is! A year, almost exactly, later, and still more in love than ever... Link to post Share on other sites
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