joel Posted March 19, 2008 Share Posted March 19, 2008 has anyone dated or has any friends who are just totally selfish. i dated this girl whenever we went out she always wanted to pick the restaurant to eat at-i didn't even get to pick ,and yes i paid, the movie well she picked-i wanted to watch a different flick ,but she lied and said that movie was 3 hrs-later found out it was only 1 hr 50 min. i always go out to her area, but shes unwilling to come out to my area-1 hr commute. when u ask her to go to your area shes so damn hestiant. she ask you to hang out with her, but yes its always in her area, and doing what she wants, and not what you want. be it watch the movei you want, go shopping at the places you want, go to your area to play tennis. its whatever is convient , what she wants, what she likes this is also with friends too. when they want you to hang out with them m you are there, but when u want to hang out with them its like tehy are always busy. youu guys have stories or sittuaition of selfish girls you dated or even selfish guy freinds or even friends. please tell me the story Link to post Share on other sites
fishtaco Posted March 19, 2008 Share Posted March 19, 2008 Are you a push over? Push overs tend to attract bossy people. If you don't like it, stop being a push over. But know that some people will always try to take advantage of you. If you stop being a push over, you will probably lose those people, and it'll feel like you're being rejected. But you're not. You are rejecting them. Then you can meet more people that are not users, in both friend and romantic partner categories. Relationships, both platonic and romantic, should go both ways. If you find anyone that demands more and gives less, distance yourself from them. If that's what you want. So yes, I run into selfish people all the time. They naturally go away after awhile because I won't give in, and I'm not easy to manipulate. They'll usually go seek easier targets. So after many years of this type of filtering, the good ones stay, the bad ones go away, and what I have left is a pool of good people as my friends. But some people like to be used. So they are a perfect match for users. As long as it's consensual, do whatever you want as long as it makes you happy. Well, actually that's even optional, since some people like to be miserable. So do whatever you want as long as you know that's what you want. Link to post Share on other sites
audrey_1 Posted March 19, 2008 Share Posted March 19, 2008 I've always tried to compromise, but I'm not shy about asserting what I like, either. I see it as sometimes there's something I really want to do at a given time, but then it's fun to learn something through another person's likes/interests that may differ from my own. I get to learn something new. My ex-fiancee evolved into this: -- Picking up food from nice restaurants -- Bringing it home to watch Law and Order reruns from TV trays -- He wouldn't watch a movie no matter how much I begged. Selfish. He worked out of town three weeks a month, and his excuse was he'd been traveling and wanted to stay home. But I had been home those three weeks without him trying to be responsible by NOT eating out all the time, etc. I just wanted to spend time with him out for a little while, having a sensory experience. He wouldn't budge. Notice I said EX-fiancee. Link to post Share on other sites
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