Owl Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 My point is that Jealousy on both ends is absurd. Reread my whole post. This is interesting to me. My experience has been that very often BOTH parties are jealous of each other (BS and OM/OW). In my case, I was jealous of OM...after all, she was telling him that she loved him. I was also (amazingly enough) extremely angry/hateful of him. For a variety of reasons. He'd posed as my friend, the whole time wooing my wife. Etc... In HIS case, he was clearly jealous (and I know this for a fact...I read their IM conversation on the subject) of me. Because she was here with me. Because I had her in ways that he couldn't have. That she was "forced" to be with me because of the kids...etc... How is it absurd that people are jealous in these situations? Both are 'after' the same thing. That's the very BASIS of jealousy. Link to post Share on other sites
Gwyneth Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 I'm sure there is jealousy, but I don't like to use the word--I think it's evil and sinful. I just don't understand how jealousy can brew from such an awful situation. That's the point I was making as the OP. In your case, Owl, I can kind of understand. But then again, why would you be jealous of a man who your wife was cheating on you with? I guess I can say I view jealousy as worshipping--we are jealous of someone because we want to be that person or / and what they have. In this case, do we want to be the other person in these scenarios? As the BS, would we really want to be the OP destroying a marriage? Is that something to really be jealous of? I don't think so. As the OW, do we really want to be in the BS's shoes? I don't really think so. I think more appropriate words would be angry, mad, p'd off, hate...and so forth. But thisi s just MO. I think Jealous is misused. But I'm not a linguistics major. Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Think about it...in a way, we DO want to "be that person". The BS wants to be the person that's getting all the love, attention, etc...from the WS. They were that person before, and they want to be that person again. They want what the OP has(that the BS used to have). The OP wants to be the person(in the majority of cases) married to and living with the WS. They want what the BS has(had). Its that whole "coveting" thing...that's the sinful aspect of it all. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 (edited) Sure, she has the right to say anything she wants to say--we all have that right. Is it acceptable? No. It's Never acceptable to say bad things about Anyone no matter whom they are (including the President of the US...). I believe name calling is a sin, but we are entitled to our own thoughts and opinions. I completely agree that everyone is welcome to their opinions and I find it interesting that you think name calling is a sin. It may be hurtful or vindictive, but a sin? I teach my children to ignore name calling. Most of the time when people resort to name calling it's because of jealousy. Is jealous a sin. I don't know, maybe it is. In my opinion there are many sins that we converse about on this sight, but I don't consider name calling to be anywhere on the list. Just my opinion. Also, I think it's a sin to keep something "bad" a secret if keeping that secret hurts someone else. It's not a sin to say something bad if it's true and that truth helps others make better decisions for their own lives. Edited March 20, 2008 by herenow Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 I'm sure there is jealousy, but I don't like to use the word--I think it's evil and sinful. I just don't understand how jealousy can brew from such an awful situation. That's the point I was making as the OP. In your case, Owl, I can kind of understand. But then again, why would you be jealous of a man who your wife was cheating on you with? Sorry, I didn't read this before I posted my last post. So, you do think jealousy is not only a sin but it's evil. I'm almost speechless on how to respond to that. I come to this forum to get life perspectives from others. I love to know how people think especially ones that I may not agree with. But I have to say that Gwyneth's idea of what a sin is fascinates me. Link to post Share on other sites
Gwyneth Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 I completely agree that everyone is welcome to their opinions and I find it interesting that you think name calling is a sin. It may be hurtful or vindictive, but a sin? I teach my children to ignore name calling. Most of the time when people resort to name calling it's because of jealousy. Is jealous a sin. I don't know, maybe it is. In my opinion there are many sins that we converse about on this sight, but I don't consider name calling to be anywhere on the list. Just my opinion. Also, I think it's a sin to keep something "bad" a secret if keeping that secret hurts someone else. It's not a sin to say something bad if it's true and that truth helps others make better decisions for their own lives. I taught Sunday school for Many years and we taught the kids name calling was a sin. Yes, lying as well (even white lies I suppose). So are many other things we innocently do on a daily basis--read the horoscope, gamble, play the lottery, curse, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Gwyneth Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Sorry, I didn't read this before I posted my last post. So, you do think jealousy is not only a sin but it's evil. I'm almost speechless on how to respond to that. I come to this forum to get life perspectives from others. I love to know how people think especially ones that I may not agree with. But I have to say that Gwyneth's idea of what a sin is fascinates me. Yes. Again, back to teaching Sunday School, we teach the kids that jealousy is a sin. Aren't sinful doings evil? Well this is my opinion. I don't like the word, never had, and my mother taught me to Never use the word jealousy because it brings evilness. I guess she has brainwashed me from an early age... Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Yes. Again, back to teaching Sunday School, we teach the kids that jealousy is a sin. Aren't sinful doings evil? Well this is my opinion. I don't like the word, never had, and my mother taught me to Never use the word jealousy because it brings evilness. I guess she has brainwashed me from an early age... You and I will just have to agree to disagree on what we think are sins what we find to be evil. I think jealousy is a human reaction that we all have at one point in our lives. Does that make us all evil? I hope not, but maybe I'm wrong. I just can't get over the fact (forgive me if this sounds like bashing but I can't think of any other way to say it) that a woman who is pregnant with a MM's baby thinks that name calling and jealousy are sins and even evil. Can't wrap my head around that one. If you could shed some light on this Gwyneth, I'm truly interested and as I said fascinated by you. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Sorry for the thread jack, back to the OP. I think it's a reflection on the kind of person she is. I agree with the posters that say she is trying to shed negative light on you. In reality people who do that tend to look bad themselves. If your BF continues to listen to her dribble, he isn't someone that you can trust with your feelings. Link to post Share on other sites
Gwyneth Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 You and I will just have to agree to disagree on what we think are sins what we find to be evil. I think jealousy is a human reaction that we all have at one point in our lives. Does that make us all evil? I hope not, but maybe I'm wrong. I just can't get over the fact (forgive me if this sounds like bashing but I can't think of any other way to say it) that a woman who is pregnant with a MM's baby thinks that name calling and jealousy are sins and even evil. Can't wrap my head around that one. If you could shed some light on this Gwyneth, I'm truly interested and as I said fascinated by you. I guess a Thank You is in order for your facination with me? I did say it's sinful that I am pregnant with a MM's baby--maybe not in this thread, but somewhere around here I did. I never said it's right. I don't care to agree or disagree with your opinion of what jealousy is and sins are because they are your opinions. I just don't like the word jealousy. I don't like being accused of being jealous, and I certainly have never liked when I was told someone was jealous of me. Just don't like it And why are you facinated by me? Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 I guess a Thank You is in order for your fascination with me? I did say it's sinful that I am pregnant with a MM's baby--maybe not in this thread, but somewhere around here I did. I never said it's right. I don't care to agree or disagree with your opinion of what jealousy is and sins are because they are your opinions. I just don't like the word jealousy. I don't like being accused of being jealous, and I certainly have never liked when I was told someone was jealous of me. Just don't like it And why are you fascinated by me? Honestly, your story sounds oddly familiar to me. Kind of like a mesh of a lot of other posts I have read since I've been here. I'm not saying your story isn't real, I just find it fascinating. It's almost like I've seen the movie. Deja Va if you will. Maybe fascinating is the wrong word. Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Sorry, I didn't read this before I posted my last post. So, you do think jealousy is not only a sin but it's evil. I'm almost speechless on how to respond to that. I come to this forum to get life perspectives from others. I love to know how people think especially ones that I may not agree with. But I have to say that Gwyneth's idea of what a sin is fascinates me. Sorry to step into this one... but even though it is not listed as one of the 7 deadly sins- jealousy(which is a basic emotion) in its biblical term is considered a sin. Besides, jealousy derives from ENVY- which IS one of the 7 deadly sins which in the religious world makes it evil. Link to post Share on other sites
Gwyneth Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Honestly, your story sounds oddly familiar to me. Kind of like a mesh of a lot of other posts I have read since I've been here. I'm not saying your story isn't real, I just find it fascinating. It's almost like I've seen the movie. Deja Va if you will. Maybe fascinating is the wrong word. Maybe you mean appalling? Yeah, I can relate to many around here. I guess we all can. Somehow or another, our Lives tend to relate as we are in the same situations. It's not my story, it's my life. If you think my life is appalling, you should meet some of my friends Link to post Share on other sites
Gwyneth Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Sorry to step into this one... but even though it is not listed as one of the 7 deadly sins- jealousy(which is a basic emotion) in its biblical term is considered a sin. Besides, jealousy derives from ENVY- which IS one of the 7 deadly sins which in the religious world makes it evil. Does this mean you and I actually agree on something??? Now I'm appalled by this! Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 You and I will just have to agree to disagree on what we think are sins what we find to be evil. I think jealousy is a human reaction that we all have at one point in our lives. Does that make us all evil? I hope not, but maybe I'm wrong. I just can't get over the fact (forgive me if this sounds like bashing but I can't think of any other way to say it) that a woman who is pregnant with a MM's baby thinks that name calling and jealousy are sins and even evil. Can't wrap my head around that one. If you could shed some light on this Gwyneth, I'm truly interested and as I said fascinated by you. Does that make us all evil? show me one person that is "God Like" and then we can answer that. LOL! If you are not a "faith walker" then of course none of this is going to make sense. There are principles with any religion that are to be followed if you are to practice it... Anyhow, I agree with you but let's not cast stones now because one thing that we shall all agree is that we are ALL SINNERS! Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 WTF!? So your saying that while he's screwing her co-worker, as long as they don't say mean things about her he CAN be trusted with her feelings? He's f'ing her co-worker. She knows it. He KNOWS she knows it. She allows it. Of course they're going to disrespect her in other ways. Why stop at cheating? You are absolutely 100% correct. I was just answering the question she was asking. But I couldn't agree with you more. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Sorry to step into this one... but even though it is not listed as one of the 7 deadly sins- jealousy(which is a basic emotion) in its biblical term is considered a sin. Besides, jealousy derives from ENVY- which IS one of the 7 deadly sins which in the religious world makes it evil. Like I said in my post, maybe it is a sin, I don't know. Thanks for clearing it up for me. Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Does this mean you and I actually agree on something??? Now I'm appalled by this! This is true... LOL! Religion is a touchy issue but to the fortune of many the "world" has been left with enough data to debate about. Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Like I said in my post, maybe it is a sin, I don't know. Thanks for clearing it up for me. You're welcome Senorita. I service one sinner at a time. LOL! Jk! Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Does that make us all evil? show me one person that is "God Like" and then we can answer that. LOL! If you are not a "faith walker" then of course none of this is going to make sense. There are principles with any religion that are to be followed if you are to practice it... Anyhow, I agree with you but let's not cast stones now because one thing that we shall all agree is that we are ALL SINNERS! OK, I'm fine with that. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Maybe you mean appalling? Yeah, I can relate to many around here. I guess we all can. Somehow or another, our Lives tend to relate as we are in the same situations. It's not my story, it's my life. If you think my life is appalling, you should meet some of my friends I never said that and i didn't imply it either. Please don't put words into my mouth. You use the word appalling and then you try to make it be a sentiment that I have. I could possibly find that kind of thinking appalling, but I still think it's too strong of a word. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 You're welcome Senorita. I service one sinner at a time. LOL! Jk! I still think being a sinner because of feeling the human emotion of jealousy, is not in itself evil, But that's for another thread. Link to post Share on other sites
Gwyneth Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 I never said that and i didn't imply it either. Please don't put words into my mouth. You use the word appalling and then you try to make it be a sentiment that I have. I could possibly find that kind of thinking appalling, but I still think it's too strong of a word. What are you talking about? Put what words into your mouth? Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 What are you talking about? Put what words into your mouth? Were you not talking to me when you said this? "if you think my life is appalling, you should meet some of my friends" Seems you were since you quoted my post. I never said your life was appalling, so please don't say I did. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 Just when I was getting some good religious education, I have to go to work. See ya later folks, have a great day! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts