MayDay Posted March 28, 2008 Share Posted March 28, 2008 Before I get into who has done what, if you TRY to cheat, but it doesn't happen, is that still cheating? Is that crossing the line? For example, say you invite someone into your hotel room or bedroom and they refuse. Is it still considered cheating or crossing the line? Luv ta know.... Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted March 28, 2008 Share Posted March 28, 2008 I would say that once the intent is there and you attempt to act on it, regardless of what transpired - yes, it is cheating. It might be a lesser degree of it but it still is. The only thing that stopped it was that the OP backed out. Chances are, if they got away with it, they will simply try to cheat again at a later date. Link to post Share on other sites
Lookingforward Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 I'd have to agree - the only reason you didn't go through with your cheating was the other person wouldn't play along. Link to post Share on other sites
Shellz937 Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 It's close to cheating but if the intent is there they are going to do it again. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 Tell your spouse/SO about the request and result and get the opinion that matters Link to post Share on other sites
Fun2BMe Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 I don't think it is. If someone comes to your hotel room who you were planning on killing, but for whatever reason you end up not killing them, you wouldn't be guilty of murder. Same with your scenerio. But crossing the line? Definitely! I would definitely say that is grounds for breaking up. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MayDay Posted March 29, 2008 Author Share Posted March 29, 2008 Well, to be clear, this wasn't me. Fun2BeMe, you have a certain point, but the intent is still there, right? I mean, if the murderer still WANTS to do it, but was only foiled, that says much about his self. Don t you think? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 if you TRY to cheat, but it doesn't happen, is that still cheating? Is that crossing the line? Your intention to cheat was there, so technically speaking I would say you have cheating on your mind which you want to put into action even though "it" didn't happen, it is cheating. For example, say you invite someone into your hotel room or bedroom and they refuse. Your intention to cheat was there. If that person had come to your hotel room, you would have cheated, yes? Is it still considered cheating or crossing the line? Definately crossing the line and once again, with the intention of cheating in your mind. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MayDay Posted March 29, 2008 Author Share Posted March 29, 2008 I agree whichway! I think the bastard is a cheater and probably has done it in the past! Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 Practice makes perfect Link to post Share on other sites
SoleMate Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 If you plan to murder someone, and you take concrete steps to accomplish your goal, like shooting at him but missing, you have committed the serious crime of attempted murder. It is punished somewhat less harshly than actual murder, because even though your heart was in the wrong place, no actual harm ensued. If you plan to cheat (i.e. have sexual relations outside your relationship), and you take concrete steps to accomplish your goal, like inviting a desired sex partner to a hotel room, you have committed the relationship "crime" of attempted cheating. The punishment will be up to your spouse/SO and I'd definitely advocate for having it be somewhat less harsh than for "completed" cheating. That was an easy one. Link to post Share on other sites
Starla Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 yes, it is cheating. you (hypothetical you) have cheated in your heart and in your mind. Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 yes, it is cheating. you (hypothetical you) have cheated in your heart and in your mind. If you went to your spouse, mate, SO, partner, whatever and said, "Last night I invited a memberf of the opposite sex to my hotel room with every intention of having sex with them but they didn't show up so I didn't cheat on you," do you think they would be OK with that? If they would, I think they'd be desperate and needy. It's cheating! Link to post Share on other sites
Starla Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 hi curmudgeon - i was walking through town one day and this guy came up to me...saying i was gorgeous (vomit) and would i think about going to a hotel room!!:mad: well, after giving him short shrift and sending him packing, i was left thinking what a total and utter creep!!! i feel sure he had a wife or girlfriend (why a hotel room if not?) and i felt so sorry for her, to be stuck with a cheating thing like that for a boyfriend/hubby!! if the intention is there, that's all that counts. it's cheating! Link to post Share on other sites
witabix Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 You see these people all around you. Men and women are no different. My husband doesn't understand me blah blah....... Heard that one in an unlit public toilet from a woman who followed me in there!! I always feel sorry for the people who feel the need to do this kind of thing, I don't get it, can they not see how they are portraying themselves? Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 Hello back, Starla. The shere audacity of some people absolutely amazes me. So, too, do the excuses they make for themselves to excuse their unacceptable behavior. Even more astounding are those who make the excuses for them. That tells me the latter also indulge in the same, licentious, hedonistic behavior with no regard for their existing relationships. As always, just one man's opinion, and it mught just be that I'm getting old! Link to post Share on other sites
Starla Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 You see these people all around you. Men and women are no different. My husband doesn't understand me blah blah....... Heard that one in an unlit public toilet from a woman who followed me in there!! I always feel sorry for the people who feel the need to do this kind of thing, I don't get it, can they not see how they are portraying themselves? yip - me too. i always feel for the husband/wife stuck at home!! curmudgeon - i can't believe either the brass neck on some people. i wonder where their dignity is, to go about seeking sex with random people. they must have no real self respect. Link to post Share on other sites
Fun2BMe Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 If you plan to murder someone, and you take concrete steps to accomplish your goal, like shooting at him but missing, you have committed the serious crime of attempted murder. It is punished somewhat less harshly than actual murder, because even though your heart was in the wrong place, no actual harm ensued. If you plan to cheat (i.e. have sexual relations outside your relationship), and you take concrete steps to accomplish your goal, like inviting a desired sex partner to a hotel room, you have committed the relationship "crime" of attempted cheating. The punishment will be up to your spouse/SO and I'd definitely advocate for having it be somewhat less harsh than for "completed" cheating. That was an easy one. I will have to agree with this. I was actually thinking about "attempted murder" charges but wasn't sure if attempting was punishable. But it's definitely not in the seame category as having completed the act FOR WHATEVER reasosn. Another example would be if a woman is 8 months pregnant then miscarries, she can never say she has given birth, even though she was 'that' close and she had 100% intention to! Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 Another example would be if a woman is 8 months pregnant then miscarries, she can never say she has given birth, even though she was 'that' close and she had 100% intention to! That would be considered a stillbirth. This past year I was instrumental in pushing through legislation in my state that accords women who have a stillbirth in which a fetal death olccurs after the fetus has advanced to or beyond the 20th week of uterogestation a Certificate of Still Birth. Prior to this law, all the parents received was a death certificate and the requirement to bury or cremate the baby. That gave them no closure or acknowledgement that there ever had been a baby born, still or not. Many go full term yet don't draw a breath. The bill enacted the Missing Angels Act. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts