Do most men like bubbly women?

[Nevermind]

Are you talking to me, TBF?

 

I don't dislike them.

[Star Gazer]

Dislike driven by envy, will slowly kill you. Why not focus on things that make you happy and dispose of the baggage, that drags you down?

 

Brilliant!!! You sure you're not the Dalai Lama?

[Star Gazer]

However, how deep and insightful is it to judge another women simply by observing her for a short time? I am assuming that you did not observe a bubbly woman's life for a longer period. Correct me if I am wrong.

 

Well unless you know a person very well, you cannot judge how fake or real they are and how their view of the world is. A woman, you'd describe bubbly, might be deeper and more insightful than many people you know.

 

Your view of the world is right - for you. This doesn't mean that any other is fake. If anybody feels happy most of the time and is able to express this happiness...well, I envy them. Because...through some years of depression and a lot of angst, I finally understand that being happy doesn't mean you don't see or ignore the bad things, it means that you can see the good things, too.

 

In love, as in every aspect of our lives, we seek happiness and therefore it is not surprising that both men and women are drawn to happy people.

 

I couldn't agree more, NM!

[Storyrider]

That is called flirting!

 

You enjoyed that because you were tearing down the other women in front of the guy.

 

Do you see what I'm saying?

 

Well, this guy is observant and sarcastic, is artsy, likes alternative music, reads seriously, so we just tend to gravitate towards each other. He's the kind of person I would choose to be friends with, but like almost all the people I have exposure to, I met him through our kids. It is rare that I meet someone that way who I actually have much in common with, so it is a pleasure to talk to him. But I'm friends with his wife, too because she is the same.

 

We had to be at this event because our children wanted to be there, so we were trying to make the best of it by entertaining each other. I wouldn't say there is a 0% flirting factor because that would probably be dishonest.

 

But I just saw him at the park on a play date the other day, and we were talking about Bob Dylan and Brian Eno and Jack Kerouac and William S. Burroughs and Alan Ginsberg. He was telling me he heard Alan Ginsberg read "Howl" at a local bar in the early 80s.

 

If I tried to discuss any of those things with most of the other moms, they would look at me like I have two heads.

 

They like to discuss: their kids' soccer teams, their kids' teachers, celebrities, the vacations they're going on, where they get their haircuts and their eyebrows waxed and their pedicures, fights with their MILs, husbands, etc. That stuff is fine too, but it is good to have a plan B when it gets old.

 

Not to speak for Story, but I can imagine having the same kind of conversation with anyone, woman or man, so long as they felt the same way about it. Wouldn't much matter who, only that they agreed with me and made me feel like I'm not the only person with a particular perspective in the room. Bonding. Finding your peeps, you know?

 

Right, totally agree.

 

I did actually dance with my daughter a bit, too. She taught me the Hamster Dance.

[Trialbyfire]

Are you talking to me, TBF?

 

I don't dislike them.

No, it was just a general comment to add to the thread.

 

Brilliant!!! You sure you're not the Dalai Lama?

Haha...do I look exiled?

[Lizzie60]

Hum.. I didn't read the whole thread.. but from the subject line.. I would have to say that I also don't like 'bubbly people' male or female.. they get on my nerves...

 

If a guy is overly bubbly.. it's a huge turn-off..

[Storyrider]

*clap, clap*

Is that the sound of one hand clapping, oh wise one?

 

Because I'm reading about introversion right now, I can't help but think this as a factor in what Shadowplay is saying.

 

Introverts often don't see the point of small talk. They don't want to cultivate "light" friendships because they find dealing with lots of acquaintences draining on the energy they need to get through the day. They don't speak quickly in party situations because they tend to process and analyze their thoughts in more detail before responding. Extroverts often talk over them or interrupt them because of the difference in communication styles. And introverts tend to be lower-energy people in the first place.

 

For these reasons, introverts can sometimes feel wary of extroverts.

[Trialbyfire]

Is that the sound of one hand clapping, oh wise one?

If only one hand claps in a forest full of two hands, is it really considered clapping? Oooommmm...

 

I can see why introverts can feel overwhelmed by extroverts but should people, regardless of "vert" type, denigrate the other by making mass assumptions without making individualized judgement calls? I dunno...

[Cov]

Hum.. I didn't read the whole thread.. but from the subject line.. I would have to say that I also don't like 'bubbly people' male or female.. they get on my nerves...

 

If a guy is overly bubbly.. it's a huge turn-off..

 

 

I like people who have loads of different sides to their personality. They are rare, but I have branded just that. I've been called Stalin, Hitler, Franco, Mussolini, Kurt Cobain, Courtney Love and that Geeky lead singer from Weezer and not to mention Tom Green.

[Cobra_X30]

Dislike driven by envy, will slowly kill you. Why not focus on things that make you happy and dispose of the baggage, that drags you down?

 

Could not have said that better myself!

 

We had to be at this event because our children wanted to be there, so we were trying to make the best of it by entertaining each other. I wouldn't say there is a 0% flirting factor because that would probably be dishonest.

 

But I just saw him at the park on a play date the other day, and we were talking about Bob Dylan and Brian Eno and Jack Kerouac and William S. Burroughs and Alan Ginsberg. He was telling me he heard Alan Ginsberg read "Howl" at a local bar in the early 80s. If I tried to discuss any of those things with most of the other moms, they would look at me like I have two heads.

 

I should have stated in my previous post that I was assuming that this was non-sexual flirting.

 

However, I can totally see that your right. Not many people would want to talk about those guys. Most of them are well beyond the point of cultural relevance.

 

My overall point was that it's not that the other mom's are bubbly fakes, or that your better than they are... it's just that your different.

[TheFonz]

I can see why introverts can feel overwhelmed by extroverts but should people, regardless of "vert" type, denigrate the other by making mass assumptions without making individualized judgement calls? I dunno...

 

 

Yeah but extroverts often times don't get or understand introverts. For example most extroverted girls will automatically consider an introverted guy as unconfident or "creepy". What's worse about extroverts is they can be quite phony, i.e. smiling to your face and then stabbing you in the back. An extrovert since thre more outgoing wil tell the whole world what a crummy person and introvert is, but the introvert even if they thought that about someone lse would probably tell few or no one. Extroverts can be dangerous people.

[Storyrider]

However, I can totally see that your right. Not many people would want to talk about those guys. Most of them are well beyond the point of cultural relevance.

 

:laugh: I'm not culturally relevant either, so there you have it.

[Cherry Blossom 35]

Yeah but extroverts often times don't get or understand introverts. For example most extroverted girls will automatically consider an introverted guy as unconfident or "creepy". What's worse about extroverts is they can be quite phony, i.e. smiling to your face and then stabbing you in the back. An extrovert since thre more outgoing wil tell the whole world what a crummy person and introvert is, but the introvert even if they thought that about someone lse would probably tell few or no one. Extroverts can be dangerous people.

 

It amazes me how many people feel so threatened by outgoing people. Since there are more people who self-identify as extroverts, that's a lot of "dangerous" folks out there! Seriously, I'm about as extoverted as they come and I don't understand how that translates to being a back-stabber.

[Trialbyfire]

Could not have said that better myself!

Coming from you, that's a substantial compliment indeed!

Yeah but extroverts often times don't get or understand introverts. For example most extroverted girls will automatically consider an introverted guy as unconfident or "creepy". What's worse about extroverts is they can be quite phony, i.e. smiling to your face and then stabbing you in the back. An extrovert since thre more outgoing wil tell the whole world what a crummy person and introvert is, but the introvert even if they thought that about someone lse would probably tell few or no one. Extroverts can be dangerous people.

How introverted is the introverted type, you're referring to? If you can't get a word out of an introvert, it's difficult to gauge what's going on in their mind. If an extremely introverted person likes or dislikes you, how will you ever know?

 

As for extroverts being dangerous, if you look at the high school shootings, they've all been introverted types. Emotions hidden or suppressed, sometimes explodes in frightening ways.

[TheFonz]

It amazes me how many people feel so threatened by outgoing people. Since there are more people who self-identify as extroverts, that's a lot of "dangerous" folks out there! Seriously, I'm about as extoverted as they come and I don't understand how that translates to being a back-stabber.

 

It's simple introverts are a disliked and discriminated against minority. Why are some points so hard for you to grasp?

[TheFonz]

Coming from you, that's a substantial compliment indeed!

 

How introverted is the introverted type, you're referring to? If you can't get a word out of an introvert, it's difficult to gauge what's going on in their mind. If an extremely introverted person likes or dislikes you, how will you ever know?

 

 

Well that's probably a big part of the reason extroverts feel threatened by introverts. Short of a introvert saying, "Gee, I like you", extroverts don't don't get introverts and vice versa. I can be extraverted or introverted by choice, but I'm just skilled like that.

 

As for extroverts being dangerous, if you look at the high school shootings, they've all been introverted types. Emotions hidden or suppressed, sometimes explodes in frightening ways.

 

See you're already casting dispersion on introverts . But these people usually are severely picked on for several years in school. Their retaliation is more of evidence of how introverts are missed treatd by "extroverts" than evidence that introverts are prone to violence. There's many more violent extroverted people anyway.

[Cherry Blossom 35]

It's simple introverts are a disliked and discriminated against minority. Why are some points so hard for you to grasp?

 

While it is true that many people who identify as introverts are misunderstood. I do get that, and it is unfair, I agree. There are people who don't take the chance to get to know people who are a little more quiet/introspective. that is their loss, because they may be missing out on getting to know some great people. But please tell me, how does it help to make such gross generalizations about extroverts? Doesn't that also qualify as typecasting/misunderstanding a whole class of people?

[TheFonz]

While it is true that many people who identify as introverts are misunderstood. I do get that, and it is unfair, I agree. There are people who don't take the chance to get to know people who are a little more quiet/introspective. that is their loss, because they may be missing out on getting to know some great people. But please tell me, how does it help to make such gross generalizations about extroverts? Doesn't that also qualify as typecasting/misunderstanding a whole class of people?

 

what's wrong with a generalization? Don't you know what a generalization is? It's something that has been shown to be generally true. I never said all extroverts are hostile too introverts, my point was just a few extroverts who are hostile can really spread a lot more gossip. I never said all extroverts don't get introverts, but It is true that few do.

[Trialbyfire]

Well that's probably a big part of the reason extroverts feel threatened by introverts. Short of a introvert saying, "Gee, I like you", extroverts don't don't get introverts and vice versa. I can be extraverted or introverted by choice, but I'm just skilled like that.

I think most people sit somewhere between. Myself, it's reliant on how I feel as at that point in time, whether I feel like being social or feel like needing my own space.

 

See you're already casting dispersion on introverts . But these people usually are severely picked on for several years in school. Their retaliation is more of evidence of how introverts are missed treatd by "extroverts" than evidence that introverts are prone to violence. There's many more violent extroverted people anyway.

People can continue acting the part of the victim and cry about their experiences, or they can pick themselves up and say, "Hey, I want to be like...this, so I'm going to change because I'm unhappy with myself", as opposed to saying "Hey, you suck because you're not like me".

[Cobra_X30]

Coming from you, that's a substantial compliment indeed!

 

How introverted is the introverted type, you're referring to? If you can't get a word out of an introvert, it's difficult to gauge what's going on in their mind. If an extremely introverted person likes or dislikes you, how will you ever know? As for extroverts being dangerous, if you look at the high school shootings, they've all been introverted types. Emotions hidden or suppressed, sometimes explodes in frightening ways.

 

That's exactly it! Introverts and Extroverts exist on a sliding scale. Some being more withdrawn than others.

 

I've actually seen people use both extremes as emotional defense mechanisms. I think that is what makes people dangerous. You have Intros like the VT shooter, and Extros who are mean and aggressive like that Columbine shooter.

 

It's simple introverts are a disliked and discriminated against minority. Why are some points so hard for you to grasp?

 

This needs an example, otherwise it comes across as your meaningless opinion.

[Cherry Blossom 35]

what's wrong with a generalization? Don't you know what a generalization is? It's something that has been shown to be generally true. I never said all extroverts are hostile too introverts, my point was just a few extroverts who are hostile can really spread a lot more gossip. I never said all extroverts don't get introverts, but It is true that few do.

 

Thank you, yes I do know what a generalization is.

 

I guess I just disagree with you that most extroverts are back-stabbers, etc. I know many, many people who are quite outgoing, bubbly, fun, whatever who do not display some of the very negative traits you have described.

[TheFonz]

Thank you, yes I do know what a generalization is.

 

I guess I just disagree with you that most extroverts are back-stabbers, etc. I know many, many people who are quite outgoing, bubbly, fun, whatever who do not display some of the very negative traits you have described.

 

 

You keep changing what I say. I said introverts and extroverts don't get each other. There's more extroverts and it only takes one extrovert to run someone down to everyone. Besides, you're an extrovert so I doubt you can speak for what these people do to intoverts. You are biased .

[TheFonz]

 

 

This needs an example, otherwise it comes across as your meaningless opinion.

 

Introverts are 25% of the population or something. Extroverts don't get introverts. If you never been to a party or in HS or any other situation and haven't see introverts excluded, then I don't know what to tell you. I don't exclude introverts just like not everyone excludes say black people, but that's not true for everyone.

[Cobra_X30]

You keep changing what I say. I said introverts and extroverts don't get each other. There's more extroverts and it only takes one extrovert to run someone down to everyone. Besides, you're an extrovert so I doubt you can speak for what these people do to intoverts. You are biased .

 

No, TBF was right! Most people are a mix of both... and it's very situational!

 

So, I think your pretty much wrong about this.

[TheFonz]

No, TBF was right! Most people are a mix of both... and it's very situational!

 

So, I think your pretty much wrong about this.

 

 

Go look this up. Roughly half of the pop is both, but that's not introverts. Introverts are about 25% of the population. So 75% of the population is more extraverted then an introvert. Introverts are generally more accepting of extraverts its just they need down time/alone time.