My boyfriend an ex-SCHIZOPHRENIA

[Mary3]

I am bipolar, my mother is borderline, and I have known many others with different disorders. . .so I've seen plenty. And you say "taking meds for the rest of your life" like its a horrible thing. People with heart conditions or high blood pressure have to do the same thing. . . .

 

Hmm, Scizophrenia is different than bipolar. Much different, and I agree that if you have Scizophrenia and you want a child you MUST take your meds, and have a loving spouse to MAKE you take your meds if you try to stop. . . .

 

I'm hurt(and I'll continue to say this) because of the obvious sterotype people place on those with emotional disabilities or disorders. I would ask if you KNOW anyone who is bipolar. Most people don't admit they are to STRANGERS because of the reactions they get. (Maybe something like a perosn they don't know telling them they should rethink being a parent) I don't care who knows I'm bipolar. My Fiance knows, and IS very supportive. He IS willing to pick me up when I fall and be with me through everything. . . But then again, I always thought ANY partner should be like that. I told him right away about me being bipolar because anyone close to me deserves to know.

 

But I digress.

 

There ARE people who are Scizophrenic, and even those who are Bipolar who will NEVER be able to care for themselves much less a child. But there are many who can. All I'm saying is DON'T JUDGE UNLESS YOU KNOW.

 

Its not bad to break up with someone because they have a disorder. Its perfectly fine. I couldn't be with just any man. And most men couldn't deal with me. (more because I'm opinionated and like to razz people than anything else. Haha) My fiance understands my ins and outs and is fine with them. But that is the same with ANY relationship. Everyone has "things" or "quirks" that could make or break a relationship. . .

 

Grrr. . . It just frustrates me when all the focus is put on the disability. I have helped raise TWO children. They were my niece and nephew. I raised my niece from birth to age seven. My sisters were not bipolar, nor had any mental illness to be seen. They simply didn't take care of thier children. They were interested in thier love lives and everything else. I was the youngest, but I did what needed to be done for the kids. I helped raise both children, and taught them both to read. When they were upset, they didn't run to thier parents, they came to me. The bipolar woman. You know why? Because I was more "Reliable." Not exactly a word that goes with bipolar.

 

 

*sighs* Well, I guess I'm ranting now. It just saddens me. Maybe my kids WILL have an emotional disability. That won't lessen them, or make them unlovable. But it does worry me that there are people out there who won't understand, or care to.

 

I guess this is a losing battle.

If someone isn't stable, whether or not they have a DIAGNOSIS, don't stay with them. If you don't feel safe or comfortable, don't stay with them. . .

 

But if you're happy, and stable, and have trust and honesty between you. . .

 

Don't leave them just because of thier diagnosis.

 

I never said it was a horrible thing to * take meds the rest of your life * There is nothing horrible about that. What is horrible is NOT taking your medications and having an episode. Medication is NECESSARY , not a big bad evil thing. Some people have high blood pressure and its necessary to take their meds. Some have diabetes. Necessary again. Many diseases are controlled by medication.

 

SP and Bi polar each are individual in their own rights. I am not saying they are the same. I am saying they are SERIOUS illnesses and should be addressed accordingly.

 

Who is stereotyping here ??? I see alot of great advice . Who knows a bi~polar person you ask ?? I do. Who knows a SP ?? I do. Both very close to , one a friend ( SP ) and the other was someone I was seeing ( bi~Polar )

 

Not everyone will admit to their SP or their BP. You have decided to take the road of honesty , straight up front with your bf, and tell him about your BP. He loves you and supports you. You are blessed ! That has to be real love for him to stand by you.

 

I am not judging . I DO know. I wish to God I didn't know and how I lost my best friend to this SP.

 

ANY relationship can have difficulties in dealing with someone. And they dont have to have SP or BP. Someone could be a heavy drinker and the spouse deals with that.

 

I am very proud of you for stepping up to raise those kids. You have obviously done a great job.

 

We are not focusing on mental illness. We are addressing a question as to whether someone can be an * ex SP *?? The answer is NO.

 

And from that a spinoff of where you are today here.

 

Should you have a house full of kids and live a happy life . Absolutely. All I ever said was to consult your doctor and ask him the same question.