MikeCosseva Posted May 26, 2008 Share Posted May 26, 2008 Sal I guess you're right in a sense. You ask why would I get involved with a loser like that? It's probably the hormones. Maybe I feel she is getting married for the wrong reasons if she is interested in me. Maybe pushing 30 is making her desperate and she sees marriage as this dream that she has to accomplish before she gets too old regardless if it's with the right person. Or maybe all this is just crazy talk from me. I saw her today. We didn't get to talk much because we were both soo busy. After work I saw her by herself and I was about to approach her but she seemed kind of sad and in her own world so I backed off and disappeared. There's always tomorrow. Link to post Share on other sites
shakenandstirred Posted May 26, 2008 Share Posted May 26, 2008 I would suggest leaving her alone. I could ask you why would you want to mess with an engaged woman, but I already know the answer. Would you want to be her fiance and find out that she cheated on you, because a guy like you, preyed upon her pre wedding jitters and insecurities. You will be no better than the other OM scum that knowing do this for their own satisfaction. She's hot, she's beautiful, she excites you, but she's also engaged. To a man with morals this means off-limits, regardless if she flirts or not. She could be just flirting to assure she still has it before she finally commits. Do yourself a favor and be mature and let this go, instead of acting like a teenager trying to score Link to post Share on other sites
Author MikeCosseva Posted May 27, 2008 Author Share Posted May 27, 2008 I have good news for the folks telling me to back off, she wanted little to do with me today. She had a huge chip on her shoulder while I was trying to just have a conversation with her. She currently has a lot of issues happening at work, she is being monitored for her improper interaction with customers and clients. But its funny how I am making jokes that even the people I do not get along with are laughing to while she pretends I don't even exist. She may be doing to me what I have done to her a few times , ignoring the advances of the other. I guess it was meant to be this way. I still just want to be her friend since we are in the same workgroup but she is not even giving me that right now. She may have given up on trying to chase me. I just have a feeling that she is going to come back with a vengeance when I least expect it. Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 I have good news for the folks telling me to back off, she wanted little to do with me today. She had a huge chip on her shoulder while I was trying to just have a conversation with her. She currently has a lot of issues happening at work, she is being monitored for her improper interaction with customers and clients. But its funny how I am making jokes that even the people I do not get along with are laughing to while she pretends I don't even exist. She may be doing to me what I have done to her a few times , ignoring the advances of the other. I guess it was meant to be this way. I still just want to be her friend since we are in the same workgroup but she is not even giving me that right now. She may have given up on trying to chase me. I just have a feeling that she is going to come back with a vengeance when I least expect it. She's probably just an attention 'ho'. Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Ah, the difference is that on the OW/OM forum you hear mainly WOMEN venting their heartbreak after giving sex. It's not very often you hear a man complain "All she does is screw my brains out. Boo hoo" Actually, for the man the corresponding heartbreaking situation is NOT getting any sex and only being a "friend". Actually I hear a lot of post-coital boo-hoo's from both genders. And from the sounds of it- the OP has feelings that go a bit beyond the sexual... sounds like a crush to me. That's not something worth playing around with if she's going to be getting married. Sex for sex's sake is fine. Banging someone about to be married you have feelings for- may not be a great choice in a sexual partner. She doesn't sound like much more then a tease anyway... Link to post Share on other sites
Author MikeCosseva Posted May 27, 2008 Author Share Posted May 27, 2008 yeah I was developing a crush especially when she was giving me all that attention by being girly girly. I'll keep you guys posted if I get any surprises. Link to post Share on other sites
Shades Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Don't bother, that is bad Karma. You don't need to be that guy ever. Have some repect for yourself, and man think about how bad she is to be doing this to a guy she is about to Marry. Imagine you were her future husband, and if you could still do it, than no need to finish this sentence. Link to post Share on other sites
BentSpine Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 MikeCosseva, you're doing the guy a favour: Her heart is clearly not with him if she's acting single when you're around. Hopefully her behaviour will make her realise this fact and let him go find someone who is into him the way he, the way anyone, deserves. In every case, he doesn't have this woman's heart. Imagine what a nightmare if would be to be legally tied up with someone who doesn't love you. Link to post Share on other sites
SpikeyChick Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 Of course you don't see that now. When you are indifferent to her you'll see it quite clearly. An "attention whore" isn't necessarily a "whore" who sleeps around. Most of the time they are the ones who don't technically cheat on their boyfriends or husbands' date=' but do everything in their power to make other men want them and fall in love with them. They thrive on that. Sex is usually the the [i']last card[/i] they play to make sure they get what they want, because it isn't sex they want. Its attention. Your full, undivided attention. Of course, it won't quite be reciprocated. It never is when it comes to "AW" women. Spot on advice , There are two types of Attention Wh0res. The most common (and the most irritating ) is the OVERT type. This is the loud, brassy, showy woman who flirts outrageously.She wears ber cleavage like a fashion accessory. Her need for attention from men extends to teasing all comers. Then there is the COVERT type. THis type presents as demure,very feminine and even a little shy. A girly girl..She uses more girly tactics to draw attention to her. Head tilting , coy looks, eye contact, smiling with a "message" and so on. These women are more patient than the first type and TWICE as destructive, THis is the "butter wouldn't melt in her mouth" type. She is mostly working under the radar and achieves her objective of luring men by playing an ambiguous but deceptive game of attraction. She is just as addicted to male attention as the OVERT type but uses different tactics. Avoid both types BUT especially the Covert type. They have NO respect for other women's relationships OR their own it seems. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MikeCosseva Posted May 31, 2008 Author Share Posted May 31, 2008 LB always has invaluable advice. She is a smart, sophisticated, under the radar, covert type. One day she'll give you that blushing smile with a message, the next day she would obviously ignore you to get you thinking "what the F?" She actually lightened up these last few days and is talking to me and laughing at my jokes. I find her very attractive when she is smiling and I was actually losing my attraction to her when she was ignoring me and playing the quiet, serious role all the time. She has really tone down on the flirtious advances and is chatting with me as a friend now . Yesterday she was staring at me from across the room but is very secretive about doing it now. The other girl I told you about, the OVERT attention whore is acting wild. From blowing on the back of my hair, to simulating grabbing my ass while she thinks I'm not looking, to the whole using her eyes to give me the full body look down, she is really on the prowl. I hear her husband is a lunatic so I am especially staying away from that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MikeCosseva Posted July 27, 2008 Author Share Posted July 27, 2008 HELP. She is flirting with me big time now. Her wedding is in 2 months and the flirting has now become obvious. She is doing most of the flirting when no one is around and is trying to make everyone think I am the advancer when it's really her. The one thing she does in front of everyone is mention how goodlooking I am. But everyone thinks I'm crazy for her and she loves bringing it up when we are in groups. When no one is around she likes to say things to my ear like "we are all alone now , or I'm 5' 9" 130 pounds and i'm waiting for you". I do like them tall and slim. She just loves playing with my head. It is true, I am physically attracted to her and it's getting harder to resist her advances. I just feel like grabbing her and kissing away, just to see if she's all talk. What should I do? Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 HELP. She is flirting with me big time now. Her wedding is in 2 months and the flirting has now become obvious. She is doing most of the flirting when no one is around and is trying to make everyone think I am the advancer when it's really her. The one thing she does in front of everyone is mention how goodlooking I am. But everyone thinks I'm crazy for her and she loves bringing it up when we are in groups. When no one is around she likes to say things to my ear like "we are all alone now , or I'm 5' 9" 130 pounds and i'm waiting for you". I do like them tall and slim. She just loves playing with my head. It is true, I am physically attracted to her and it's getting harder to resist her advances. I just feel like grabbing her and kissing away, just to see if she's all talk. What should I do? I'd ask her, "What's the deal? Aren't you engaged?" Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 Tell her if she keeps acting this way you're gonna tell her fiance. That should shut her up. Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 Tell her if she keeps acting this way you're gonna tell her fiance. That should shut her up. The only way he wants to shut her up is by covering her mouth with his. Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 By the way shes acting while engaged, he might end up contracting a disease from kissing her, who knows how many other guys she is doing this to. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MikeCosseva Posted July 27, 2008 Author Share Posted July 27, 2008 Angel knows me too well. But Spectre that's the thing, she is not that type of girl. She is only like that with me. She did flirt with a 50 year old co-worker just to make me jealous though. I was ignoring her and she felt that the way to get me was to flirt with an older co-worker while I watched. If you guys see her she does not look like the flirticious type. She looks like the suburban all american girl. Which is why people think I'm the flirt. She also tries to look loyal to her fiancee in front of everyone when they bringup the fact that she is soo interested in me. I'm thinking that the next time she whispers something to my ear I'm going to grab and caress her and see how she takes it. If accepts my advances oh boy will there be trouble...but if she refuses then I will put her in her place and end it. How does that sound??? Link to post Share on other sites
O'Malley Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 The only way to one up her is to brush her off totally--make it clear you're bored with her games. Or ask her if she has any hot single friends she could hook you up with. She's a successful attention whore, because she still has you by the cajones. If you're looking for a hookup, look elsewhere. Single or married, she will continue to seek validation from males, whether it's you or some other coworker. Link to post Share on other sites
mental_traveller Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 Looks like this little puppy has his nuts in the palm of her hand. Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 Angel knows me too well. But Spectre that's the thing, she is not that type of girl. She is only like that with me. She did flirt with a 50 year old co-worker just to make me jealous though. I was ignoring her and she felt that the way to get me was to flirt with an older co-worker while I watched. If you guys see her she does not look like the flirticious type. She looks like the suburban all american girl. Which is why people think I'm the flirt. She also tries to look loyal to her fiancee in front of everyone when they bringup the fact that she is soo interested in me. I'm thinking that the next time she whispers something to my ear I'm going to grab and caress her and see how she takes it. If accepts my advances oh boy will there be trouble...but if she refuses then I will put her in her place and end it. How does that sound??? Yeah, I think that would do it. Be prepared for trouble. Link to post Share on other sites
lkjh Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 Angel knows me too well. But Spectre that's the thing, she is not that type of girl. She is only like that with me. She did flirt with a 50 year old co-worker just to make me jealous though. I was ignoring her and she felt that the way to get me was to flirt with an older co-worker while I watched. If you guys see her she does not look like the flirticious type. She looks like the suburban all american girl. Which is why people think I'm the flirt. She also tries to look loyal to her fiancee in front of everyone when they bringup the fact that she is soo interested in me. I'm thinking that the next time she whispers something to my ear I'm going to grab and caress her and see how she takes it. If accepts my advances oh boy will there be trouble...but if she refuses then I will put her in her place and end it. How does that sound??? First off don't grab her because everyone really will think you are the one leading it on. A lot of times the good girl really is a big flirt, thats just how some girls are. Just man up and tell her stop or you will tell her soon to be husband. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MikeCosseva Posted August 13, 2008 Author Share Posted August 13, 2008 Its weird guys. We had a work picnic a few weeks back. She was very aggressive, flirting big time and telling me how good looking I was, out in the open. At this point I don't know if she is F'in with me or she is desperately trying to get laid before she gets married next month. My friend thinks it's number 2. I just didn't like it and kept ignoring her and brushing her off. She was also jealous that I was giving another girl attention while ignoring her obvious advances. At some point in the picnic she was discretly asking me about my sexual life, asking if I got laid on my last vacation and with who. After that day she calmed down. We have been on normal speaking terms for a little bit but for the last few days, for no reason at all she began ignoring me. She would only deal with my co-worker if she needed something from the both of us. Today I found out why. I never returned her wedding invitation. I told her I misplaced it. The truth is I have been pondering to go or not. I said I will but I can always have an "emergency" that day. What do you guys think? and whats a good "emergency" ? Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted August 13, 2008 Share Posted August 13, 2008 I don't understand why you're not more direct with her. Why play these games instead of just asking her what the deal is? You're obviously attracted to her, otherwise these 'ignore' games she plays with you wouldn't have any effect. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MikeCosseva Posted August 13, 2008 Author Share Posted August 13, 2008 I have and she denied it and said I'm flirting with her. You're right though I have to be more stern with her. I have to end this if she's playing with me. I'm just use to girls flirting my way at work but this one I like. Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted August 13, 2008 Share Posted August 13, 2008 As far as the wedding is concerned, it's hard for me to answer about an excuse because I don't know why you don't want to go in the first place. Is it because it will bug you to see her get married? If so, just tell her you won't be able to make it. You're not obligated to give her the exact reason. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted August 13, 2008 Share Posted August 13, 2008 She was also jealous that I was giving another girl attention while ignoring her obvious advances. At Yeah you should have told her straight up - "I don't flirt and come onto engaged women!" Then you start ignoring her. She is NOT a friend, let alone someone you want to know. Imagine if that was YOUR fiance?? Bet you wouldn't like that display of behaviour. Either way, she sounds insecure and needs attention. Link to post Share on other sites
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