For those of you who have to fly to see your SO

[Maggs]

Obviously it's pretty tricky sometimes going in and out of another country so frequently. How often are you or your SO going through customs? And how do you generally explain yourself? I don't know if some countries frown on you saying you're there to visit a boyfriend or a girlfriend or if you just tell them you're there to travel, holiday, visit friends, etc.

 

I only ask because I'll be going in 3 1/2 weeks to see my BF and it'll be the first time I enter the country again since my previous visa expired. (I had a working holidaymaker visa issued from Canada for the UK).

 

Thanks!

[TMichaels]

Obviously it's pretty tricky sometimes going in and out of another country so frequently. How often are you or your SO going through customs? And how do you generally explain yourself? I don't know if some countries frown on you saying you're there to visit a boyfriend or a girlfriend or if you just tell them you're there to travel, holiday, visit friends, etc.

 

I only ask because I'll be going in 3 1/2 weeks to see my BF and it'll be the first time I enter the country again since my previous visa expired. (I had a working holidaymaker visa issued from Canada for the UK).Thanks!

 

Maggs,

 

I don't know how often you're planning on making trips to see your b/f, but unless it's every few weeks, I wouldn't worry about setting off any alarm bells.

 

Whenever I'm asked by immigration the purpose of my trip, I always say "holiday." Usually that's sufficient, especially if you smile and say something like "lots of shopping and sightseeing, I hope!"

 

Sometimes I've had them ask for how long and/or ask to see my return ticket to see if indeed what I said was true, but most of the time I got the impression that inquiry was more to break the boredom of their day, than trying to catch me in a lie.

 

Once in a great while I've been asked where I plan to visit (as in cities/locations). Not hard to rattle that off -- you'll be going/staying somewhere, so just tell the truth.

 

A time or two I've been asked where I plan to stay (in a hotel, with friends, etc.) I never say I am there to visit my boyfriend, as conceivably that could raise suspicion that what I'm really doing is coming over to get married and/or plan to overstay my visa.

 

Though things have gotten tighter post-9/11, you should be just fine. Best rule of thumb is not get all up tight about it. Acting nervous or peculiar will raise more red flags than making a return trip to somewhere you've visited before.

 

HTH,

TMichaels

[Eilonwy]

I don't know if some countries frown on you saying you're there to visit a boyfriend or a girlfriend or if you just tell them you're there to travel, holiday, visit friends, etc.

 

I've only visited my SO twice so far (thrid time is in a few days ), but when asked for the reason of my visist I said "visiting my boyfriend" both times. However, they gave me strange looks and asked how we met. I was then worried to say the truth, because we met online. I was afraid they might not just let me through if I said that, so I said we met on a vacation.

 

Already wondering what to say next time... after all, we spent nearly 6 months "real time" together in one place, so it shouldn't matter how we met. And maybe I was just paranoid...

[Maggs]

Maggs,

 

I don't know how often you're planning on making trips to see your b/f, but unless it's every few weeks, I wouldn't worry about setting off any alarm bells.

 

Whenever I'm asked by immigration the purpose of my trip, I always say "holiday." Usually that's sufficient, especially if you smile and say something like "lots of shopping and sightseeing, I hope!"

 

Sometimes I've had them ask for how long and/or ask to see my return ticket to see if indeed what I said was true, but most of the time I got the impression that inquiry was more to break the boredom of their day, than trying to catch me in a lie.

 

Once in a great while I've been asked where I plan to visit (as in cities/locations). Not hard to rattle that off -- you'll be going/staying somewhere, so just tell the truth.

 

A time or two I've been asked where I plan to stay (in a hotel, with friends, etc.) I never say I am there to visit my boyfriend, as conceivably that could raise suspicion that what I'm really doing is coming over to get married and/or plan to overstay my visa.

 

Though things have gotten tighter post-9/11, you should be just fine. Best rule of thumb is not get all up tight about it. Acting nervous or peculiar will raise more red flags than making a return trip to somewhere you've visited before.

 

HTH,

TMichaels

 

I'll probably be going there approximately every 3-4 months. This will be the first visit and it's been 4 months since I left there. I do have friends there anyway that I'll mention visiting as well. But I do agree--I think if I mention a BF, they'd start to raise their eyebrows. Even though I did live there on a visa and met him that way, I still don't want to be 'red-flagged'. Especially if down the line, that's where we'll be living together.

[carhill]

Interestingly, I've found Australia and New Zealand to ask the most questions and require the most documentation (like onward itineraries and lodging information). I was there 4 times last year, sometimes for only a day, on a multi-entry ETA (for Oz). By contrast, the UK is relatively benign, at least at immigration. I've done a few mileage runs there, some with a same day turnaround, and have yet to have any issues. Most significant inquiries have been in the FSU, but that was pre-911 and not too many years post-communism. The OP's home country has been quite friendly, at least in Toronto, Ottawa and Vancouver, the three ports of entry I've used.

 

My most common answers to immigration questions have been "visit friends", "shopping" and "tourism", all of which are true. I once flew to England to take a cheap transat cruise back (to NYC) and told immigration exactly that. Answer: "Next time, come back and stay awhile"

 

No worries, OP; go have fun with your BF. Travel is easy.

[TMichaels]

I've only visited my SO twice so far (thrid time is in a few days ), but when asked for the reason of my visist I said "visiting my boyfriend" both times. However, they gave me strange looks and asked how we met. I was then worried to say the truth, because we met online. I was afraid they might not just let me through if I said that, so I said we met on a vacation.

 

Already wondering what to say next time... after all, we spent nearly 6 months "real time" together in one place, so it shouldn't matter how we met. And maybe I was just paranoid...

 

Eilonwy,

 

No, you weren't paranoid -- they probably did look at you funny.

 

What I've been told is that single women travelers, especially those who are going back and forth to visit a "boyfriend" do fit a "profile." Apparently, there have been instances where women have been used as "mules" (used to transport contraband or worse) by so-called boyfriends. The women may be totally unsuspecting or so in love with the person they don't ask questions and are happy to "bring something back" for their sweetheart. Sometimes (unbeknowst to the woman) she has been specifically wooed and groomed by a guy to be his "mule."

 

I used to do a fair amount of international travel -- all for personal growth and enrichment -- nothing to do with a boyfriend or business at all. I'm not going to bore you with all the sordid details, but there was one time during the first Gulf war (PRE 9/11) that I spent nearly two hours being interrogated by security officials before check-in for my return flight to the U.S. including having to prove who paid for my ticket and my hotel while traveling. Once "released" and inside the departure hall I was then "tailed" by a less than obvious security hack until my flight was called.

 

All of this evidently prompted by the fact that I was a single woman, travelling alone, in the middle of winter, in a Nordic country I had visited before, where I had no friends, family, work-related meetings, etc., etc., etc. IOW, what could I possibly be up to, but no good? Poor little delicate flowers that we are... Traveling alone in order to see the world... How dare we be so bold!

 

The worst thing you can do, however, is to give Customs/Immigration "attitude" about it -- no matter how irritated you are. After another particularly long and tiring return flight from abroad, the last thing I was in the mood for was "the lone female inquisition routine" from security -- so I let the woman security officer have it, telling her how insulting it was to be singled out for scrutiny when their were dozens of single men travelers on the same flight that were waved on without a care. Of all people (since she was a woman in what is still a mostly male-dominated field), she should understand that women are perfectly capable to travel, experience and savor the joys of new people, places and things all by their lonesome, if they so choose.

 

Needless to say, she was not impressed or empathetic to my suggestion of "sisterhood!"

 

For the first time in dozens of trips, even though my Customs declaration was below the limit, I was marched over to the Customs window, and after some whispered consultation with the agent and a thorough review of my Customs Declaration AND my bags, I was finally let go.

 

Things have gotten even "weirder" since 9/11. However, don't fret. Simply don't mention you're traveling to visit a boyfriend. If they ask why you're returning to the country you visited/stayed in before, tell them that you love XXXX and are can't think of a better place to spend your holiday -- as there's so much to see and do.

 

As I said earlier -- don't act weird or paranoid -- and no matter how much you'd like to tell the Customs/Immigration/Security people to "stuff it," keep your cool and you'll do just fine.

 

Best,

TMichaels

[Eilonwy]

TMichaels - Thanks for sharing your experiences and the advice!

 

Ach, I'm such a fool! I was always so happy when finally arriving in his country that I happily told them I was visiting my boyfriend. While I knew they might be suspicious because they could think I just wanted to get married, I thought it wouldn't be a problem once they saw my passport, since Swiss people don't usually try to marry into other countries. The "mule" idea never even occured to me! This makes sense, and I've actually seen reports on TV about it... but somehow I just forgot about it completely. I think I'm lucky they never did more than question me more seriously.

 

This time I'll definitely do what you suggested and just claim to be on vacation. It is partly true, too.

[Lyssa]

We try to visit each other every 4 or 6 months. Every time I travel to his country, I tell them I'm there for holiday. Out of 4 or 5 times I've been there, I met the same custom officer 3 times and the last time I met him, I told him I met someone special there hence my return trip!

 

Travel smart, Maggs. Avoid telling too much especially strangers. You just never know what they are up to.

 

Enjoy your holiday!