Do you hate everything about your life ?

[Karyyk]

On a side note: There is a reason all secretaries are female and its is because guys like me love bossing around women. Why servers, cashiers... retails, are all female and it is because men like me enjoy being jerks to women.

 

I want for selfish reasons but so many people have many things I can only dream of right now. What is wrong with a little guy like me with relatively not much, getting a little bit angry and admitting yeah, my life does suck.

 

I think it has more to do with certain types of men wanting to push women around because they perceive them as weaker. It's predatory behavior.

 

It's also because they themselves feel weak and don't have the power to push anyone around. They see women as easier prey. They don't even think about pushing around other men. You enjoy being a jerk to women because you think you can. If you were a jerk to another man, well, you think he'd be more apt to put you in your place. I'm sure you won't admit that though.

 

I'm not particularly important, my career isn't necessarily rewarding, and yeah, life more or less sucks in some ways, but making myself feel better by pushing people around doesn't appeal to me. The only people I've ever enjoyed pushing around were bullies.

[MaxManwell]

This isn't a moral question I need advice. There are a lot of people that have hurt me and have done things that have caused me pain. I want to cause those people pain in return. I wouldn't ever do anything to anyone who didn't have it coming in the first place.

 

At the moment I am a powerless little dweeb and I am not getting much more powerful as the years go by. I need a way to change drastically and am hoping to hear some experiences so I know that it might be possible for me.

[Crestfallen_KH]

Change your mindset - the others are right that it's about attitude.

 

As long as you continue to see yourself as a victim who goes through life where things "just happen" to him, you'll never take charge of your own life and destiny. Stop being a victim and make things happen.

 

LB had a good post. Reread it for a good start.

[BiAxident]

I want for selfish reasons but so many people have many things I can only dream of right now. What is wrong with a little guy like me with relatively not much, getting a little bit angry and admitting yeah, my life does suck.

 

First off, saying that you "can only dream of something" is a great way of never getting that thing. Secondly, as I've already pointed to you, when compared to most of the world you are wealthy, and (I assume), healthy. Relatively speaking, there is always going to be someone with more than you. How much is enough? Finally, saying that you "hate everything about your life" becaue you can't boss around women in spite of the fact you have testicles, makes you sound exceedingly pathetic.

 

It you have the motivation to seek out attention on this site, perhaps you also have the motivation to take the actions necessary to change your life? Or at least investigate what it would take to motivate you, or what actions you should take? There are lots of self-help books/cd's and therapists out there that could help you.

[Geishawhelk]

This isn't a moral question I need advice. There are a lot of people that have hurt me and have done things that have caused me pain. I want to cause those people pain in return. I wouldn't ever do anything to anyone who didn't have it coming in the first place.

 

At the moment I am a powerless little dweeb and I am not getting much more powerful as the years go by. I need a way to change drastically and am hoping to hear some experiences so I know that it might be possible for me.

Regarding the first comment (in bold), read my first signature.

Regarding the second comment (in bold), read my second signature.

 

I didn't make them up.

They come from some of the Oldest teachings in the world.

They're tried, tested and they happen to be absolutely true.

I haven't found anything, or anyone who has managed to contradict them yet....

 

If you hold frustration, resentment, anger and animosity in your heart, it will just make you more frustrated, resentful, angry and hostile. And these are not motivating emotions. They won't propel you forward, they will hold you back.

By all means, have something to motivate you - but don't make it Revenge.

It gets you nowhere but down.

 

And carry on thinking you're a 'powerless little dweeb' and - guess what - ? that's how you'll stay.

 

So, back to my questions (remember?):

 

Where are we wrong?

 

How is "No-one will hand you anything" a 'staple tool of oppression'...?

Where is the error in the statement?

 

What do you intend to do about it?

[MaxManwell]

Because it makes people accept the status quo. Instead of saying 'My company is screwing me we need to do something about it' they just accept it because you're brainwashed into thinking it is your own fault, or that it is a tempory situation. By making that vague statement you hope to lul me into accepting complancency and mediocracy.

 

It stops us from finding a better career; or using your intelligence to the best of your ability, in other words we stop competing. You just want me to settle for a lesser position and be happy because other wise it wil intrude on your perfect little vision of the world.

[MaxManwell]

First off, saying that you "can only dream of something" is a great way of never getting that thing. Secondly, as I've already pointed to you, when compared to most of the world you are wealthy, and (I assume), healthy. Relatively speaking, there is always going to be someone with more than you. How much is enough? Finally, saying that you "hate everything about your life" becaue you can't boss around women in spite of the fact you have testicles, makes you sound exceedingly pathetic.

 

It you have the motivation to seek out attention on this site, perhaps you also have the motivation to take the actions necessary to change your life? Or at least investigate what it would take to motivate you, or what actions you should take? There are lots of self-help books/cd's and therapists out there that could help you.

 

All of that is designed to get me to conform to something I really don't want to. I want to be better than I am now in absolute terms. Not some pointless measure of personal achievment but I want to be much higher up in society.

 

People provide vague ideas about how to get there which only serve as I said earlier to lul me into complacency.

[Geishawhelk]

OK then...

let me ask you this...

Where, and how far has thinking this way, gotten you?

 

Why do you perceive it's something everyone else should be doing for you?

What makes you think you deserve things handed to you on a platter?

Do you really think everyone who has achieved success, did it through sitting back and waiting for things to fall into their lap?

 

If you alway do what you've always done, then you'll always get what you've always gotten.

 

One thing I'd advise you to do, is to watch "The pursuit of Happyness".

If you really want to know how to get things done, the guy in that movie is a good example.

It's a true story.

 

Oh by the way...

Take that enormous, gargantuan sequoia-sized chip off your shoulder.

The only thing it's doing is weighing you down and making you more little.

[MaxManwell]

I believe for a large portion of people they went to college young, picked the right major, and happened to fit into a particular culture.

 

Right place, right time most of them never find out what hard work is but seem to talk about it a lot.

[Geishawhelk]

like you, you mean.

 

It's patently obvious that you would rather sit back and be spoonfed that get off your office chair and generate something for yourself.

You keep avoiding the questions and challenges.

You haven't risen up and asked anyone about how you go about creating these opportunities for yourself, what you should do to move forward.

 

No matter what we suggest, you have to understand that it will all be UP TO YOU.....

But you don't want that.

You don't want to have to work that hard, do you?

 

So, just keep doing what you're doing.

And in 20 years time - you'll still be a 'Mr Nowhere' man.

But with more bitterness and regrets, more resentment and anger.

 

And ir will all be completely self-generated.

 

Good luck buddy.

You need it in spades....

[american-woman]

This isn't a moral question I need advice. There are a lot of people that have hurt me and have done things that have caused me pain. I want to cause those people pain in return. I wouldn't ever do anything to anyone who didn't have it coming in the first place.

 

At the moment I am a powerless little dweeb and I am not getting much more powerful as the years go by. I need a way to change drastically and am hoping to hear some experiences so I know that it might be possible for me.

 

 

 

BITTER PEOPLE CANNOT GO FORWARD.CHANGE THINGS YOU DONT LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF

[MaxManwell]

I don't think you people fully understand the difference between feeling better about yourself and bettering yourself.

 

I am not interested in just feeling better I want to be better.

[american-woman]

I don't think you people fully understand the difference between feeling better about yourself and bettering yourself.

 

I am not interested in just feeling better I want to be better.

 

 

 

 

When you better yourself you feel better. And only you can do that!!!!! So stop whining and get on with it!!!!!!!!!

[PandorasBox]

"I need advice."

 

People have given you advice. But yet you seem to shoot down alot of what people have said. Some people "hate" everything, because they choose to. They talk about how they hate this and that and how miserable they are, BUT I have to wonder if they really don't hate it but enjoy it. They get something out of being miserable or they would change their thinking on things.

[confused2007]

I believe for a large portion of people they went to college young, picked the right major, and happened to fit into a particular culture.

 

Right place, right time most of them never find out what hard work is but seem to talk about it a lot.

 

Luck = opportunity + preparation

[Geishawhelk]

I don't think you people fully understand the difference between feeling better about yourself and bettering yourself.

 

I am not interested in just feeling better I want to be better.

 

So come on then, Max, if you don't take to heart all the advice (asked for) that we have put forward - and I think you could say we have all been pretty consistent in our advice to you; we've all basically offered you the same thing - how else do you propose to find a way of making you be better?

What would you like to see happening, and how could you engineer that?

 

Remember the advice - Nobody else can do anything for you. You have to be in control of your future, your destiny, your actions.

 

So, taking that as a given - what do you propose to do now?

[josie54]

I don't think you people fully understand the difference between feeling better about yourself and bettering yourself.

 

I am not interested in just feeling better I want to be better.

 

Try this: Have a close friend be diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer (or prostate cancer or any kind of cancer) at 29 years old. Watch her (or him) suffer for five long years through drug treatments and finally chemotherapy. Watch chemotherapy take everything she had or was one thing at a time--her ability to hold a glass because of nerve damage in her hands, her ability to walk because the chemo weakened her bones and caused her to break her ankle, her ability to see clearly because the chemo dried out her eyes so much that she scratched her corneas--her ability to eat, drink, sleep, and finally breathe.

 

Go to see her in the hospital, unconscious and on a ventilator, for the last time. Try to comfort her husband who has to take her off the ventilator. Deal with her death at age 35 just last month. Attend her funeral. Watch her family suffer. Suffer yourself because of the loss.

 

Then, every time you feel like being an a$$, think of your friend and what kind of legacy you leave for her (or him). Think about the fact that she'll never get to be with her husband, or be with friends, or grow old. Think of how you can honor your friend in ways big and small.

 

Think about the fact that you're still alive and she's not. Then, act like you deserve it.

 

That's a very effective way to "be better." Although I don't highly recommend it.

 

Josie.

[Geishawhelk]

I on the contrary, do. Highly.

If we were all as acutely aware of our own fragile existence, we'd be a lot more mindful and conscientious about how we go about our days.

[Suiyobi]

I hate everything about my life and it makes me want to hurt people.

 

Have you, or do you hate everything about your life and how did you improve ? are you still after many years still hating everything ?

 

Or did you get used to it and trick yourself into believing that you are happy ?

 

I'm pretty content with life. Got a job, almost graduating from the university, have a home to live in, and good friends and family members to be with. Developing intimate relationships with girls is my only issue right now but I'm looking at it positively as a learning process, so it's not too bad.

 

If you hate everything in life, maybe you should look into a different hobby, preferably something that is unique. Get your mind out of the depressing realities of life for a bit.

[Cherry Blossom 35]

Complaining is his hobby. Being miserable is his hobby. He has stated outright he wants to be "better" than other people and he wants to "boss women around the office" which basically sounds like a 3rd grader boy's approach to life.

[MaxManwell]

Complaining is his hobby. Being miserable is his hobby. He has stated outright he wants to be "better" than other people and he wants to "boss women around the office" which basically sounds like a 3rd grader boy's approach to life.

 

You know what I honestly think sometimes.

 

That most women are too stupid to understand decency and therefore should be mistreated and bossed around by a person like me.

 

You know why ? because change the situation and reverse the power role and you will see some horrible, nasty and draconian little harpies that are not intelligent enough to understand kindness or look past a situation that benefits them for the sake of another person.

 

Then I calm myself down and try to think of the truly selfless things women have done and I come up rather short but there are some truly decent and humble women out there. Intelligence also comes in many forms and I am reminded that I am not always the logical creature I try as shown by my initial state of anger.

[Cherry Blossom 35]

I think you need to get to know women as human beings, not caricatures and stereotypes.

 

How can you do that?

 

Do you think you would be happier if you had more charitable feelings towards women, or does it make you happier to be in control and dominating towards them?

 

I think you like controlling and dominating. I hope, however, that perhaps in the future you will change your attitude. You said you hate your life. Do you not think that having so many hateful thoughts in your head contributes to that?

[kellyautier]

When I feel crappy I think of people who truly have reasons to be unhappy (there's enough hunger out there to go around) or i think of the medieval times when women did not have any rights. Like Eleanor of Aquitaine (Katherine Hepburn), a prisoner by her own husband - She has many jewels but is in fact very poor in the Lion in Winter. Here's a picture of her wearing her ginormous ring

[MaxManwell]

 

Do you think you would be happier if you had more charitable feelings towards women, or does it make you happier to be in control and dominating towards them?

 

 

They're mine I own them.

[american-woman]

They're mine I own them.

 

 

Sweety YOU own NO ONE..................human beings are no ones property.as I said before a counsler will do you wonders. I wonder what you think of your mother