Bar chicks worth banging, not worth dating

[luvmy2ns]

It's getting on a tangent but I was just saying that luvmy2ns was giving Stockalone flak for saying that he only sleeps with women he's committed to. A woman wouldn't be given a hard time for saying the same thing.

 

I did NOT give him flak for that. I gave him flak for cutting out any woman who WOULD sleep with him without a commitment, and only in the sense that he may be cutting his own throat.

[luvmy2ns]

I'm not going to sleep with someone I would not consider dating!

 

However, I note that you claim to have had a couple ONS... why did you not date those men?

 

Who said I didn't? What may have started as a ONS sometimes becomes something more, if you're not closed minded. One was a 5+ year relationship.

[luvmy2ns]

I understand what you mean. But if I would believe that, then I would give up and remain single.

 

However, I am not yet willing to do that. But I have been thinking long and and hard for the last two years now about what I can expect in the future.

 

Changing my requirements is not an option. Decisions have consequences, and maybe a life of solitude from here on out is what my decisions will lead to. I had to make decisions in the past that had more dire consequences.

 

I will just have to wait and see what the future holds. Prepare for the worst, and hope for the best.

 

Good luck then. And I mean that with all sincerity.

[Tomcat33]

since when does not worth dating = no respect ??

 

 

since you had sex the person you don't find worth dating, that's when!

It is a complete contradiction of actions and it says you ultimately don't respect yourself.

and the best part is a lot of the times these same men don't EVEN find the women physically attractive they will sleep with anything that has a pulse just to say that they got a woman to "cave"

Seriously, how low can you go?

[tanbark813]

I did NOT give him flak for that. I gave him flak for cutting out any woman who WOULD sleep with him without a commitment, and only in the sense that he may be cutting his own throat.

 

Ahh, okay.

 

And I agree with you actually. To each his own though.

[luvmy2ns]

Ahh, okay.

 

And I agree with you actually. To each his own though.

 

Exactly. And he's not like the guys who were the subject of this thread. He actually adheres to his own expectations himself. For that, I have the utmost respect for him.

[lino]

why are you insulting me, because I struck a nerve? SO WHAT if I suggested jerk off, JERK OFF if you really "need" to get laid, what is so ridiculous about what I said. Give me one good reason why you MUST fck and chck a woman instead of jerking off?

 

One good reason why one must? No one must do anything. One good reason why one can? OK..simply because one can if he/she chooses to. Is that hard to understand? It's not illegal to f*ck & chuck and both men and women CAN and DO it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Clearly you haven't a clue about women

 

Well this I can totally agree with!

 

and all the women can attest to this here women CAN form a relationship from a one night stand NO PROBLEM. We don't put down men who sleep with us on a first date and would NOT write him off for that unless of course he was hung like a hamster and he was horrible in bed then of course that would change eveything why would you want a lifetime of that?

 

Men are capable of this too. You aren't even remotely close to proving anything with this ridiculous statement.

 

 

 

 

 

You are COMPLETELY mixing apples and oranges you are saying that a woman wanting equal rights in terms of getting proper payment for her profession, or for being able to walk the streets and do something a man can do is akin to using a woman who gives up sex for a first date.

One if fighting for equality of human rights the other is asking to accept the exploitation and abuse of human rights, HOW IS THAT EVEN REMOTELY CLOSE?

 

I guess whe know who the chavenists are here...GEES!

 

The one mixing things is your eyes, read! I never said anything about proper payment in a profession. I said I agree that what you're talking about is a double standard. So is women wanting things paid for them sinply because they are women yet they want everything else equal too. If one double standard is to be accepted then so should be the other. I accept both of them happily because that's simply how the real world is, not the fantasy you want it to be.

 

 

 

 

My opinion is BOTH educated, and based on facts unlike what a chauvenist pig does when he resorts to quickly writing off a woman because she was sexually open with him on a first date or what have you....

 

you wish. What facts have you mentioned? Only your deluded view of reality.

Again, buy some new running shoes!

[Untouchable_Fire]

Who said I didn't? What may have started as a ONS sometimes becomes something more, if you're not closed minded. One was a 5+ year relationship.

 

5+ years? That hardly qualifies as a ONS. That's like a 2,000NS.

 

Exactly. And he's not like the guys who were the subject of this thread. He actually adheres to his own expectations himself. For that, I have the utmost respect for him.

 

I have two friends who are exact perfect examples of the point on this thread.

 

"Jake" just got out of a 3 year relationship. "Bob" advises him to hit the bar scene and find some really easy women to "knock the dust off". Telling him that it's Ok to lower your standards for a while just to get back in the game.

 

Now, I understand the basic idea is that he needs to rebuild his confidence. Confidence is insanely important to women. However, I think he should rebuild his social circle instead of chasing after booty calls.

[luvmy2ns]

5+ years? That hardly qualifies as a ONS. That's like a 2,000NS.

 

I said it started as one. Did you even read the whole post?

[Untouchable_Fire]

I said it started as one. Did you even read the whole post?

 

They all start as one. Unless you date guys and only do it once!

 

 

To the original topic. I think Stockalone and TBF, have the best answers. That is to hold yourself to a high standard, and don't accept less from others.

 

As to why the double standard exists... it's a natural byproduct of the biological and social differences between the sexes. Women want men who have had other partners, men want women who have not.

[luvmy2ns]

They all start as one. Unless you date guys and only do it once!

 

This IS part of the original topic, BTW. And a ONS doesn't begin as a date. It's when you're out, haven't had any in awhile, and you notice a guy who is already out himself. You like the way he looks and carries himself. You decide to go home together to share a little mutual enjoyment. You connect in enough other ways that you choose to explore an actual relationship. THAT is the difference between writing a person off JUST because they had sex with you as a ONS and actually opening your mind to discovering who that person is beyond great sex, providing you hit it off vertically as WELL as horizontally.

[MaxManwell]

Why can't women just accept that men view them as objects ? But at the same time we accept they are also people. Just go with it its not meant to make sense.

[norajane]

Well, this came up once in a discussion I had. One of the guys said that if a woman is willing to f*** a complete stranger, how on earth is he going to trust her to make good choices while raising their children. Never mind that he was the stranger in that equation.

 

While I understand that this is insane and the one has nothing to do with the other, I can't help but agree with it. Aside from the moral objections I have, I am also worried that the bad decision making (like sleeping with strangers) will translate to other parts of her life.

To point out the obvious, if HE is the stranger she is f*cking, then HE is also f*cking a stranger. Does he also question HIMSELF as to whether he would make good choices while raising their children? Why not, since he is doing exactly the same thing as she is? Is he worried that his bad decision making will translate into other parts of his life? Or is sleeping with strangers not a bad decision when he does it, although it is for her to do it?

[MaxManwell]

A better question to ask and one that might explain it to you ladies a little bit clearer.

 

Why don't we see many male strip clubs ?

Why is there hooters but no male equivalent ?

Why are there a many businesses that use cute females to attract business, but few male ones ?

Why do men objectify women but not the other way around ?

 

You are not looking at the bigger picture only the part that affects you that you can benefit from.

[MaxManwell]

Here it is : Women are sex

Men have sex

[Stockalone]

To point out the obvious, if HE is the stranger she is f*cking, then HE is also f*cking a stranger. Does he also question HIMSELF as to whether he would make good choices while raising their children? Why not, since he is doing exactly the same thing as she is? Is he worried that his bad decision making will translate into other parts of his life? Or is sleeping with strangers not a bad decision when he does it, although it is for her to do it?

 

You don't need to point that out to me. As I said in an earlier reply to sally4sara:

 

I know men that have that double standards, but it isn't my problem and it isn't my job to correct that behaviour. Besides, they would never listen to the crazy guy who doesn't bang the bar chicks.

 

I think it is the women's responsibility to punish the men that have that double standard by not dating them. However, I see lots of women who aren't concerned about that double standard when it comes to the guy they are dating.

[luvmy2ns]

A better question to ask and one that might explain it to you ladies a little bit clearer.

 

Why don't we see many male strip clubs ?

Why is there hooters but no male equivalent ?

Why are there a many businesses that use cute females to attract business, but few male ones ?

Why do men objectify women but not the other way around ?

 

You are not looking at the bigger picture only the part that affects you that you can benefit from.

 

Um, because most men are pigs?

[MaxManwell]

Um, because most men are pigs?

 

Or are women just ungrateful ? We 'pigs' give you girls jobs.

 

You still have not answered my question.

[tanbark813]

Um, because most men are pigs?

 

You can't blame it solely on men. If there were no women making themselves hot, there would be no hot women to ogle.

[J2FT1]

A better question to ask and one that might explain it to you ladies a little bit clearer.

 

Why don't we see many male strip clubs ?

Why is there hooters but no male equivalent ?

Why are there a many businesses that use cute females to attract business, but few male ones ?

Why do men objectify women but not the other way around ?

 

You are not looking at the bigger picture only the part that affects you that you can benefit from.

 

Here it is : Women are sex

Men have sex

 

Haha, both very valid points.

[twice_shy]

Ok so I seem to see this type of advice from men, to other men looking to settle down but who seem to get a lot of easy lays instead, that goes a little something like this:

 

"Don't settle for the easy lays you can get from a bar, steer clear from forming a long term relationship with these types of women BUT until you do meet the right girl, keep banging them anyway"

 

WTF?!?!?

 

 

I am extremely curious to see what the rationale is behind this way of thinking. I seem to see this kind of double standard a LOT and for once I would like to hear a good argument that makes sense in terms of how this type of advice even makes sense.

 

When you as a guy tell another guy to sleep with chicks that he can bang easily at bars until he can get a "good" woman worth keeping but to not plan a long term relationship with "those" types of women, then what exactly is your message here? and What makes men think that a guy that bangs a lot of chicks at bars is what a good woman wants?

 

Exactly. Men that don't want a bar s!ut to wed, but will bang them, are nothing but bar s!uts themselves and why would a good woman want that?

 

I don't want a woman that frequents bars or nightclubs myself, therefore you won't catch me in a bar, at least not to look for women. I'll go there to have a beer with friends on a Friday after work, but not to look for women.

[J2FT1]

Women encourage ojectification by posing nude, wearing skanky outfits, etc... Notice how men only have the "suit" while women find new ways to dress half-nakid to a cocktail party (no pun intended). Many women use looks to further their careers, which is sad.

[luvmy2ns]

Or are women just ungrateful ? We 'pigs' give you girls jobs.

 

You still have not answered my question.

 

Sorry to disappoint, but I would NEVER have looked for a job like that. I actually have a brain, and I prefer to use it.

 

BTW, I HAVE seen men strip down to absolutely NOTHING (yes, I said nothing) in a few strip clubs myself. It certainly didn't make me think less of them.

 

So guys, next time you're at a strip club ogling the neked women, think of who is really using who in the equation. The gal showing her bare tits, or the dumbass spending his hard earned money to see 'em?

[luvmy2ns]

Exactly. Men that don't want a bar s!ut to wed, but will bang them, are nothing but bar s!uts themselves and why would a good woman want that?

 

I don't want a woman that frequents bars or nightclubs myself, therefore you won't catch me in a bar, at least not to look for women. I'll go there to have a beer with friends on a Friday after work, but not to look for women.

 

And herein lies a double standard. You go to bars. Do you think you're not suitable as a mate because of that?

[norajane]

You don't need to point that out to me. As I said in an earlier reply to sally4sara:

I know men that have that double standards, but it isn't my problem and it isn't my job to correct that behaviour. Besides, they would never listen to the crazy guy who doesn't bang the bar chicks.

 

I think it is the women's responsibility to punish the men that have that double standard by not dating them. However, I see lots of women who aren't concerned about that double standard when it comes to the guy they are dating.

 

Women must punish men? Why? Don't men have brains capable of logical and reasonable thought? Is it too much to ask that those men who hold the double standard question themselves and their beliefs, and perhaps form a more enlightened view?