Bar chicks worth banging, not worth dating

[MaxManwell]

That's a very primitive viewpoint.

 

its a primitive thing

 

primal women are sexy

[SugarKiss]

its a primitive thing

 

primal women are sexy

 

 

yuck Neanderthals are so not in

 

and I think Tanbark meant that your way if thinking is primal not women

[sally4sara]

what are you (men) a machine operated toys? puppets? stuffed animals? a cartoon character? why in the world can't the man the one that has the sexual control?

 

just because it's up to the woman to let the man "in" it doesn't mean he has no responsibility in the matter, and just because everyone lets him in it doesn't mean he has to go in. that is what differentiates a slutty man from a man that uses his reason to be sexual and that is where the double standard lies.

 

strip joints are all over the place and any man can go into them as long as he is of age, and yet some men will go others wouldn't be caught dead in one and find them downright depressing and pointless. so don't tell me men have no control over their sexuality because women are open to it.

 

there are men that will funk anything, and then there are guys who are selective. don't tell me the men that funk anything have the easy women to blame because unless he is a machine operated dildo, he has every right and every sense to be selective to say no.

 

that is the most disgusting and chauvenistic double standard I have ever read. then again you are the same person that compared women to a rump roast or a slab of cow meat. exactly where were you brought up in a forest by wild animals?

 

Well if I hadn't already put him on the my ignore list, this would've had me clicking it now! Disgusting! Of course, when everyone ends up quoting what they want to argue, I have to read it anyway making it almost pointless; I'd blissfully missed the rump roast and cow meat comment till now.

 

I agree with you SugarKiss, the whole idea that men have no self control has become a tired and over used excuse to try to get out of accountability. I've found it sadly ironic that some guys complain about women never being held accountable because of their gender, but the same men will look to these worn out excuses for why they are not responsible for their own actions. And WE are suppose to be the illogical ones! HA!

They don't understand that if women really bought into this line of thought, they'd be leaving the house with GPS locked to their ankle and have to account for every minute alone. Not an ideal way to live in my book. I often wonder how many sane men feel truly insulted when they hear another guy paint the entire gender like they are one step away from humping the nearest leg?

[luvmy2ns]

yuck Neanderthals are so not in

 

and I think Tanbark meant that your way if thinking is primal not women

 

I think his medulla oblongota is having a meltdown.

[SugarKiss]

Well if I hadn't already put him on the my ignore list, this would've had me clicking it now! Disgusting! Of course, when everyone ends up quoting what they want to argue, I have to read it anyway making it almost pointless; I'd blissfully missed the rump roast and cow meat comment till now.

 

I agree with you SugarKiss, the whole idea that men have no self control has become a tired and over used excuse to try to get out of accountability. I've found it sadly ironic that some guys complain about women never being held accountable because of their gender, but the same men will look to these worn out excuses for why they are not responsible for their own actions. And WE are suppose to be the illogical ones! HA!

They don't understand that if women really bought into this line of thought, they'd be leaving the house with GPS locked to their ankle and have to account for every minute alone. Not an ideal way to live in my book. I often wonder how many sane men feel truly insulted when they hear another guy paint the entire gender like they are one step away from humping the nearest leg?

 

 

sorry I ruined the ignore function for you.

 

I am still in shock after reading that. he had put down that a woman is like a good slab of meat you will want to keep in your feezer and dress all up and take it out on the town and eat it and really enjoy it...and I don't know what other nonsense he was saying about how a good woman is like good cut of meat but that at the end of the day women are just slabs of meat. it was the most disgusting thing I have ever read.

 

 

then again this comes from a guy who's only experience with women comes from paying prostitutes to submit to him. I mean how could you not view women as chunks of meat when that is what you order every time you have a need for intimacy?

 

boy this guy is in for a real treat when he opens his eyes out to how the real world works, to how real people relate and to how in the real world of healthy and mature human beings people respect one another enough not to want to have to make another human being "submit" to them in order to show them respect of love (unless of course it comes naturally to someone) it is called compromise and it is called mutual agreement through respect and admiration. That is what love is founded on. When you have never experienced love and you have never had a another human being, in this case a woman, show you resepect and admiration, you won't have any semblance of having a healthy grasp of what a human interconnection is all about.

 

a lot of men that "use" women to sleep with and disrespect them by waiting around for a Ms right to come along while they put down those that they willingly "use" to fill the void are very much like l MaxManwell they may not be sleeping with prostitutes but they are still clueless as to what it takes to form a true connection with another human being, therefore all they can settle for is easy sex to desperately fill a void.

 

men that advise men that are lost and feel unfulfilled by random sexual hook ups, to continue to do that while they wait for a good woman to come along are really doing them a disservice because all this does is it makes the man more detached from women and hence it makes his ultimate goal, to have a loving relationship, even more unattainable.

 

I think it is the dumbest advice to encourage a man that has too many one night stands as it is, to keep doing that.

[MrsHellnoFire]

well its the typical double standard that's been around for hundreds of years if not longer probably. men dont think that deep. he doesn't understand the hypocrisy.

[luvmy2ns]

well its the typical double standard that's been around for hundreds of years if not longer probably. men dont think that deep. he doesn't understand the hypocrisy.

 

I know plenty of men who can think deeply. THIS one obviously cannot.

[MrsHellnoFire]

I know plenty of men who can think deeply. THIS one obviously cannot.

 

it's my opinion that most dont especially at that age. it's a given.

[luvmy2ns]

it's my opinion that most dont especially at that age. it's a given.

 

What age would that be? Ice age? LMAO

[SugarKiss]

THIS one obviously cannot.

 

neither can the guy on page 11 who claims this whole topic was about "him" and advised another poor sod to keep doing what is obviously bringing him unhappiness

[MrsHellnoFire]

What age would that be? Ice age? LMAO

 

sorry, i was unaware of the age of the subject that the original poster was speaking. i was guessing teens to early twenties- the basic beer-drinking promiscuous male. maybe you've had better luck meeting solid men at that age than i did. for some men though, i mean even if they were born in the ice age 10000 year ago alive now, some people just dont change or care to! LOL! i think my take on it is a little biased though since men like that seem to sicken me.

[luvmy2ns]

sorry, i was unaware of the age of the subject that the original poster was speaking. i was guessing teens to early twenties- the basic beer-drinking promiscuous male. maybe you've had better luck meeting solid men at that age than i did. for some men though, i mean even if they were born in the ice age 10000 year ago alive now, some people just dont change or care to! LOL! i think my take on it is a little biased though since men like that seem to sicken me.

 

I have no idea how old he is, but he seems to be stuck in the Ice Age with his way of thinking.

[SugarKiss]

sorry, i was unaware of the age of the subject that the original poster was speaking. i was guessing teens to early twenties- the basic beer-drinking promiscuous male. maybe you've had better luck meeting solid men at that age than i did. for some men though, i mean even if they were born in the ice age 10000 year ago alive now, some people just dont change or care to! LOL! i think my take on it is a little biased though since men like that seem to sicken me.

 

 

I didn't see the original post directed at any age in particular, I think it was just directed at men who are promiscuous by nature and who don't change no matter what age they are. there are plenty guys like that in their 30's and 40's even so it's not age relevant.

 

I think is it is about immaturity but not about and actual number or age, it's attitude.

[Untouchable_Fire]

men that advise men that are lost and feel unfulfilled by random sexual hook ups, to continue to do that while they wait for a good woman to come along are really doing them a disservice because all this does is it makes the man more detached from women and hence it makes his ultimate goal, to have a loving relationship, even more unattainable.

I think it is the dumbest advice to encourage a man that has too many one night stands as it is, to keep doing that.

 

At this point in the conversation you should at least recognize that although this advice is generally crap, the end result is an absolute requirement.

 

A certain amount of detachment is essential! Otherwise you wind up like those poor sad sack guys who are super bitter and blame the whole female gender for their own personal failings. You can't find a loving relationship if you can't get a date.

[MrsHellnoFire]

What exactly do you think makes a "bar chick" easy and therefore undatable? Would the same go for women you meet in clubs? Where do you meet these "datable" women then? A coffee shop or the like? The type you are referring to exist everywhere.. I cannot say they are just secluded to bars nor are they the only ones who go to bars. I myself have had little experience with bars, but it just sounds too stereotypical to me. Maybe it is easy to bag chicks at bars and "bang" in the same night? I guess I would not have the authority to say either way but if you were looking for a serious relationship and think bars do not contain those types of women, why even go to them at all then? Waste of time?

With all of this promiscuity and the need to "bang lots of bar chicks" or whatnot, I guess I'm not surprised that 40-50 million !!! people in the US have herpes. I just wanted to mention that because it was a very surprising statistic to me.

[SugarKiss]

At this point in the conversation you should at least recognize that although this advice is generally crap, the end result is an absolute requirement.

 

A certain amount of detachment is essential! Otherwise you wind up like those poor sad sack guys who are super bitter and blame the whole female gender for their own personal failings. You can't find a loving relationship if you can't get a date.

 

 

I'm sorry but what end result are you talking about?

 

well why sleep with all those women in the first place that's the point?

why do you say a certain amount of detachment is required, pick women you can get to know on an emotional level and then sleep with them and if you do get attached then go with it rather than choosing women who you purposely have no desire to date.

 

your post doesn't really make sense, if you can't find a loving relationship if you can't get a date, what makes you think that sleeping around will get you a date when it's the guy that is deciding he doesn't even want to date the women he sleeps with????

 

I don't buy this nonsense that men need more sex than women I think women have just been opressed from expressing themselves sexually and society has defined both genders different sexually, I think we tend to have the same urges we just manifest them differently.

 

I found this study from 2003 it was an interesting read

 

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2003/07/030701220850.htm

[fishtaco]

Wow, this thread is not human, it will not die.

 

But these same men will recommend that guys sleep around anway. I find that extremely hypocritical

 

I have a comment for Fishtaco -

 

1. what makes you think this topic was about you?

 

In your point number 2 you realized this WAS in reference to my post, so I will not answer here.

 

2. but after reading the link to the other post you made your comments on, I can see that what Tomcat was talking about was pretty much what you told the other guy in the other situation to do and you jumped the gun here to defend yourself here because you did give hypocritical advice.

 

I don't know why you are backpeddling trying to defend yourself now making it seem like your words were taken out of contex, they were not. you told a guy that was used to sleeping with women at bars to go on doing that but to not consider those women for long term dating. no matter how you try to play it off now, that is what you said and I don't think that Tomcat was twisting anything you said out of context at all.

 

I read your link thanks for posting it seems pretty straight forward to me.

 

 

so even if she was talking about you in this post this is what you originally said:

 

"Bars are generally bad places to meet women for relationship purposes.

So before you find a good woman as a GF, keep banging the bar chicks. That way you still get laid while you're looking. Not a bad plan as far as I'm concerned."

 

First it was not hypocritical because I approve of women sleeping around until they find the right man as well.

 

Second I was not backpeddling, I still approve of men & women sleeping around until they find the right person. I even pointed out that not everyone is date-able due to compatibility issues, so it's up to them if they want to just leave, or bang then leave. Are you suggesting people have to date even if they are not compatible?

 

Third, it is taken out of context. Did you read the thread? Within the context of the thread we're talking about bar trash type bar women. I did not clarify what I meant by "bar chicks" because I didn't think I was writing a legal document, where I have to specify "within the context of this document, bar chicks means bar trash". If we have to do that with every single post, then we'd all be writing 20 page posts, and hiring someone to proof read them before we hit the submit button. The ONLY type of bar chicks mentioned in every single post before mine were about bar trash type women, not one post mentioned normal women that go to bars. Any mention of normal women that go to bars were mention only in this horrible mess of a thread.

 

As far as I can see you stereotyped all women that hang out at bars as bad so why are you trying to backpeddle now? doesn't matter how you explain it you are doing exactly what tomcat said in the first post,

you are -

telling a man to stay away from the types of women he himself is mimicking.

 

I see hypocricy in your advice no matter how you slice it.

 

Wow, I feel full from all the words you put in my mouth. Does it make you feel vindicated to mark me as someone that hate women that go to bars and give me a piece of your mind? If so I hope you feel satisfied. I don't stereo type women that go to bars. But if it makes you feel better, I can pretend I do.

 

Also, how do you know that the bar trashes want to date him or not? Seems to me he wants to date, it was those bar trashes that only want sex, he wants a relationship. Read his post again. I just said it was a good thing they don't want to date because he wouldn't want to date them anyway. What's this mimicking thing your talking about here? I see women that just want to bang and they get a kick out of it. Sorry but women that are like that don't exactly make good relationship partners. Why? Because they don't want a relationship.

 

What's this whole have more sex = detachment thing? I don't get it. I treat different people differently, based on the interaction. I treat crappy people like crap, and I treat good people well. That's like saying I find a person that's crap, so I treat them like crap, and you start claiming I treat everyone like crap. Maybe you have only one mode of operation but I don't.

 

If I meet a chick that only wants to bang, and I'm single and available and I find her physically attractive enough, I will do it. But that doesn't mean I'm going to treat the next chick the same way.

 

And going back to the guy that can't get dates. His problem isn't that he's banging bar trashes. His problem is that's the ONLY type of women he's meeting. So I gave him some other alternatives. I'm sure you conveniently ignored that part of the advice and assumed my advice is to keep banging bar trashes, because it can be used as fuel to your anger. Please use your reading comprehension. The advice of my post was meeting women else where, the keep banging bar trashes is "why not, you're already doing it, keep going, it doesn't hurt".

 

Why are you so angry and cherry picking things that will approve of your anger? Are you a bar trash? If not then what the heck are you complaining about?

[SugarKiss]

Wow, this thread is not human, it will not die.

 

 

 

In your point number 2 you realized this WAS in reference to my post, so I will not answer here.

 

 

 

First it was not hypocritical because I approve of women sleeping around until they find the right man as well.

 

Second I was not backpeddling, I still approve of men & women sleeping around until they find the right person. I even pointed out that not everyone is date-able due to compatibility issues, so it's up to them if they want to just leave, or bang then leave. Are you suggesting people have to date even if they are not compatible?

 

Third, it is taken out of context. Did you read the thread? Within the context of the thread we're talking about bar trash type bar women. I did not clarify what I meant by "bar chicks" because I didn't think I was writing a legal document, where I have to specify "within the context of this document, bar chicks means bar trash". If we have to do that with every single post, then we'd all be writing 20 page posts, and hiring someone to proof read them before we hit the submit button. The ONLY type of bar chicks mentioned in every single post before mine were about bar trash type women, not one post mentioned normal women that go to bars. Any mention of normal women that go to bars were mention only in this horrible mess of a thread.

 

 

 

Wow, I feel full from all the words you put in my mouth. Does it make you feel vindicated to mark me as someone that hate women that go to bars and give me a piece of your mind? If so I hope you feel satisfied. I don't stereo type women that go to bars. But if it makes you feel better, I can pretend I do.

 

Also, how do you know that the bar trashes want to date him or not? Seems to me he wants to date, it was those bar trashes that only want sex, he wants a relationship. Read his post again. I just said it was a good thing they don't want to date because he wouldn't want to date them anyway. What's this mimicking thing your talking about here? I see women that just want to bang and they get a kick out of it. Sorry but women that are like that don't exactly make good relationship partners. Why? Because they don't want a relationship.

 

What's this whole have more sex = detachment thing? I don't get it. I treat different people differently, based on the interaction. I treat crappy people like crap, and I treat good people well. That's like saying I find a person that's crap, so I treat them like crap, and you start claiming I treat everyone like crap. Maybe you have only one mode of operation but I don't.

 

If I meet a chick that only wants to bang, and I'm single and available and I find her physically attractive enough, I will do it. But that doesn't mean I'm going to treat the next chick the same way.

 

And going back to the guy that can't get dates. His problem isn't that he's banging bar trashes. His problem is that's the ONLY type of women he's meeting. So I gave him some other alternatives. I'm sure you conveniently ignored that part of the advice and assumed my advice is to keep banging bar trashes, because it can be used as fuel to your anger. Please use your reading comprehension. The advice of my post was meeting women else where, the keep banging bar trashes is "why not, you're already doing it, keep going, it doesn't hurt".

 

Why are you so angry and cherry picking things that will approve of your anger? Are you a bar trash? If not then what the heck are you complaining about?

 

 

yeah I read the thread there is nothing taken out of context, there are three posts, the original post which asks how can he find a girlfriend instead of just women who want to sleep with him, he also clearly states he hates one night stands and feels bad about them the next day, another post and then yours that says " DON'T date those chicks but keep banging them anyway.

 

 

yet the person who made the original post never once put down "those" chicks you did. so it seems to me you are the one with the problem.

 

the words in your mouth came from you, yet you are trying to blame everyone else for twisting your words around

 

Absolutely. You can't get a GF because you're meeting them at the wrong places. Trust me, you DON'T want to date those chicks.

 

Bars are generally bad places to meet women for relationship purposes.

So before you find a good woman as a GF, keep banging the bar chicks.

 

 

generalize much? those were your exact words, who is twisting your words around?

 

and given the continual use of the term "bar trashes" I think it is pretty clear who has the anger issues here and towards who.

 

I go to bars and have met guys I date at bars, and I am certainly no trash I have never gone home to have sex with a guy I met at a bar but I see plenty of guys that do that, would I rule out a guy I meet at a bar as a potential date, no way. would I think a guy at bar is trash, no not unless he is doing something trashy. but if a guy is good enough for me to take home and screw I would not turn around and call him trash for that but that's just me.

 

 

and what about if the person lived in England or any of the UK where bar culture is extremely strong I guess you would not be dating anyone at all then because most people hang out at bars there.

[sally4sara]

SugarKiss and Fishtaco,

 

I think this boils down to how we don't feel the effect of what we project as sensitively as the people exposed to it. A guy can say the views Fishtaco has advised and feel he isn't dishing out contempt because he doesn't feel the implications of his words as much as the women who hear his message. He also hasn't had to struggle with society attempting to make him feel ashamed of his sexual urges. It doesn't have to mean he feels satisfaction in the idea of women being viewed as low or trashy. For him it would just be a fact of life because it hinders him in no way to hold these views. Nothing has made him take stock of the effect of this view on women.

But I don't think it has to mean that he has a wish to "keep the women down". Its like what Stock said about how it doesn't bother him and he doesn't feel compelled to correct anyone about something that doesn't effect him. I don't agree with that stance but it isn't a tyrannical or evil one.

What people don't understand is that even though the common double standard view seems to only negatively effect women, it doesn't. The backlash is what we see all the time in the anti-feminist posts guys put on here at least once a month about self entitled, demanding women who are to blame for their recent failure to have a good relationship.

People don't seem to make the correlation between oppression of African Americans and the oppression of women. Women still couldn't vote for a while after that law was passed for African Americans to be able to do so. As a negative result of oppressing both interest groups, we see instances of over sensitivity to anything that could possibly be misconstrued as someone still holding "ignorant" ideals. Sometimes even the attitude of righteous dishing out of a poor treatment without recognizing that poor treatment will always be wrong even if it is in the name of restitution.

The result is a guy not recognizing the implications of his words because he has never been in the position of being wounded the same way.

SugarKiss - I don't think he meant any harm.

Fishtaco - try to recognize the deeper implications behind what you espouse.

Can we all kiss and make up now?

[Gawdess]

Women have the control, power over sex and therefore responsibility over sex.

 

Women must therefore act in a respectable way or men won't take them seriously sexually. Why would a man want to invest sexually in a woman who is not responsible with it..

 

Why do men think that women have all this control over sex? Men have control, also. This doesn't make any sense, especially because women enjoy sex as much as men. Men are more willing to sleep with pretty much anything with a vagina, though, and women are more selective with who they'll sleep with.

I think this is what this thread is getting at.

[MaxManwell]

Why do you guys insist on blaming men for something that is clearly not our fault ? Are you saying men should date the women you tell them to ?

 

1) Woman acts like a slut

2) Man won't date her.

 

How is it the mans fault that he decides who he wants to date ?

 

Just keep man hating ladies.

[Stockalone]

But I don't think it has to mean that he has a wish to "keep the women down". Its like what Stock said about how it doesn't bother him and he doesn't feel compelled to correct anyone about something that doesn't effect him. I don't agree with that stance but it isn't a tyrannical or evil one.

 

That is only true in this specific case, not in all aspects of my life. It's true that in this specific case, I don't consider it my problem (nor do I think it is such a huge problem at all anymore). I think women already "won the war" for equal rights. The men that are disrespecting women in the way we were talking about in this thread (believing that some women are good enough to f*** but not good enough to date) are in the minority. Those views will eventually become nearly extinct.

 

Women do have the power to deal with those men on their own and I further believe that women are best suited to fight those last few battles.

 

Sure, I can tell those men (and I do tell them) that what they do is wrong from my POV, but as long as they are able to find women to have sex with and/or date, how am I going to change their mind? I sympathize with the women's cause but I don't intend to fight these last few battles for them.

 

The way I see it, women (not other men) have the power to make those men with the wrong views rethink their approach. Stop dating them, and stop having sex with them. I think that would accomplish far more than other men telling them to stop because it isn't the right thing to do.

 

 

Regarding other topics, I frequently try to reason with other people in the hopes of changing their behaviour. However, how many racists, cheaters or sexists, etc. are going to change their mind through debate?

 

You can't persuade people who don't want to change their mind and it becomes impossible if there aren't negative consequences to their actions/views.

[serial muse]

Why do you guys insist on blaming men for something that is clearly not our fault ? Are you saying men should date the women you tell them to ?

 

1) Woman acts like a slut

2) Man won't date her.

 

How is it the mans fault that he decides who he wants to date ?

 

Just keep man hating ladies.

 

Man- and woman-hating aside, I think the question on the table is, if you sleep with lots of women (or men) that you think of as "sluts," how does that not make you one? Why, exactly, wouldn't you think of yourself in the same way?

 

It's not rocket science. It's just hypocrisy.

 

Either people are just sleeping together because they want to, without placing labels on their sex partners such as "slut," or they're being hypocrites about their role in the situation.

 

But the heartening thing is that, as Stockalone says, I think that this is something that is fading away. It's just frustrating when this hypocrisy rears its ugly head from time to time.

[MaxManwell]

Man- and woman-hating aside, I think the question on the table is, if you sleep with lots of women (or men) that you think of as "sluts," how does that not make you one? Why, exactly, wouldn't you think of yourself in the same way?

 

It's not rocket science. It's just hypocrisy.

 

Either people are just sleeping together because they want to, without placing labels on their sex partners such as "slut," or they're being hypocrites about their role in the situation.

 

But the heartening thing is that, as Stockalone says, I think that this is something that is fading away. It's just frustrating when this hypocrisy rears its ugly head from time to time.

 

The only hypocrisy is that women believe they should be allowed to sleep around and not be called sluts.

 

Things are changing but the fact is still inherent that most labeled sluts always will be women. Arguing that men are worse than women because of biological differences is a false pretense.

[MrsHellnoFire]

The only hypocrisy is that women believe they should be allowed to sleep around and not be called sluts.

 

 

 

 

Don't you think it is not gentleman-like to be calling women sluts? Did your parents ever teach you how to treat women?