Sw3etdev1L Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 Ok, so I sent him a message, after dating five times...and being rejected for being a "good girl"... and told him I just wanted to have fun and that I wanted to have a relationship based on fun and sex.. I just told him yesterday and I am dying of the nerves. He has not answered yet... he went into fbook and didn't answer me... I mean, will he call? will he not call???... I am soo freaking out. I mean what would a normal guy reaction would be if you were in his place? Link to post Share on other sites
jerbear Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 It depends on the friend. I have some friends I won't touch and hence they are friends. If he skipped you for fbook, he'll call but it won't be for fun and sex. After all you two are still friends. If I was interested in more, I would not turn to fbook, instead I would have had some fun sex. Link to post Share on other sites
BillClam Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 It depends on the friend. I have some friends I won't touch and hence they are friends. If he skipped you for fbook, he'll call but it won't be for fun and sex. After all you two are still friends. If I was interested in more, I would not turn to fbook, instead I would have had some fun sex. I'm totally behind the last statement. Fun sex isn't something most people text about unless they're already having it, it kind of just happens. Sometimes booze helps, sometimes getting alone with the person helps. Again, I have friends who are plenty attractive who I have no interest in, they're too much like sisters for me. Good luck with whatever you want I guess, don't however, substitute, or take less than you deserve. If you want a relationship, get one, if you honestly can say you want casual sex, do that, but don't sell yourself short. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sw3etdev1L Posted June 21, 2008 Author Share Posted June 21, 2008 Well, I texted him and I wanted to have a sex pal in facebook because.. when I was dating, this didn't ocurr to me. I mean... his father knows my aunt and... I wanted to give him a good impression. But instead of the good impression, he misunderstood my interests. so I erased his phone number then and that's it... but like I felt he liked me and wanted to have " fun " with me, instead of a formal relationship....well, I think I messed up. the thing is, I felt pressure in the dating process because I have always the feeling the dating is to be bfs y and bfs lead to marriage and... I have gone out with looots and lots of men, who really stress me out by wanting to know my family and s... and this time I didn't want to let this guy pass me by, I just want to have fun with him without the stress of dating.. I sent him the message on wednesday and today is saturday and I have not received an answer. I don't know what's going on. but I feel better by having done what I did than, not proposing nothing at all bcause I likehim, I just don't want to feel stressed out by dating Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Forgive me, do you see yourself as a bad girl in a sea of good men? IOW, you just want to have casual non-committal fun and all these guys are looking for someone to take home to momma and have babies with? Just trying to understand, as there's a good generation or two between us Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sw3etdev1L Posted June 22, 2008 Author Share Posted June 22, 2008 Carhill, ur so sweet. No, I didn't mean any of what you said. I just said I was looking for fun and freedom. I am not a bad girl, actually I am an excellent girl. I just like sex. I don't know you, I don't know if you are absolutely saintly and catholic, but I am jewish and I am very liberal....so. Nope... I am just wanting to have a non committed sexual relatinoship with a friend who I like Link to post Share on other sites
Sks Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Nope... I am just wanting to have a non committed sexual relatinoship with a friend who I like Your friendship wont last long if you do. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Nope... I am just wanting to have a non committed sexual relatinoship with a friend who I like Plse refer to your previous thread. This type of behaviour is not going to get you the type of man you're apparently looking for. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t154322/ Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 I don't know you, I don't know if you are absolutely saintly and catholic, but I am jewish and I am very liberal....so. .....Yeah, they thought they had me (private Catholic schooling), but nope, I'm too independent minded for that. No chance of joining my patron saint, I'm afraid There has been one thread which has run through a lifetime of female friendships and that has been, once a strong platonic friendship has been established, they (the ladies) will walk on hot coals before risking that friendship for romance/sex. I seem to have an intrinsic understanding of that dynamic (friends over lovers) so have respected that boundary, often to my detriment. Men, OTOH, don't seem to bond in the same way, and generally have no problem turning a friendship sexual and not lamenting the loss if it doesn't work out. Hope things work out! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sw3etdev1L Posted June 22, 2008 Author Share Posted June 22, 2008 Yeap carhill.. the thing is.. you know what? I am studying medicine...religious perception in me, in that matter has changed. I mean yes I am jewish but I don't take my religion seriously. I have more of a nature perspective of life. The thing is I believe.. we are all the same... of course right?, but at the same time I don't think we are much different than animals, relating ourselves in the cycle of life.. be bornt, live and reproduce yourself and then die. So, well..my perspective in hospital has been changed, whenever you see a sick sick person and another sick sick person, you just want to get out there and live hard party hard.. you know? taking care of yourself.. so many sick people with so many different religions.... I believe living and making yourself happy is the basis of life. so, this time I had this weird idea of changing things for me a little and offering a casual relationship with a boy I went out with for 5 times (he is in my jewish community) and people here in the jewish community, know everybody.. it's like if you'd live in a town and everyone knew what it was happening but in a huge city. so.... but thanks for answering and being so nice. Link to post Share on other sites
Sks Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Some Animals mate for life, so your analogy about them randomly ****ing isn't correct. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sw3etdev1L Posted June 22, 2008 Author Share Posted June 22, 2008 hehe, some animals mate for life?? tell me which ones don't? and did you know our genetic code is almost the same as dogs? check it out. open your mind a little, that is just my perspective I don't have to agree with you, & u don't have to agree with me. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Ok, so I sent him a message, after dating five times...and being rejected for being a "good girl"... and told him I just wanted to have fun and that I wanted to have a relationship based on fun and sex.. I just told him yesterday and I am dying of the nerves. He has not answered yet... he went into fbook and didn't answer me... I mean, will he call? will he not call???... I am soo freaking out. I mean what would a normal guy reaction would be if you were in his place? Humm... I'm sure he can sense your 'neediness'.. He probably knows that your 'fun and sex' means more 'love and sex' (read commitment)... he has rejected you for being a 'good girl' and NOW you come up as being a 'bad naughty girl'.. come on now.. I doubt he's that stupid.. My advice .. move on.. forget about him.. he's not 'digging' you at all... period. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Oh and I should add that sometimes, it's extremely hot for a guy to be told right off the bat that the woman wants to have sex with him.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sw3etdev1L Posted June 23, 2008 Author Share Posted June 23, 2008 You can say whatev u want.. but I already got my answer... and I was so right maybe I should write a book of how to be sweet and naughty... and have the boy you want in your pocket. hehe Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sw3etdev1L Posted June 23, 2008 Author Share Posted June 23, 2008 Besides being 23, and having two maids in a conservative environment is hard. I mean, if your parents are divorced and you have to be the housewive, belieeeve me you are NOT going to be searching for love. Because I am not searching to be the housewive of a hubby very soon. That creeps me out.. I just had to act sweet and innocent and with my values to see who this guy was.. now that I know, a little bit more of his essence. And I just want sex, then... there's nothing wrong with a relationship with him. ps... I can have whoever I want.. I just chose him. yeeeah. hehe! Link to post Share on other sites
Sks Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 hehe, some animals mate for life?? tell me which ones don't? and did you know our genetic code is almost the same as dogs? check it out. open your mind a little, that is just my perspective I don't have to agree with you, & u don't have to agree with me. Our genetic code is similar to most warmblooded animals, you want sex, you will get sex but you won't get respect or a relationship out of it. Your much more likely to get an STD. But as you stated, its your call - not mine. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sw3etdev1L Posted June 23, 2008 Author Share Posted June 23, 2008 Sks, you are so right. It's true we have to take care. This boy is not someone I don't know.. It is someone I dated, and whom my family knows, he knows who my family is, we have lots of friends in common. I dated him for a month, but I just didn't want to have sex or anything with him because I was taking anti depressives.. and I was feeling very insecure. I felt insecure, because the anti depressives lower your sexual drive..I thought my performance was going to suck. But a week ago, the doctor said I was fine and took them away from me. I aaam sooo happy to be fine again, you don't even imagine so.. Yes you are right, stds and whatev... but I know my situation is safe. I'll take care of myself and that is it.. I just want to have a party because my sexual drive is back. And you don't know how horrible it is to feel you've lost it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sw3etdev1L Posted June 23, 2008 Author Share Posted June 23, 2008 And one last thing... Good girl doesn't imply= Not getting laid. Because as long as I know I am a good woman, I go to the hospital, check out my patients, study, work hard, do exercise, don't do drugs or exceed alcohol, I don't cheat, or lie, I am an honest and loyal friend, I am a good daughter and a good sister..I am a good girl who likes sex.. which is absolutely normal. Good girls are always naughty. Not if you are frigid of course. And even if they don't say so, if they don't have sex, they masterbate. So, " the naughty in them is always present". Bad girl= A girl who steals, cheats, is a bad friend horrible daughter , sister, has done drugs, gets wasted and doesn't do a thing, doesn't work, goes out with many people at the same time, steals your boyfriend, has sex... sex doesn't make you bad or good... duh!!!, that's a stupid term, made by stupid people. sex was made to reproduce!!! or make love!!! reproduction... more spiritual: getting laid with soeone you love.... why don't u accept you all like sex equally as I do. I mean as long as you don't have a trauma, with yourself, with your religion or with your body... because then you're excused to think wrong about sex. Link to post Share on other sites
Sks Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 Yea sex does kinda determine what kind of person you are, I would never be interested in a relationship with a girl who has slept around allot. It shows who she is so to speak. Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 I can have whoever I want.. I just chose him. yeeeah. hehe! You may choose whomever you want but that doesn't necessarily mean you can have them. There are those who are already "taken" and there are those who won't find you attractive because you're not their "type." There are also those who have a very different moral code or set of vaues who will avoid you like the plague. Has your doctor considered the flip side of depression? Quite honestly, you sound a bit manic and acting out sexually can be one of its manifestations. In the end you may be and will be whomever you like but that doesn't guarantee you success with all men. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sw3etdev1L Posted June 23, 2008 Author Share Posted June 23, 2008 Well thanks for your opinions.. I think you are very critical though. My post was... I told him I wanted to have sex with him, when will he call?... this ended way on another point of a conversation and actually I felt it kind of weird..because we don't even know each other and being judged by strangers it's not very nice... anyway. Thanks for your comments.. long post eeeih.? actually? why are you here?? what kind of problems do you have??? Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 Well thanks for your opinions.. I think you are very critical though. My post was... I told him I wanted to have sex with him, when will he call?... this ended way on another point of a conversation and actually I felt it kind of weird..because we don't even know each other and being judged by strangers it's not very nice... anyway. Thanks for your comments.. long post eeeih.? actually? why are you here?? what kind of problems do you have??? Why are you here? To read what you posted, the world is your oyster and life couldn't be better. Problems? Do I have to have problems to post here? Well, if I do it's likely because I'm old, have five children, four of whom are older than you, have two stepdaughters, six grandchildren, three step-grands and am on my second marriage which puts two "significant" women in my life. Until three weeks ago I also had two mothers-in-law -- a former who still claimed me and a current who hated me. She's the one who is no longer with us! Back to your issue. Rather than being critical I actually find your post and your approach rather sad. That's likely a product of my age and the fact that I span seven decades as well. Times they are-a changin', and not necessarily for the better, dontcha know! But all that aside, enjoy your youthful exuberance while you can, youngster. Just try to do so in ways that won't come back and haunt you later and will let you forever always look back and honestly say, "No regrets!" I doubt very much that having been able to have sex with whomever you wanted will be a lesson you'll be likely to willingly pass on to your own children and grandchildren or one that you'll want to reflect upon and make much of with an eventual husband. But that's just a guess on my part. Link to post Share on other sites
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