GuttedEnglishBloke Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Just wondered if anyone has ever had their ex call up months after and want you back - even if they left you for someone else? I've not heard from mine for nearly a month. Would love to hear from her in time with the tables turned in my favour. This thought is the only thing that gets me through the bad days. Link to post Share on other sites
jerbear Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Some did try to contact me to get a "hi how are you" In all honesty, I got one that did that six years later after she had kids and divorced the guy. I one month or 1 year is a long time but six years plus kids and divorce; NEXT! I should have changed my phone number. Link to post Share on other sites
Kman21 Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Well mines left me for someone else, it was a "clean" break up, she emailed me a "how r u" after one month of NC. Would she come back? I highly doubt and if she does, would I want to take her back and be second best? I think not. Link to post Share on other sites
serratededges Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I broke up with him because he had wanted marriage and children. I had just turned 21. I went back to him one year later. We were happy for three years. I ended up moving for my job, but it was the best thing i ever did, so it could happen. I don't know how likely it is that it will, but I have hope too that maybe my ex will come back. Then again I am just finishing the denial stage. Link to post Share on other sites
saraispiel19 Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 yup. they come back they always come back. Link to post Share on other sites
Love_Forest Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I had an ex who came back after 3 years and I accepted to meet him, ..he was so up to for a new begin but I when I meet him I did not feel anything for him... nothing...nothing....not trace of our old relation... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kyta Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 id like to think they come back,my xwife after 2 yrs came back and told me she still loved me, (she went off with some one else) i told no chance, i had moved on, my present x partner, has come back to me everytime, this time i dont think she will, and i dont want to be back with her metaly, but my heart craves for her, but each case is diffrent, every time we got back together, it wasnt long b4 i felt the same again, she want willing to change or put us first, the best thing is not to hold on to hope of them coming back, that slows the process, i nkow im not moving on as yet, but whenu start to move on and get on with ur life, and if they see it, then thats when they want to come back normally, they dont like it that u can move on, they like to see u down, not coping, they build them selves on the fact that they are important to you, and if u cant do with out them they thrive on it, but to see u move on and be happy without them, well they change then, they have nothnig to draw from, and theywant u back, not in all cases but most of the time. Thats from my experiences and what i have seen from other ppl. Link to post Share on other sites
joejoechen Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 They do come back, well, not all of them of course. One month is still good if you will want to have your ex back.. have you been dating other people during this period? I mean, it's a good thing you do, i'll tell you why when i have more time. Please, keep us posted. I want to help you. Joe Link to post Share on other sites
Love_Forest Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 sometimes we have more ex.... I think almost everyone has more than one.... I believe we do not want all of our ex's back... How do we "choose" what ex we want to come back? Link to post Share on other sites
joejoechen Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I think that question is a question only you yourself can answer it. List out the goods and bads of your ex, do you like him the way more than you hate him in the other? Can you tolerate his bad habits IN THE LONG RUN? Don't just try to get him back for the love, look realistic. List them down and evaluate your future wife or husband.. Joe Link to post Share on other sites
PhoenixFromTheFlames Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 For me 2 out of 3 have returned. The first guy I broke up with and we remained friends. A couple of months after we split I met someone else. When I told my ex, he then started to chase me. He told me I had to choose, and I chose the new guy. The relationship was bad, and I left for a really good reason (abusive). The second situation, he broke up with me. He returned 3.5 months later saying he made a mistake. We got back together. The third is my recent ex, who has vanished and has not come back. With both of the ones who came back and wanted to try again, they only did so once i'd moved on. In the first situation, i'd met someone else and that was the catalyst for him to try to rekindle something. In the second situation, I was no longer hoping he'd come back. I was ready to love again, and was starting to look for love again. I had been single the whole time we were apart, but my attitude had significantly changed in the weeks before his return. I suppose the answer is a really grey 'sometimes'. Mine have only come back when when I've stopped clinging to the past, and started working on MY future. In both returns though, the break-ups didn't involve other people. Link to post Share on other sites
BillClam Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Dude, I am and am not in the same boat, for a lack of better words. I too, have some threads asking for help over a girl I still obviously have feelings for, but I can tell you it does get better. Sure, right now judging by my post, I'm doing awful, but really, I'm better then I was at the epicenter. At the beginning, I was all like "I'm only going to keep doing what I do in hopes that she comes back!" But honestly, I now know I need to improve on certain aspects of myself, that way, I can be the person she fell in love with, and more, and if she doesn't come back still? Tough cookies I guess, but now you've made them lose even more. Fake it 'till you make it. Tell yourself you're better off, become better off. Link to post Share on other sites
Author GuttedEnglishBloke Posted June 22, 2008 Author Share Posted June 22, 2008 Sounds to me like they only come back if they haven't found someone else. I suspect I'll hear from my ex in a couple of years' time. I don't think her new relationship will last and I suppose she'll contact me when that one is over. I'll give them about 18 months. In the meantime, I'm trying to enjoy being single although sometimes I think I'm kidding myself. I'm currently trying to gather enough motivation to try internet dating - I just hope I'm far enough on not to be sat there on a date, comparing them with my ex. Most of my pain comes from the fact that I don't particularly miss her, I just miss being in a relationship. It doesn't help that I am painfully shy. I'm not good at picking up girls in bars, never have been. Oh well. Link to post Share on other sites
alphabetsoup13 Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 I've known both males and females that left their gfs/bfs for other people and most of them tried to come back from what i heard. However, it was after a long period time (anywhere from 3 years to 16 years) and the other had moved on most of the time. One of those couples actually got married and are living happily right now. It really depends on your situation but one thing is for sure: it takes time, and often the person waiting for their dumper to come back has moved on. Link to post Share on other sites
Love_Forest Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 you mean the person who initiate broke-up most of the time is not moving on, but the person who was dumped most of the time is moved on....? I know someone who keep the pictures and the contact detail of all his ex-s, and i was always asking myself why because he was the person who dumped them. Nowdays the women are married and with children and he always is trying to have contact with their children now, to be friend with them, he goes to the wedding of their children...I really did not understand why since he dumped them...why to go there to see them again .....moreover he does not talk to the ex-s but only to the children...what is the ponit here? what to want to see them although their married with kids and do not talk to you.... Link to post Share on other sites
YoMamma Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 This is an interesting thread and it makes me smile a little. There is hope, not the "let's get back together and work it out kind of deal" but my ex was one of the most important people once in my lifetime and if he randomly pops back in my life years down the line, honestly, I think I would be happy. I don't know if I take him back but it would be a good validation that he did care about me and that I actually did mean something to him. And I believe that's all I wanted, oh that and a freakin' apology for hurting me so much And of course a lot of situations are different. I don't think he's ever coming back and I don't think he will ever contact me. It's whatever dude, it was his loss anyway. And you know what? Good riddance! I don't need *******s in my life anyway LOL I'm doing my best to move on and living my life the best I can and being the best person I can. And one day my ex will think of me and miss me and on that one day, it will be his turn to cry for losing me :laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
sid3 Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 Sometimes they come back, only to see if they still can get a reaction out of you and to cause more hurt...... Link to post Share on other sites
Love_Forest Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 so sad what you said sid3, but most of the time is true. Link to post Share on other sites
alphabetsoup13 Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 "Don't worry about the future. Worrying is as effective as trying to solve and algebra equation by chewing bubble gum" -Baz Luhrmann Link to post Share on other sites
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