Jilly Bean Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Im relatively new to this saga, but have heard you all mention DG from time to time on other threads. Question - was A actually ever involved with this guy? Or, has it all been fantasy from the get-go? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 What happens if you continue to write and he never writes you back, and that upsets you, to the point of wanting to get into your car and driving to Denver again. No, I went to Denver because I never got to say goodbye and the gf got in between our emails. She blocked our communications (and he let her of course). He he doesn't want to write then I might pester him some more but that's it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 He doesn't owe you a big long explanation or detailed reasons why he doesn't want to have a romantic relationship with you. Him telling you this should be enough. He doesn't need to explain himself to you Ariadne. I just did that to get him to keep on writing. He needs me too because I'm also his drug. He loves my emails and it's going to be very hard for him to resist. So he'll find a way to make me believe that he is attracted. Unless things have changed, but I doubt. Then, I'll go there. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 But you should understand that I'm not looking for a romantic relationship with you It bears repeating..... over and over.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 It bears repeating..... over and over.... ................. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 then I might pester him some more but that's it. If you respect him and love him, then you would NOT pester him. This is not love though, it's UNhealthy, selfish obsessed love. I just did that to get him to keep on writing. He needs me too because I'm also his drug. He loves my emails and it's going to be very hard for him to resist. So he'll find a way to make me believe that he is attracted. Unless things have changed, but I doubt. Then, I'll go there. This is so wrong on so many levels Ariadne. I hope someday you get the help you need because if you show up in Denver, he WILL call the police and get a restraining order against you. I also hope he is reading this thread because right now he SHOULD be scared of this reply of yours. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 But you should understand that I'm not looking for a romantic relationship with you You can roll your eyes at me Ariadne.. but these words are right from his fingers.. I did not make them up and they are not fantasy.. They are his feelings... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 I hope someday you get the help you need because if you show up in Denver, he WILL call the police and get a restraining order against you. I meant if we keep on writing... of course. You people are confused already. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 You people are confused already. No.. you are confused Ariadne.. Read below.. But you should understand that I'm not looking for a romantic relationship with you Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 You can roll your eyes at me Ariadne.. but these words are right from his fingers.. I did not make them up and they are not fantasy..They are his feelings... Well, if they are then I don't want anything to do with him "either". Anyway, I'm off to work. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 No, that was directed at me, I misunderstood her wording of I'll go there. I thought she meant she'd go to Denver but now I see she meant something else. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Well, if they are then I don't want anything to do with him "either". Ariadne, there is no IF. Those ARE his feelings and he told you that he is NOT wanting a relationship, romantic or otherwise with you. It's as plain as day and I really don't understand WHY you can't see that? Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Well, if they are then I don't want anything to do with him "either". Anyway, I'm off to work. They are... Here look at what he wrote you..: But you should understand that I'm not looking for a romantic relationship with you It bears repeating..... over and over.... Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=81751 What he is telling you now is NO different than what he told you 2 years ago in February. A, go back and re-read ALL your older threads. Look where you are today..Still hanging on, waiting for answers - Which he HAS given you, over and over again. Link to post Share on other sites
Nevermind Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Originally Posted by whichwayisup Yes he wrote..But that email you got from him is more than likely the last one you're going to receive from him. Well, if it is then I'll move on. But I'll make sure he keeps on writing.Whom are you kidding? Touche: I don't like DG, and I certainly question his sense of style, but this e-mail was not bad. He simply didn't write it in a mean way, but I now doubt that he really wrote this to keep her going. Also, reading Ariadne's posts make me question wether she would "get it" if he used meaner words. I seriously doubt it. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 He simply didn't write it in a mean way, He was clear about it too...nice but clear.. But you should understand that I'm not looking for a romantic relationship with you It bears repeating..... over and over.... Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Art, I think Ariadne doesn't care if she has a romantic relationship with him. She's just happy that contact has been reinstated. She's happy that they have connected. She'll accept being a pen pal, a friend, anything as long as he is a part of her life. This she has made very clear. I personally couldn't be friends with someone I was smitten with but hey, I guess some people can or think they can at any rate. Link to post Share on other sites
Nevermind Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 marlena: He is my drug. But I have to know that he loves me/is attracted. She does care. And she doesn't care for friendship. Art: We are on the same page about DG... Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 She does care. And she doesn't care for friendship. Well, she has said that she is happy that he is writing, that she would be his servant, that she would love to have him as a friend or pen pal. She is confused. Link to post Share on other sites
Walking away Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 I can't believe that there is another thread about this same mess. There is something very wrong about this situation on so many levels. It almost reads like a fiction because this stuff is too nuts for real life. Really, it is.... And, we all know by now that Ariadne won't listen to a word that anyone is saying. She is wrapped up her in own little world. In this situation, she appears to have gone crazy. And you can't fix crazy. WA Link to post Share on other sites
vivrantflo Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 I can't believe that there is another thread about this same mess. There is something very wrong about this situation on so many levels. It almost reads like a fiction because this stuff is too nuts for real life. Really, it is.... And, we all know by now that Ariadne won't listen to a word that anyone is saying. She is wrapped up her in own little world. In this situation, she appears to have gone crazy. And you can't fix crazy. WA I couldn't have said that better myself. Link to post Share on other sites
Jilly Bean Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 I really came in the middle of this movie. Can someone please tell me if they ever actually dated or were involved? Link to post Share on other sites
Storyrider Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 Art, I think Ariadne doesn't care if she has a romantic relationship with him. She's just happy that contact has been reinstated. She's happy that they have connected. She'll accept being a pen pal, a friend, anything as long as he is a part of her life. Exactly. Ariadne knows how to spin gold from straw. And she's relatively happy doing it. Fantasy is reality enough for her. But, Ariadne, if you think you can "make" him do anything or feel anything, you're wrong about that. Either he does, or he doesn't. Are you being honest that if he doesn't, you'll move on? Or do you actually want to draw him into a long conversation about it? I really came in the middle of this movie. Can someone please tell me if they ever actually dated or were involved? I think she saw him two or three times, for about a week or so each time. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 26, 2008 Author Share Posted June 26, 2008 Ok you guys, This is it. I wrote those emails to Denver guy this morning hoping that he'd say something that would justify writing to him. But there isn't anything else to say... I wrote to him again and told him that he didn't need to respond to that. I am absolutely nothing to him. He cares for me like he cares for "fellow human being". And of course, there is nothing else to talk about with him, either. Before, we shared, but now that it is completely pointless. I'm not going to write to some guy just because. I don't write to anybody. And I can't possibly put him through that drag. My fantasy worked because I believed he loved me. But now, my fantasy is gone. There is no fantasy. No more Denver guy. Link to post Share on other sites
bebos Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 Letting go of your fantasy will be tough. You asked me in your other thread if I ever fell out of love with the guys I'd obsessed about for years (at separate times, of course). The answer is yes, absolutely yes. And you will too. I'd recommend looking at why you were so caught up in obsession anyway. It's never about the men, it's only about what's going on inside you that needs that sort of addiction. Like I said before, obsession is not different from being addicted to drugs, gambling, food, etc. There's an emptiness and a longing to fill it. The emptiness comes from crappy things in your past that you can't see or even feel anymore. But those crappy things have left a scar in the form of keeping you addicted to a fantasy life. Now would be a great time to figure out why you want that in your life. I get the sense from other posts that therapy is out of the question for you? That's a bummer, because it's a short cut to changing your relationship with the emptiness. Once you figure out why it's there, you can figure out how not to need it anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
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