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Mixed signals - Friends?


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I met this girl a few months ago in class and we became study partners seeing each other at least weekly for class. During these sessions we became fairly good friends and she would tell me things that she wanted to be kept secret.

 

About a month ago I invited her on what I would consider a date to a baseball game and she had agreed. I had grown attracted to her during out study dates and wanted to take it to the next level. During this "date" I found out she had just starting dating someone else but she didn't consider him serious (she told me this strait up).

 

We continued to meet up for coffee and movies where I became more of a trusted guy friend and she would vent her frustration on various things including her now BF (he's always studying and apparently doesn't talk much). I had blown off the idea of dating her at that point though but enjoyed her company.

 

Two weeks ago she invited me to help take her sister to a local theme park. While at the park I found out I was her first choice for the outing because she considers myself the most fun of anyone she knows at the moment (Including her BF). I did notice she wasn't shy about contact during that trip and would lean on me etc during lines.

 

During the trip I invited her over for dinner later in the week (this week) were we made pasta then watched a movie in my room. She took over 2 hours to get ready to come over (She called me when she was getting ready ... where in the past when meeting to study she would normally take 30 minutes or so) and she was wearing perfume when she normally does not.

 

No contact was made during the movie though, she seemed to keep a few inches away from me on the bed and either had her hands on her stomach or crossed on her chest.

 

Anyways my question is this: Are we just friends? Or could there be potential for more.

 

The mixed signals are killing me ... If we were just friends why is she caring so much about her appearance recently?

 

Should I break contact with her for a week or so to build up tension on her part? I don't want to come off as needy or wussy.

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It is pretty clear what's happening here. She saw you as a trusted buddy, confiding in you, but has now started developing feelings for you. The interest in her appearance is really obvious. Although interaction between the two of you was free and easy before, it has become awkward and tense due to her strong feelings of physical attraction and anticipation. She kept her distance and seemed closed off from you during the movie because she was nervous and waiting for you to make the move bro! I mean, she put perfume on for you! Go for it!

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It looks like you're a friend. She talks to you about bf problems and she seems too comfortable around you (I've found girls who have bf to do that). As for the perfume thing, 2 hrs to get ready and come over could be translated she spent time with the boyfriend before going to your place.

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As for the perfume thing, 2 hrs to get ready and come over could be translated she spent time with the boyfriend before going to your place.

 

Yea he was out of town until today. I do notice she is still secretive about text's to him. Her conversations about him are minimum at best when we are around. She as stated she considers her relation with him becoming more friends then anything (I believe she asked him if she could date other people).

 

They've only been dating for 2 months or so ... nothing really compared to her last relationship which I think was 2.5 years.

 

 

Thanks for the replies btw.

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Let her go, dude. I made the same mistake with a girl recently. I was the fool, and I should have known better. :confused:

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She has definitely grown more interested in you! A girl who cares more about her appearance is a sure sign. And if she asked her BF about dating other people (and told you this) there is another huge signal. She says your fun, she looks and smells good for you, and likes her BF as just a "friend"...she wants you to make a move!

 

You should ask her out to dinner or something that allows you to talk, and either go in for the kiss (and I'd doubt she's mind), or tell her you've wondered about the two of you being more than friends, and ask her what she thinks about it. I don't think you'd regret it.

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Thanks everyone for the responses this site has helped me :-)

 

To give a update I texted her Saturday afternoon to see if she wanted to do something and haven't heard back from her which is slightly unusual (She would normally respond immediately or later in the day).

 

She did warn me on the day she came over for the movie that she probably couldn't do anything over the weekend but I'm still slightly surprised she didn't let me know she was busy (which she would normally do)

 

I've got plans to visit the some museums in town this weekend that she had expressed interest in going. I think I'll call her up this Thursday and see what happens. Hopefully she will respond this time :-/

 

In the meantime I'm taking some other advice and going for a coffee date with someone else on Tuesday.

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