Should I be upset that they still hang out now or am I just being irrational?

[escol]

My current boyfriend had a previous "friends with benefits" situation. He ended that before we got together and she has since "moved on" and has a boyfriend. When we first started dating, I told him to spend one night a week with her because I knew they spent so much time together before and would get upset that I stole all of his time. The problem is she has since told him how much she still likes him and her public jealousy makes it uncomfortable for us a couple to hang out with her . I have told him how much this upsets me but I don't force the issue since I don't want to tell him what to do. The question is should I be upset that they still hang out now or am I just being irrational?

[Tony T]

YOU ASK: "The question is should I be upset that they still hang out now or am I just being irrational?"

 

I don't know about you, but I don't like to upset myself. Now, you are the one who encouraged his continued involvement with this lady. In your post, you said she now has a boyfriend. If that's the case, what is she doing expressing feelings for your boyfriend.

 

Once she crossed that line, he should have backed off big time. When some women (and I'm not exactly sure of the number) have sex with a man, even in a friendship with benefits situation, a bond is formed and some (I'm not sure just what percentage) even fall in love with the guy...consciously or subconsciously. So now these feelings are coming out.

 

She's a real turkey for interfereing with his current relationship. I would have a talk with your boyfriend and resolve this situation quickly. There is no good reason why you should have to put up with this kind if situation and no reason for him to keep her around at this point. Besides, now that she has expressed these feelings for him it would be disrespectful to you and his relationship with you to keep contact with her, in my opinion.

 

I think it was very nice of you to give your guy permission to see his ole sex buddy one night a week...but I don't think you'll do that ever again.