rockdragon20 Posted July 12, 2008 Share Posted July 12, 2008 Well, this is how it started, I will get to the real deal after this part is explained... A couple weeks ago me and my sister went to a parade with one of her friends-- now, my work buddy said he was going to the parade, and we pretty much planned to meet up one way or another, but when I called him that day apparently he was a few blocks down from where my sister met up with her friend. I tried to get my sister to go meet up with him, but she was very resistant, saying it was too far away. That's fine, and we stayed put. I'm certain that a couple days before I told her that my friend would be at the parade, implying if not saying that I wanted to hang out with him too. After the parade we walked around booths and everything--and silly me, I totally forgot about the blazing sun and didn't even put on suntan lotion. I didn't realize this until I started to feel nauseous (I get sunsick easily), and I started telling my sister how I really wanted an icecone or whatever (as it helps cool me down), and I told her two or three more times but she pretty much ignored it. Anyways, after her friend left we went back to her apartment and got some cool drinks. I felt awful (my shoulders were sooo burned up!) and went to lay down on her couch and I complained about how awful I felt. Yeah I was definitely whining, and she started to act odd, so I asked her what was going on, and she blew up at me and told me what a brat I was and that I act like a princess and I constantly whine all the time. I told her I was a little upset about how she blew me off, first with me meeting my friend and then with the icecone, which are totally miniscule things, but if you know her history of many, many times of blowing me off for the stupidest stuff, it builds up after a while. I know it's stupid, but I feel like she's never there for me. I realize I've treated her like **** for a long time, because of our family history, for a long time seemed like she wasnt part of our family anymore. I have never discussed these feelings with her, as it seemed to me like she would just blow me off--this is based off of hinting at certain subjects to her, and her not taking me seriously when I tried. This is probably why she told me, I don't remember her exact words, something about not being up front and saying things loudly enough. When someone tells you a certain thing three or four times, isn't that a hint? I don't want to have to yell it in front of her face. Maybe I need to speak up more, but it seems like she needs to listen more as well. I have asked her why she is never serious with me, and her response was that is because she has to be serious everywhere else--which doesn't seem to be the case with me, but of course I have no clue for sure, I don't follow her around while she's living her life. In addition to not speaking up, I have huge problems with corresponding my feelings to someone else, out loud. So, stupidly, I just walked out of her apartment and refused to say anything, because I felt sick to my stomach, physically and otherwise. I haven't talked to her in two weeks-- the next day after the fight I did text her, texting because I was too scared to call her, and apologized profusely saying I had all these bottled feelings that I was unconciously taking out on her, and she replied with a "whatever." She has called me one more time to which I didn't pick up because I was at work, and never called her back. Now, I have no idea how to approach the problem. Although very loving and motherly, she can be patronizing and expects to know everything adult, and views me as a stupid kid, pretty much. I am so torn up about it, I know I have let this sit too long and now I'm just at a loss. She used to be my closest friend before many family situations went down, I don't know how to ask her to look at things from my point of view too, and just to try and pay attention to me. Please, if you can say anything at all, just say it... I hate fighting with her, I love her so much... Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted July 13, 2008 Share Posted July 13, 2008 First off, tell her you love her and you two need to start getting along better. Take it from there and do it in baby steps. DO not put blame on her, put the blame on both of you... You two will have a close relationship one day, it'll just take some work to get there. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts