Contradicting girl..

[Booker43]

I'm 21 years old and I'm currently in my first long term relationship. I've had a few flings and near-relationships here and there but nothing official like I'm in now.

 

We're at 5 months, and she's absolutley wonderful. She's completely head over heels for me and anybody whos so much as talked to her will tell you that.

 

So why am I posting here? I met her in residence and I was going into my second year she was going into her first. At the very beginning of the year she kind of got around. The first night she spent in some low life guys room, the next night we had seen her dancing very, very dirty with a different guy. A week or so later she was nearly involved in a threesome with another lowlife guy. I don't know the whole story, she talks about it like it she was almost taken advantage of, but I know for a fact she made out with the other girl involved that night. Either way, it seemed she was with a different guy ALL the time, and i'll be honest, we had actually labeled her the house slut.

 

I didn't think much of it. People do stupid stuff in their first few weeks of university, I know I did. It's the time where your allowed to make all those dumb mistakes and not have to worry about it later.

 

The contradiction here, was that every single time I saw her, or spoke to her (which was very little before we dated), she was so quiet and innocent. Her favorite past time is reading, and she loves to act and write herself. She's very smart, a Dean's list student. She doesn't know I know anything about the beginning of the year. But everytime we talk about her past and all that it always seemed like she was the quiet innocent one. Over time I learned she had several boyfriends in high school, she had been sexually active since high school. (Don't know or want to know how far back)

 

See none of this would be a problem for me if I KNEW thats what the girl was like. But there are girls who brag about their promiscuity who have had far less experience then my girlfriend, who's admitted she's intimidated by girls like that. That seems so weird.

 

Everything about our relationship has been perfect, it really has. But sometimes I wonder if it's really her that I'm dating, and not who she knows I'd want her to be. Because her personality really contradicts the facts.

 

The only thing I can think of that would make this make sense is the fact that she is extremely naive. She believes almost everything she's told, plain and simple. That's what scares me a bit.

 

I want to know, should I be worried? Since we've been dating she hasn't done anything but further solidfy the fact that she isn't a cheater. But she also hasn't been out much, she hasn't been hit on alot yet but that will happen once the school year starts and she's back in res.

 

Basically to sum it up, her past mixed with her naivity gives me a constant little fear in the back of my mind that I have something to worry about. I'd like it to go away.

[Javelin]

You said,

 

Everything about our relationship has been perfect, it really has.

 

and

 

Since we've been dating she hasn't done anything but further solidify the fact that she isn't a cheater.

 

Okay, her life before you, is her own business, period. You knew about these encounters to an extent, since you and your friends gave her a title. Now you're with her, so get over it! It's unfair of you to judge her past and since she has proved that you CAN trust her.

 

What are you worried about? Actually, let me answer the question for you... Nothing!

 

P.S. - One more thing,

 

I would suggest you talk to her about the way you feel. When people are worried about things it begins to show in their character and it can make the relationship feel a bit uneasy. Discuss the way you feel with her, trust me, she won't throw you out the window.

[Spectre]

I don't know why you would get involved in a long term relationship with a girl labeled as a slut..and not talk to her about it before it got serious.