cybersmurf Posted August 5, 2003 Share Posted August 5, 2003 Hi everyone After 6 months of great and intense relationship, me and my girlfriend were experiencing some lowdowns because I were having trouble with some of her behaviors. At this time, we decided to continue (after a serious discussion). It was going well and then problems cames again a couple of weeks later. She is in fact upset that I wanted her to change her attitude. We got some frequent fights in the last 2 months about some misunderstood. I did not really asked her to change, but I told her how much I founded hard for myselft to deal with some of our differences. She seems to put the ''couple'' relationship behind a lot of things that I founded less important. She is more independent than me but I was adjusting myself a lot recently. She changed a lot for herself too, and mostly because she loved myself enought to do so. But now, 2 months later, we are now on a temporary break. She nearly broke up with me last week when we got a fight (it was really my fault, i pushed her to the limits in a circumstancial bad mood we were both having). But just after she asked me to broke I changed her mind so she asked me to take 2-3 weeks of reflexion instead. She said she wanted to thinks about it and that she needs time to recover. I though maybe she was not serious, that she was being transported throught bad emotions that night. But the morning after, I talked to her and she was really cold and severe with me. Well, i guess i could take a lot of credit for that. She asked me to respect the 2 weeks break and i went out telling her i loved her and that i will be waiting for her call. She will probably never call me back and I don't know what to do. She loved me real hard, we were having a lot of fun together except for those small exception fights. I feel she was already trying to move out from me the last morning I saw her (4 days before today). She is trying to see if she can live without myself and I'm afraid she will found so because she is very capable. I know I did the things wrong, especially that night when we were exarcerbed, and I know I could have been a lot more patient with her. Now that I was finally started to think I could do so, we got this fight and everything exploded on her side. I don't know what to do but i have the feeling waiting after those 2 weeks could be catastrophic. I miss and love her a lot and I would like to do something before it's too late. Please tell me what are your thougts ? Link to post Share on other sites
wicklunb Posted August 5, 2003 Share Posted August 5, 2003 I know what you are going through. I am going through something very simular(See my post under breaking up titled " Is it over or can we have what we once did?). In my case I took all the little things for granted and that caused her to close up and like you stated to act coldy toward me. She also has other things going on in her life that magnify my selfishness and unsupportiveness. Looking back I was very selfish. This may not be the case with your situation but I have found that women are very sensitive to our thoughts and especially our words. We can't take our actions back. My advice and I know I am probaly the last person that needs to be giving you advice is to let her know how you feel and give her some space to reflect and if she and if she wants to she will call you. What's going to happen between the two of you is going to happen and it could cause things to become worse if you call and constantly bring up the relationship or try and see her when she is not ready. In my case I sent an email telling her how I felt and she opened up and told me exactly what I needed her too in regards to how she felt and why. It really opened my eyes. It is hard for me to give you alot of advice in your case because you didn't give any info on why she felt she was acting the way she was. You may not be less important than other things in her life it may be that they are also very important to her. I am not sure if any of this helps you but I can feel your pain. I wish the both of you the best. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cybersmurf Posted August 10, 2003 Author Share Posted August 10, 2003 Thanks Wicklung for trying to help. I am hoping we both get luck in our future or actual relationship. We juste have to learn from this and become better that before. You were right about the email. I should send her something to her to know were she exactly is now. After i could adjust myself. Is it too fast (10 days after she asked...) ? However, i'm affraid she already made her choice. I already fell being rejected but i'm gonna give it a last shot. Take care Link to post Share on other sites
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