trust

[billy]

anyone out there that can help please assist. long story, i had alengthy marriage that ended in 95' didnt date very much until i met heather in fall of 98', i fell madly for her. i courted her and we beagn dating and our relationship matured. she began spekaing a great deal about a female in her office that was having an affair w/ the dr. however it seemed to me that she was telling her story. i confronted her about it, which she denied,but when her ex was back in town last sept. his sister had made a remark about her having an affair w/ the dr. since they dont speak much it seemed like a wild accustaion, but heather and zacks(ex) ssiter did speak for a while until his sis caused trouble so for her to amke such a remark. well i guess i have issues witht this and she hasnt mentioned it since. and recently she went out w/ some friends, and danced, i dont have problems with her out w/ friends but dancing w/ other men i find innappropriate as i wouldnt engage in that myself. please shed a light on this.

[Tony T]

There are some basic differences between you and your girlfriend that you need to pay attention to. Certain of your values seem to clash. She seems a bit of a free spirit. Forget the affair with the doctor...it happens all the time between doctors and office help. You'll never know one way or the other so just trust her story on that one. This girl is not going to be controlled by you and would resent you asking her not to dance with guys when out with friends.

 

Dancing with a strange man is pretty harmless in and of itself. It is no indication of a desire she has for another man, though it may show that you don't take her out dancing enough.

 

Bottom line. If you don't trust her to be faithful to you, let her go and find another woman. There are lots of girls that won't even look at another man, won't go out with friends, will stay home and knit, cook, clean and do whatever with you. There aren't too many of them and you may not find them interesting.

 

Start building confidence in yourself...trust your lady...and if you find in the future that her behavior is not to your liking, S P L I T.

[Shirley]

anyone out there that can help please assist. long story, i had alengthy marriage that ended in 95' didnt date very much until i met heather in fall of 98', i fell madly for her. i courted her and we beagn dating and our relationship matured. she began spekaing a great deal about a female in her office that was having an affair w/ the dr. however it seemed to me that she was telling her story. i confronted her about it, which she denied,but when her ex was back in town last sept. his sister had made a remark about her having an affair w/ the dr. since they dont speak much it seemed like a wild accustaion, but heather and zacks(ex) ssiter did speak for a while until his sis caused trouble so for her to amke such a remark. well i guess i have issues witht this and she hasnt mentioned it since. and recently she went out w/ some friends, and danced, i dont have problems with her out w/ friends but dancing w/ other men i find innappropriate as i wouldnt engage in that myself. please shed a light on this.

 

Hi!

 

So are both of these things bothering you? The fact that she may have slept with the doctor and the fact that she danced with other men? You are listening to all of these rumors and getting more confused. Don't listen to them anymore, talk to Heather. A mature relationship is one where you can talk with each other about issues and feelings. And about the dancing thing. Women love to dance. They'll even dance with each other. But there are places where they won't feel comfortable dancing with another woman, so they dance with men. They are just having fun. It doesn't mean that they feel close to them. Her feelings are totally different when she dances with you. She can be close to you and have fun at the same time, and it makes her feel wonderful.