need help... this girl is confusing me, and is making me angry

[Jim82]

I used to hang out with this girl I met through a friend, and I am not sure if she liked me or not. But anyways now I always call her to hang out and she says she is with some friends but we could still hang out, she says she will call me back. And I never get the call. Then I will see her or something walking with friends and she comes over and hugs me and says "why dont you ever call me anymore" at this point I am about to punch a hole in the wall, so then I will call her within the next couple of days and she answers and says the same thing as before. Then I will IM her and no response. My question is what in the hell is wrong with her? It makes me so angry, I am just about to quit on her becuase she is being so immature and childish. What is the problem does she really forget or is she just dumb and does forget? I dont really know what to do, can you help me?

 

P.S. we are both teens

[J2FT1]

Me being nice: You are a very good friend of hers and she seems to like you a lot. Maybe if you stick around you might get further with her.

 

Me being honest: You are nothing to her but an option. She's a flake and doesn't respect you. At most she sees you as a "buddy." Move on man.

[Ronni_W]

My question is what in the hell is wrong with her? It makes me so angry,

Yep...she is taking advantage of your just always being available. Perhaps just that she's too young to have developed proper appreciation for friends, and how to nurture friendships.

 

When you start getting angry AT YOURSELF for allowing yourself to stay in this unsatisfactory situation, then you will be getting somewhere . What is "wrong" is that YOU are not being honest and clear about how you want and expect to be treated (which can be expressed in a kind and loving way...doesn't need "confrontation" as much as just conversation.)

[JohnnyBlaze]

I'd like to give you a nice answer as well, but I agree with J2: my honest opinion is that she probably sees you as nothing more than an ego boost. From the sounds of things, she's had plenty of opportunities to make a move; if she wanted to, she would've by now.

 

... she says she will call me back. And I never get the call. Then I will see her or something walking with friends and she comes over and hugs me and says "why dont you ever call me anymore"

That's when you tell her the simple truth, "because you never call back when I do". Don't be cute and soften it; be blunt. Make it clear that you're not a piano - you're not going to sit around, just waiting to be played. It's going to make her mad, that's for certain. It may cause her to stop talking to you at all, or it may be the catalyst you need to get her to step it up a notch. Personally, I think it'll be the former, but there's always a chance.

[Jim82]

Thank you for all your answers, i appreciate it. I think I am just going to move on since this girl is so immature, there are a lot more people out there. but anyway I just wanted to know what she was doing and you people answered my question. But it sucks that I am going to have to see her every day in class, but what can I do. lol

[lazlow99]

I had exactly the same thing happen to me, except when I decided to move on she contacted me saying we should meet up, then backed out again at the last minute when I agreed. Its easy enough to get over, but it just leaves you wondering what is going through their heads and what they get out of it, which is just confusing more that anything.

[Jim82]

Its easy enough to get over, but it just leaves you wondering what is going through their heads and what they get out of it, which is just confusing more that anything.

 

You hit it dead on my friend, because like you said it's easy to get over, but your thinking why is she doing this.