shadowplay Posted August 23, 2008 Share Posted August 23, 2008 Today, I'm obsessing over what to wear to tonight...to a kid's 3rd birthday party! There will be no one single there, but I like to look my best...I also obsessed over what to get as a present...I'm also in the middle of planning a baby shower for a friend...for everything I get invited to, I go...(long as I can)...my life revolves around friends, family, and nursing school. C is not part of that rotation...no guy is...unless he's wined me and dined me to death...lol It sounds like you're a little obsessive in general. I'm glad to hear you have a lot going on in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LoveLace Posted August 23, 2008 Author Share Posted August 23, 2008 Say what you will, but when you devote at least two threads to the minutiae of your interactions with a guy who hasn't even asked you out yet, it comes off as a little obsessive. You are also very defensive, which makes me think I hit a nerve. I'm not criticizing you for it. I'm the queen of obsession, but I think you'd be happier if you just forgot about him completely and tried not to fixate on particular guys in the future. Good luck. Happier? But I'm not unhappy. He hasn't done anything to make me feel that way. It made me feel good to hear my friends say he liked me. But I'm not unhappy about anything that's happened since. There is no reason to be. So if nothing's broken, what is there to fix? I got a new message from him on MS apparently, haven't had a chance to read yet though... Link to post Share on other sites
Author LoveLace Posted August 23, 2008 Author Share Posted August 23, 2008 SH***T!!! He informed me about a show tonight; he even said he would put my name on a guest list so that I don't have to pay! But I can't go! My friend is doing a big thing for her kid's b day this evening. So I told him that, but now I have to leave, so if he writes back I won't get it until very late tonight. But I'm....astounded...don't know what to say right now!! I still didn't offer up a phone #... Link to post Share on other sites
Jilly Bean Posted August 23, 2008 Share Posted August 23, 2008 SH***T!!! He informed me about a show tonight; he even said he would put my name on a guest list so that I don't have to pay! But I can't go! My friend is doing a big thing for her kid's b day this evening. So I told him that, but now I have to leave, so if he writes back I won't get it until very late tonight. But I'm....astounded...don't know what to say right now!! I still didn't offer up a phone #... Wow, wow, wow! LL - he continues to treat you like a friend, still makes no moves on you romantically, yet you completely freak out from getting an email? Girl - in one post you say you're calm and you don't care what happens with him, and then you react like this? I think you need to be honest with yourself, since you won't be on LS, obviously. And then beyond that, you need to CALM down. Honestly, you're behaving like a 15-year old with a crush on a friends older brother who patted you on the head and called you a cute kid. I just don't get why you are hysterical over receiving an email in which he still hasn't asked you out. Link to post Share on other sites
Kamille Posted August 24, 2008 Share Posted August 24, 2008 SH***T!!! He informed me about a show tonight; he even said he would put my name on a guest list so that I don't have to pay! But I can't go! My friend is doing a big thing for her kid's b day this evening. So I told him that, but now I have to leave, so if he writes back I won't get it until very late tonight. But I'm....astounded...don't know what to say right now!! I still didn't offer up a phone #... Ah that's good and it's actually kind of oddly good you can't go (cause let's face it, that invite was last minute...) At this point I would consider giving the guy my number... I don't know how I would do it though. "Hope you had a great show! Give me a call, (number, LL)." or something. I don't know. That's what I would do - others might not have the same opinion but I feel like the invite is an effort on his part and that giving him your number is "encouragement". Still up to him to ask you out if he's interested though. You, in the meantime, have nothing to worry about . Link to post Share on other sites
Author LoveLace Posted August 24, 2008 Author Share Posted August 24, 2008 Ah that's good and it's actually kind of oddly good you can't go (cause let's face it, that invite was last minute...) At this point I would consider giving the guy my number... I don't know how I would do it though. "Hope you had a great show! Give me a call, (number, LL)." or something. I don't know. That's what I would do - others might not have the same opinion but I feel like the invite is an effort on his part and that giving him your number is "encouragement". Still up to him to ask you out if he's interested though. You, in the meantime, have nothing to worry about . Well, since he works almost every night of the week, ya gotta wonder if inviting someone to a show is asking someone out...I don't know, who knows. It doesn't look like he read my message yet telling him I couldn't go, but it's only the morning after the fact. Besides, I'm sure it was obvious I couldn't go since I wasn't there! lol..surely he will respond to it though, so I'll decide about the phone # then...and JB, I was excited...does a person have to be 15 yrs old to be excited? I don't think so! I was a little bummed that I couldn't take him up on the invite, but I'm also glad about it now, like Kam said it can be a good thing in a way. I had a good time with some other friends last night, anyhow, so I didn't feel like I was necessarily missing out on anything...my friends there said "I told you he likes you!"....how can I not feel excited right now?! Long as I don't act like a giddy school girl in front of him, who cares! Link to post Share on other sites
Kamille Posted August 24, 2008 Share Posted August 24, 2008 Well, since he works almost every night of the week, ya gotta wonder if inviting someone to a show is asking someone out...! Agreed, but how about we let him do much better then a same-day invite to his own show? A show where he will be playing is an invite (thumbs up) but it's not a date. I've dated musicians as have friends of mine and what I've found is that, as a general rule, you have to know your own standards of how you want to be treated and stick to them - or else you'll end up being another groupie. It so happens that since you both have busy schedules (another good thing), he might have to put a bit more effort into asking you out. You're not asking for the moon, in fact you're not asking for anything, you're just the type of girl who needs notice. I had a good time with some other friends last night, anyhow, so I didn't feel like I was necessarily missing out on anything...my friends there said "I told you he likes you!"....how can I not feel excited right now?! Long as I don't act like a giddy school girl in front of him, who cares So there with you LL. I get excited too when a cute guy contacts me. It's fun. For now, it's the desert in my life, so I'll live vicariously through you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LoveLace Posted August 24, 2008 Author Share Posted August 24, 2008 Agreed, but how about we let him do much better then a same-day invite to his own show? A show where he will be playing is an invite (thumbs up) but it's not a date. I've dated musicians as have friends of mine and what I've found is that, as a general rule, you have to know your own standards of how you want to be treated and stick to them - or else you'll end up being another groupie. It so happens that since you both have busy schedules (another good thing), he might have to put a bit more effort into asking you out. You're not asking for the moon, in fact you're not asking for anything, you're just the type of girl who needs notice. So there with you LL. I get excited too when a cute guy contacts me. It's fun. For now, it's the desert in my life, so I'll live vicariously through you. All good points! don't know if you want to live through me though...lol! I definitely wouldn't treat his invite like a date, it would be more like a "come on out and see us" kind of thing, that could possibly lead to a date. Maybe he wants to check it out in a more casual environment again before thinking anything major....not a bad idea! I was with a girl friend today, and a friend of hers, called and invited us to one of the shows going on somewhere in the city! (The same band C is in); But the guy was non specific on his message, so we never found it. I was briefly excited again when we got that call though!...anyhow he hasn't logged onto MS since the last message, obviously...but I'm half glad we didn't make that show, because I don't want to look like another groupie like you said Kam..then again I don't think he sees me that way because he's known me for so long, in a way that had nothing to do with his band. Oh well! Out for now... Link to post Share on other sites
Author LoveLace Posted August 25, 2008 Author Share Posted August 25, 2008 So the latest...C wrote me back today, and said sorry I couldn't make it the other night. Then he responded to a question I asked him (my dad told me to ask him if his music store carried something rare that he wanted)...C said he could order the product and said to let me know if I needed him to do so. I thought it was awfully nice of him to check; anyway then he asked about my weekend, so I responded to that a few min. ago. I feel silly, sitting here and typing out all the details of our communication, but I'm officially wondering where this is headed...I feel nervous inside. If he asked me out on a date, I'd be a nervous wreck about looking perfect. Sounds a bit stressful even! Perhaps Im thinking too much into the future though...so I guess creeping along slowly is totally a good thing...so is being "friends", far as I'm concerned... I feel confident but there's still that small part of me that reminds myself of his semi-"high profile" status...he could have any beautiful woman he wanted! That's where the intimidation comes in...that would take some work to truly overcome...he plays music at bars, clubs, and parties, the gals are surely drooling...territory of knowing a musician, I know...but if your Pamela Anderson, you'd never have to worry about it! lol Link to post Share on other sites
Author LoveLace Posted August 26, 2008 Author Share Posted August 26, 2008 Well C has now invited me to a holiday fest going on at a park on Sunday, where he will also be performing. I told him I will plan on going...so that's where it stands as of now! It still isn't clear as to where his interest is exactly, but that's also not necessary at this point; I'll get friends together to go to the park and it'll be a blast...though I admit, getting a little nervous about the whole thing...this time, I AM trying to keep my excitement to a minimum! Link to post Share on other sites
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