There she goes again...

[d2darow]

Where do I start? I just recently went through a break up. Less than a month ago, and it has been haunting me ever since.

Before her, I had already gone through a bad r'ship, having been cheated upon. After that, for a year plus I did not even think about getting back into a relationship... Till I met her..

 

I decided to give love another chance, and I went for it. I took her out on dates, and eventually we became a couple. I did every possible thing just to see her smile and make her happy. Every anniversary, I'd write her a letter. And sometimes for no reason at all, I'd surprise her with her fav breakfast, I wrote poems for her, I burnt CDs, made her a certificate, bought her fav movies... you name it.

I was never the flirtatious type, and am always committed when with someone. It went to the extent, that my friends thought I had turned gay, for I wouldn't even look at other girls. She was indeed my life, and I put her before anything.

 

However, she was the rather flirtatious type, I soon found out. She would sit on other guy's laps, always had the tendency to say her "hi's" and "byes" with hugs and kisses. And one time, I found a chat history between her and her ex, and she was saying stuff like "i still think bout you" and "I miss you" etc. I wasn't pissed at all, instead I just told her calmly, that I was rather uncomfortable with her ways. She has quite a temper, and after facing her moods, she actually did cut down.

Then came another occasion, on New Years, wher I brought her to a house party. She started making out with this girl, and guys were video recording it... Imagine watching my own girlfriend do that... Being the soft hearted idiot that I am, I just shrugged it off and told myself that she's just having harmless fun. It did bother me, but I dealt with it.

 

Months went by, and every single day I expressed my deepest love for her. I got along with her family very well, and they all treated me like one of their own. Then came another gloomy day, when I found out she had been chatting with this dude who has had a crush on her since long ago. Chatting is no issue, but I found out they were web camming. And he mentioned this exactly, "your boobs look bigger"... and he also said how he can't wait for her to come back into his arms, and that he misses her etc...

I casually asked her if she has been chatting with him, she looked into my eyes, and said no... I told her about what I read, and as usual, she got so pissed, started cussing and yelling, and asked for a breakup. That was our first breakup. The next day, she came back with a plastic bag of all my stuff I had made, bought and given her. She even tore some of the stuff... We talked, she burst out crying and apologized. She said she wants me to tell her right from wrong, and wants me back. No surprise, I willingly gave the relationship another chance.

 

Despite all these, I never ever loved less. Instead, my love for her continued growing with the passing of each day. She continued to forget our anniversaries, and I continued showering her with affection. For our first year anniversary, she had work, and she didn't even write me a letter, a note... nothing. I on the other hand, had been planning for months on what to surprise her with. First, I burnt a CD with songs, all with "Angel" in the title. I hand made a card for her, and wrote her a letter. I bought a bouquet of a dozen flowers. 11 roses, and 1 white daisy (her fav flower, and colour). The 12 flowers represented the 12 months that we had been together. On each stem, I tied a manila card to it, with a picture of what we did that month, a poem and a note for her. On the daisy, was a note saying "Thanks for standing out in my life"... I used to do all these crap for her... with no expectations in return. Just to see her smile... Well, she did of course. And she cried because she was so touched as well..

 

That was that... and our journey continued.

There were certain arguments in between, but which relationship has been smooth sailing all the way, eh? Anyway, I'll cut the story to August. I went for a 6 day trip with my friends to an island. She was rather sad that I was going (well, at least that's what I thought) and I promised her I'd call and msg her all the time.

While I was there, she had some plans up her sleeves. She went for a trip herself, 3 days with a couple of guys and a few girls. No prob I thought, they're just her buddies. But when she came back, she went for a house party with that dude she was web camming with. That disturbed me a little. What made it worst was, that after that, she went clubbing with her ex...

PLUS, before I left, I chose a dress for her, which she promised she's wear on our anniversary when I got back. (it was kinda skanky) She wore it that night with her ex.

 

I was very much hurt by all of these, so I send her a text message. I asked her why does she crave for attention from other guys so much when she's already in a relationship with me. I said it's unfair, cause I don't give two rat's asses bout other girls, yet all she can do is get too close with other guys...

 

She got pissed and accused me of calling her an "attention seeking slut, a bitch..." etc. Then she called it off there and then. On the phone. While I was on another island... I just took it as she was pissed and didn't really mean it. So when i got back, which was on our 1st year and 2nd month anniversary, I went to her house. Along with me was a bottle of her fav drink, Malibu Mango, and some chocolates. Nothing from her, but no surprise there. We talked, and she said "she can't take this anymore, and needs some time off"... I was confused as to just what SHE can't handle anymore. It was really a small issue that I felt we could overcome... But she chose to give up, and sent me packing home...

I bid farewell to her mum, brothers... I never told them what happened, and left.

 

A few days later, her mum called me and said she saw me looking real sad. She asked if I was having problems with her daughter.. I told her she called it off, and she was really upset with my ex. Even the brothers were asking what the hell was she thinking, and her dad didn't speak to her for sometime.

 

I was devastated, really. She means the world to me, and I never once thought of giving up despite what obstacles came into our path...

 

Soon, I got word that she was already seeing another guy... guys. I don't know. She's been partying non-stop, going out, dirty dancing, flirting... word does go around..

 

It was my 21st birthday just 6 days ago, and she did call and sent me a message. I didn't answer cause I was wasted, but I didn't reply to her message neither... She has been messaging me on MSN a few times, but I just couldn't get myself to reply and communicate with her. I was beyond hurt... Then comes the ****ty part, where ever I go, I think of her, what we used to do. Our fav songs... The usual package that comes with a breakup. I have been dreaming of her, thinking of her non-stop...

 

But one thing that I try to use to console myself with is, that she's probably happy now. Maybe this is the life she wants to lead. She was a year younger than me, maybe she just wasn't ready for a serious r'ship? I kept blaming myself for what happened. Was I the reason? Should I keep in touch?

 

My mind's so messed up, that I have resorted to writing it all down here.

Hearing other people's take on this would probably really help.

[nopainnogain]

I gotta go to sleep now but I will chime in tomorrow. Im interested in this. Sounds very similar to something I went/am going through.

[Mending1985]

It sounds to me like she just wasn't ready for a relationship. You sound like you were wonderful to her, but she obviously has a lot of self esteem issues if she feels the need to go out and flirt with other guys and seek validation that she's attractive (which is all it is - I've been there).

 

I did a lot of that up until about a year ago - being with one guy but keeping other guys around because I liked the attention.

 

I know it hurts now, but trust me, you are much better off without her.

 

She needs to grow up.

[WiseOne1]

I've been through a sistuation like this once before. She tells you that she cant take it anymore! What??? This is all her fault! You did nothing and you had every right to be upset and feel disrespected by her, because all she did mostly was disrespect you.

If the shoe was on the other foot, im pretty sure she would have been acting the same way you were. She bassically tried to switch the whole thing around on you, like your the badguy and you were being unreasonable, and thats just not true.

 

She is'nt ready to settle down, that maybe true, but she also went by it the wrong way, you tried your best to make her happy, and went of out of your way and did some very great things for her, it would have been best that she tell you about the way she feels.

 

What she did was constantly hurt the relationship over and over, you have to see that you treated her like gold, and all she could do is give other guys attention.

 

I normally hate the NC saying, but you need to go NC and stay NC, meaning no talking to her what so ever, (your pretty much gonna get this from everyone else also)

Your so much better off without her, and I know your saying thats easier said that done, but i've been thru this sistuation before, and keeping this girl around is only gonna drag you down.

[d2darow]

Mending that's the same thing other people have been telling me, and yes, I do feel it's a phase some girls go through. She's immature, no denying that. But I can't help but feel upset, because all the other guys out there, mostly have only one thing in mind. To get in her pants. I just don't want her to get hurt... Thanks for the reply Mending.

 

WiseOne, I feel so too. I keep tellin myself that I am better off without her. There are times when I'm this close to messaging her, or calling her and tell her I miss her etc. Then I fight the urge as hard as I can, and I have been doing this nearly daily. It is tough. But coming from you, someone who has been in this situation too, I would really take that as a good reason to go NC. Thanks so much for your feedback.

[WiseOne1]

Mending that's the same thing other people have been telling me, and yes, I do feel it's a phase some girls go through. She's immature, no denying that. But I can't help but feel upset, because all the other guys out there, mostly have only one thing in mind. To get in her pants. I just don't want her to get hurt... Thanks for the reply Mending.

 

WiseOne, I feel so too. I keep tellin myself that I am better off without her. There are times when I'm this close to messaging her, or calling her and tell her I miss her etc. Then I fight the urge as hard as I can, and I have been doing this nearly daily. It is tough. But coming from you, someone who has been in this situation too, I would really take that as a good reason to go NC. Thanks so much for your feedback.

 

While doing NC your gonna make a few mistakes, everyone on LS has, its gonna be times that your gonna slip and call, or txt, you wanna keep that to a miniuim if you cant control the urge.

Its gonna be times she gonna question her decision, and just because you go NC, doesnt mean shes gonna, its gonna be times shes gonna contact you just to make sure you're still there.

 

The reason being she might not be ready to settle down, but she knows what she wants when she does, and that just might be you. So from time to time shes gonna contact you to see if she still has you. Thats when you dont wanna show, because if she feels like she can have you whenever she wants you shes gonna take her sweet time.

 

My long ago ex came didnt wanna settle down, and she came back every 4 months and acted like she wanted me back, and once she found out she still had me, she ran off again, she would tell friends (Mutual Friends) "Why should I go Back Now"? "I can have him whenever I want to" thats when I caught onto her game.

You need to let her know that she cant go out and expect you to always be there for her, and wait on her, she might become upset with you if she thinks that your moving on or appearing to move on.

 

And your right theres a great chance that the only reason this new guy is with her is "just to get in her pants" and it really hurts and bothers you when everyone else can see it, but she cant. Hes ruining something special between you too for his own selfish needs, because im pretty sure if he does get what he wants its gonna push you away and your not gonna want her anymore.

 

That happened with my long ex, the guy she was dating only wanted that 1 thing, I mean I knew him personally and he use to talk about it all the time, and word would get back to me. It took her a year to finnaly come back, and when she did she had been around the block, she left pure and came back a porno star LOL, when she came back I had moved on and didnt want her anymore, I told her it would be best that we be friends.

 

Your sistuation is not hopeless though, you just need to stand firm and hold your ground, and go NC, she cant have her cake and eat it too, because once she knows youll be there for her, shes gonna drag this process out.

[d2darow]

Hie again WiseOne. Looks like your nickname really does suit you.

That is true. I also had the hunch that she took me for granted, knowing that no matter what she does, I'll be there waiting for her. I was always forgiving and she saw that as a green light to do whatever she wants despite its affect on me.

 

Now it's clear, why she started messaging me a lot once I decided not to keep in touch. Maybe it finally hit her, that I may not be there, waiting like a loyal puppy for her anymore.

 

Your long ex, sounds like mine. After me, she started smoking up, fooling around, failing her subjects and yes as you put it, "she left pure and came back a pornstar" hahaha.

 

The odd thing is, after nearly 4 years now since my long ex and I broke up, she called me, and we met up. It was my first time speaking to her since the breakup. I went into NC mode last time as well. She couldn't take it, she kept crawling back to me, asking for me to take her back etc. I stood firm, and said no.

Anyway, back to recently, we talked over dinner, and she told me she realizes now how stupid and immature she was back then. She thanked me for telling her off, but apologized and regrets never listening to me. See? It eventually does kick in huh?

 

About my current ex however, I honestly doubt she'll ever come crawling back. She has way too big of an ego for that. Plus, she knows she's hot and feels she can get any guy she wants. Little does she know, all they want is what's between her legs. Only when she wants real love, will she realize she lost it when she left me. By then, it'll be too late.

[serendip]

Hie again WiseOne. Looks like your nickname really does suit you.

That is true. I also had the hunch that she took me for granted, knowing that no matter what she does, I'll be there waiting for her. I was always forgiving and she saw that as a green light to do whatever she wants despite its affect on me.

 

Now it's clear, why she started messaging me a lot once I decided not to keep in touch. Maybe it finally hit her, that I may not be there, waiting like a loyal puppy for her anymore.

 

Your long ex, sounds like mine. After me, she started smoking up, fooling around, failing her subjects and yes as you put it, "she left pure and came back a pornstar" hahaha.

 

The odd thing is, after nearly 4 years now since my long ex and I broke up, she called me, and we met up. It was my first time speaking to her since the breakup. I went into NC mode last time as well. She couldn't take it, she kept crawling back to me, asking for me to take her back etc. I stood firm, and said no.

Anyway, back to recently, we talked over dinner, and she told me she realizes now how stupid and immature she was back then. She thanked me for telling her off, but apologized and regrets never listening to me. See? It eventually does kick in huh?

 

About my current ex however, I honestly doubt she'll ever come crawling back. She has way too big of an ego for that. Plus, she knows she's hot and feels she can get any guy she wants. Little does she know, all they want is what's between her legs. Only when she wants real love, will she realize she lost it when she left me. By then, it'll be too late.

 

 

No matter how hot a girl is...someone is tired of her sh*t. Your ex sounds like douchebag. She is a selfish human being who cheats b/c of self-esteem issues(the constant need for validation from the opposite sex). You don't want that kind of person in your life...she doesn't respect you because you are a doormat to her.

 

I'm sorry if I come off as harsh but I went through the same thing with my ex...the only thing I regret is not walking away sooner.

 

Ignore her and don't look back...she's going to come around crying...but be strong...don't take her back b/c she won't change...until she takes a serious hard look at herself. You taking her back won't allow her to do that.

[CaliGuy]

Please read "No More Mr Nice Guy" - Glover. You will understand how you became a doormat and how to fix it. Most women do not fall in love or become emotionally attracted to men who are overly giving the way you are. It seems you were trying way too hard to win her love when you should have maintained a healthy level of confidence and self- respect.

[Amacada]

Please read "No More Mr Nice Guy" - Glover. You will understand how you became a doormat and how to fix it. Most women do not fall in love or become emotionally attracted to men who are overly giving the way you are. It seems you were trying way too hard to win her love when you should have maintained a healthy level of confidence and self- respect.

 

Spot on.

 

You were showering her with gifts and attention to make her happy. You linked her happiness to your happiness (ie if she is happy, you were happy).

 

That was the start of your downfall. You need to identify what it is YOU require from a relationship to make you (and keep you) satisfied.

 

The more you tried here, the less she had to - until she didn't have to do anything at all...including giving you respect.

 

As much as your ex is being painted as the bad person here, you need to identify what role you played in allowing her to play her role. Because until you do, you might just find this pattern repeating on you.

[d2darow]

serendip, you did not come off as too harsh. It's true what you say.

 

Caliguy and Amacada, as harsh as reality is, I do have to agree that I gave her too much attention.

But it wasn't to win her over, or "trying too hard" to win her love, it is just how I am by nature. I do these things, I show my affection...

Is that wrong? I will look for that book Caliguy, thanks btw.

Should I change, and start not over-doing it? If I were to get in a relationship again I mean. Like you said, this pattern might repeat over and over again.

 

What I learnt from this whole drama is that, I shouldn't have my life completely revolve around my partner. I should keep a distance, still lead MY life, be independent, and occasionally show her affection, but not over do it.

Am I on the right track here?

[Amacada]

What I learnt from this whole drama is that, I shouldn't have my life completely revolve around my partner. I should keep a distance, still lead MY life, be independent, and occasionally show her affection, but not over do it.

Am I on the right track here?

 

You are very much on the right track with that line of thinking. It's not wrong to be affectionate towards your partner - that is what relationships are about.

 

But you were doing it despite the fact that she wasn't treating you with respect - you were 'rewarding' her disrespectful behaviour.

So she had no need to modify her behaviour because you were actually condoning it.

 

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a nice, caring guy with a decent heart - you sound as though that is what you are. But it does become an issue when you aren't being caring towards yourself and instead let others take advantage of your nature...at the expense of your happiness.

 

The book that Cali recommends is a MUST read for you.

[CaliGuy]

Caliguy and Amacada, as harsh as reality is, I do have to agree that I gave her too much attention.

But it wasn't to win her over, or "trying too hard" to win her love, it is just how I am by nature. I do these things, I show my affection...

Is that wrong?

 

There's a section in the book "No More Mr. Nice Guy" that explains "covert contracts". That is to say, you were doing nice things for her in exchange for love and affection back. You may not even know you were doing this. IE: "I'm going to love you and show you I love you by all the things I do for you -- and I want you to love me back for it". You may not believe this was your intention but your subconscious knew that this "covert contract" was being put into place.

 

By lavishing her with gifts and affection you are in effect PRESSURING her to love you back -- and it NEVER works. Nobody wants to feel pressured (ie: caged) into loving someone. They want to be free to love you, not have their arm twisted. What you were doing was what a classic "doormat" nice guy does. This is a behavior the book will help cure you from. You do not have to go overboard to show someone you love them. When you do nice things for someone, it should be relatively sparingly and with NO obligation. I am sure you didn't feel like you were obligating her to love you but your actions as perceived by her were exactly that.

 

One other thing I will add is this girl is very immature and doesn't know what she wants in life. She's not ready for a committed relationship - with you or anyone else. She's broken goods at this point. A confident, secure man would recognize this and walk away. She isn't right for you and I think you realize that. Perhaps you were enamored with her beauty as you often refer to how "hot" she is. Well trust me, looks are not everything. I've been in your exact position before and I learned the hard way that in order for someone to love me the way I want to be loved I have to first LOVE MYSELF and be happy and confident in who I am.

 

If I am, then I won't need to overly lavish her with gifts or attention. All I need to do is be myself.

 

I will look for that book Caliguy, thanks btw.

 

Given all you have mentioned here, I think the book will change your life.

 

Should I change, and start not over-doing it? If I were to get in a relationship again I mean. Like you said, this pattern might repeat over and over again.

 

Before you get into another relationship you need to read that book at least 3 times ALL THE WAY THROUGH and then do the exercises. You need to retrain your mind. I am not saying you need to change who you are. I am saying you need to change your perspective and behaviors. You simply need to learn to be confident in who you are and love who you are. After all, if aren't truly happy with who you are, if you don't love who you are, how can you expect anyone ELSE to love you the RIGHT way???

 

What I learnt from this whole drama is that, I shouldn't have my life completely revolve around my partner. I should keep a distance, still lead MY life, be independent, and occasionally show her affection, but not over do it.

Am I on the right track here?

 

Sort of. A significant other should enhance your life, not BE your life. You need to have interest OUTSIDE of a relationship. Hobbies, activities, working out, hanging with friends, etc. You need to have a FULL, ROBUST life before you have anything to offer someone else.

 

Think of it this way.

 

You have a bucket. This bucket is filled with love. If you give and give out of this bucket to another person, eventually it's going to run dry and you will have nothing left to give. What you need to do is fill that bucket with love for YOURSELF until it overflows. Then and only then are you capable of loving others in a healthy way. Keep filling that bucket with love and once it stops overflowing you need to back off and give yourself some ME time.

 

Do you get what I am saying here?

 

I would also highly suggest that you find a healthy "mentor". A man you respect, who has the qualities you admire and start hanging out with him and learning how he works. What makes him a "healthy, GOOD man" (not a doormat, not a jerk)? Pick his brain a little. It used to be that men learned this from their fathers, but times have changed. Men have been raised by single mothers (not bashing them, I'm just stating a fact) and have had the missing element of fatherhood that changes them from boys to men. In the process, boys have grown up being man-boys and not men. I realize I am generalizing here, but it's true for the most part. I am a good example. I grew up without a father so I had no clue how to be a man. I had to learn the hard way and it's taken me most of my life to do that.

 

You're young and the advice I am giving you here can save you years of heartbreak. Read the book, for the love of all things, READ THAT BOOK. Once you do, you will totally understand what you did wrong and how to correct it.

 

In the meantime, stay away from this girl. Go complete NO CONTACT and put 100% of your focus on YOU. After all, you are the only person on this planet responsible for your wants, needs and happiness. And YOU are the only person you have control over.

[JooLee]

dude, i wish i'd find someone like you. so i'd say dont change. like you said you are someone who shows expression- its jus how u are and thats one of the beauty in you and one day u will find someone who appreciates it.

 

but on the other hand, you should never make someone yr priority n depend on the person. do hav a life without her as well.. not until your married. haha. i went through the same mistake myself.

 

all the best to you

[nopainnogain]

Before her, I had already gone through a bad r'ship, having been cheated upon. After that, for a year plus I did not even think about getting back into a relationship... Till I met her...

 

Let me take a wild guess.After you were cheated on by your first G/F it devastad you. So when you got into your new R you decided to trust her completely and not be jelous.Which is good to a certain extent.You let her cross boundries because you were burned by your first ex.(happened to me too)

example- sitting on laps,talking to ex,flrty yada yada.

But now we know better for the future.

 

I casually asked her if she has been chatting with him, she looked into my eyes, and said no... I told her about what I read, and as usual, she got so pissed, started cussing and yelling, and asked for a breakup. That was our first breakup. The next day, she came back with a plastic bag of all my stuff I had made, bought and given her. She even tore some of the stuff... We talked, she burst out crying and apologized. She said she wants me to tell her right from wrong, and wants me back. No surprise, I willingly gave the relationship another chance..

 

Typical. She played you like tetris. You let her have cake and eat it to.She wants you to tell her right from wrong:rolleyes:

This is where the book ""no more mr. nice guy would have been handy

 

 

Despite all these, I never ever loved less. Instead, my love for her continued growing with the passing of each day. She continued to forget our anniversaries, and I continued showering her with affection. For our first year anniversary, she had work, and she didn't even write me a letter, a note... nothing. I on the other hand, had been planning for months on what to surprise her with..

 

 

My ex became unresponsive too. No gifts ,didnt remember special dates yada yada. But she kept telling me she wanted to be with me forever which kept me on a string.I was a sucker. And kept thinking the more I do the more I will win her affection but ended up pushing her into some other cock:rolleyes: That was her way of dealing with $hit.I found out to late. All the red flags were there but I was too pu$$y whipped.Now I know what to look for. But guess what? This is a good thing. Im learning a lot about myself andbecomming more head strong. Everything happens for a reason is true.

Soon, I got word that she was already seeing another guy... guys. I don't know. She's been partying non-stop, going out, dirty dancing, flirting... word does go around.. .

I dont mean to be malicious but listen to me carefully. I highly suggest you grow a pair.

What I mean is cut her out of your life completely.. Get all reminders of her and store them in a box far away. Strict N?C her. This chick has screws loose,or she is a heartless wannabe playa. Either way she is young and obviously wants other penis.

 

Now take your time,treat yourself good.Heal. Eventually you will need to get new pu$$y. Plenty of fish in the sea. Better than her. She needs a lot of growing up to do. You help her start by cutting her out NOW. You dont wanna walk a mile in my shoes. I got nothing to loose. Just something to prove.

[Mending1985]

I agree - cut her out of your life.

 

To give you some insight - when my ex and I met - I WAS your ex - I did the exact same things, except I actually DID play around once - I kissed someone else.

 

Now he forgave me and took me back, but it took 6 months to realise he could never trust me again, and for me to realise I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. But it was too late.

 

I hurt him a great deal, and it hurts me to say this, but he's better off without me as a partner.

 

And you're better off without her as a partner.

 

Leave her to f*ck around as much as she wants, and take satisfaction knowing that she won't understand what she had until it's FAR too late.

[d2darow]

Yeah Caliguy, that's true. Maybe I was in a way, pressuring her to love me back, but unintentionally. I never saw it from that point of view. However, about the being confident part. I did neglect my family, friends... even myself. But I did come to a point of realization, where I pledged to stop being that way, and start leading MY life. Just like how she was heartlessly leading hers.

Ever since we broke off, things have been looking good for me. I'm a free lance writer, and I was offered to write for FHM. yay.

I been hanging out with my friends who are all very supportive, and my family too whom I felt bad for neglecting. When with her, I was hardly at home. Usually spending the nights at her place, or coming back real late.

Now, I wasn't with her just because she was "hot", I really did love her a lot. And never did I once think that I should shower her with gifts and stuff cause I felt I would never end up with someone who looks like her.

Confidence is something I do possess, just that I never truly loved myself while with her. And you made me realize how crucial it is to overflow the bucket.

 

NopainNoGain, it's like you really know me. That is exactly how I felt. Because of my previous ex, I wanted to refrain from being jealous. There were no boundaries set by me, and I kept telling myself I have to be more "open" and "understanding". I kid you not, that from the day I got with her, not a night passed without me praying for the strength to be patient, understanding... and for the relationship to work out, and us to be happy always. You're right, I was pu55y whipped.

I did that exactly. Everything she gave me (which is quite little, mind you) is in a bag chucked under my bed.

 

Mending, it is for certain. I will cut her off completely from my life. She did text me saying she got smth for my birthday.. I didn't even reply. It's been a week plus now since she kept in touch, and I guess she's too busy being cheap. But I don't care. It's better this way.

[nopainnogain]

 

NopainNoGain, it's like you really know me. That is exactly how I felt. Because of my previous ex, I wanted to refrain from being jealous. There were no boundaries set by me, and I kept telling myself I have to be more "open" and "understanding". I kid you not, that from the day I got with her, not a night passed without me praying for the strength to be patient, understanding... and for the relationship to work out, and us to be happy always. You're right, I was pu55y whipped.

I did that exactly. Everything she gave me (which is quite little, mind you) is in a bag chucked under my bed.

 

.

 

 

Just dont change who you are because of that hoe .You are very talented,concentrate on your career.From now on have boundries and dont ignore deal breakers. Im the same way. Very affectionate. But if a R isnt 50/50 something is up. You have come to a good place. Dont forget that your #1 ! and fu*k that bit*h! There are many other chicks,especially not like her. Take the right steps in the healing process ,Know that removing that cancer from your life is the best move you can make. Stick with it !

[d2darow]

Yeh, she's dead to me. =) Time to live my life

[nopainnogain]

:)Good job!