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Just wondering


samsungxoxo

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What if it's one of your parents that from your childhood through adulthood teaches you/tells you to hit back then guess you can't be blame totally. I guess most of you remember my post. Sorry but that's me, if the person hits firsts, too bad I respond then. This all comes from my father that would tell me ''Beat the hell out of that bastard that lays one hand on you, get anything if possible''. His father would pretty much tell him the same, he was like ''Son it doesn't matter if he's bigger or stranger than you, beat him with anything''.

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whichwayisup
What if it's one of your parents that from your childhood through adulthood teaches you/tells you to hit back then guess you can't be blame totally

 

You are responsible for your own actions. As a child I can understand blaming your parents but now you are an adult and know that it IS wrong to hit back, let alone hit period! You've posted about this before and we've all told you to get some counselling and anger management in.

 

Whatever you've been told/taught as a child has to be UNDONE by therapy. Learned behaviours can be re-learned with healthier reactions, non violent reactions etc..

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  • 2 weeks later...
What if it's one of your parents that from your childhood through adulthood teaches you/tells you to hit back then guess you can't be blame totally.

 

If the person lives soley with their parents without any other influence or outside knowledge at all, then yes I would say that they cannot be blamed for their actions. If there are any other outside influences which show an alternative path, then no, it is a choice. Especially once a person is perhaphs 16 years old? Childhood patterns are childhood patterns and can be broken if a person chooses. I suppose it depends on whether enjoyment is derived from the experience also. If the 'pay off' for the experience is good in each/most situations of 'a good beating' (for example, feeling good in the sense of being justified rather than appauled at the sight of blood. crying, pain, shame, hurt, humiliation. Enjoyment when speaking about the beating. Planning beatings ahead of time), then the person may eventually choose to continue to do so. If the person wishes to challenge whatever 'pay offs' have developed - then a whole new journey will open up.

 

Best of luck.

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