Tigerlily Posted August 12, 2003 Share Posted August 12, 2003 I have been seeing this guy for two months now. We were talking on the phone every day, asking how each other's day was, wishing each other Good night and so on. He was telling me a lot of things that we would do together. He seemed to be enjoying my company, enjoying being with me. He is a man from my own European background, speaks my language. I was so happy to find a man form my own country, was happy to speak my language. First time since I got here 6 years ago. Last Wed I went to an important doctor, and he was really concerned, called me at least 5 times that day. The night before Wed we discussed that I would come visit him on Thu since I had Fri off. Wed. night's call was the last one... I didn't want to be the one to call him and remind that we planned to meet. So, I am still waiting. It's Monday. After calling me every night he just stopped. I just don't understand. But my pride doesn't let me call and find out. I don't know what to think. I know that he is home because his icon pops up in my Instant Messenger window every now and then. So, not that there sometnig happened to him. I think. Now, does that mean he dumped me for another woman, or he is taking a break from me, or he had been using me all along? Please tell me if I should call, or if it IS his way to quit "us"? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted August 12, 2003 Share Posted August 12, 2003 There is simply no way to answer your questions except with speculation. However, if you are certain that he's OK and that he's just ignoring you, I think the best thing to do is write him off. Since the relationship may basically be over because of his extreme rudeness and lack of consideration and respect, it should be no problem whatsoever for you to call him and see if he's OK...just before you tell his butt to take a long walk off a short pier. Unless he has one hell of a great excuse, it is simply not acceptable for him to drop off the earth as he has done. I think what he did was very cruel. Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted August 12, 2003 Share Posted August 12, 2003 Call him once. But stay cool. If you get his voice mail, leave a message asking him to call you back. (But only one call and one message.) If he does not call back, then you know your answer. If you get him when you call, don't go ballistic because you haven't heard from him. Act normal and use your woman's intuition to see how he acts in response. You should be able to gage whether or not he is acting cold and doesn't want to talk to you. If he acts normal, then you act normal...and then come back for further advice. This sounds odd, but for all you know he was in a car accident or something might have happened with his job or family...there could be many reasons why you haven't heard from him, and he was such an ardent suitor and nothing happened to "turn him off" (so to speak). I normally don't advocate calling guys, but I think in this instance one call is perfectly acceptable. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tigerlily Posted August 16, 2003 Author Share Posted August 16, 2003 The guy disappeared on me last Wednesday. Thank you so much for the two replies I got. I did make one call to him. Didn't get him, naturally. He might have been screening. Got his answering machine and left a message without any hysterics, just asking if he was OK and if could give me a call back. It was Monday night. Nothing. I guess it's my answer. I am trying to understand what kind of person he is. How can I learn to see such people before I get involved? What are some signs a girls can see right away to know he is a user? He seemed quite interested in me in the beginning. What are the biggest things that give it away? Link to post Share on other sites
Sarrow Posted August 16, 2003 Share Posted August 16, 2003 Sorry that happened to you, From previous relationships, I can honestly tell you that the best relationships are those derived from friendship. Don't meet new people as "possibles" and make sure they know how you feel. Doods like this guy are a dime a dozen. Time is a really good tool for everything. Always use time, guys like that want action and want it qwickly I don't know many like that ,. that will take the time to learn about a person.. I actualy don't know any guys that want just action but are willing to wait for it. My best advice is don't worry and be wise. Good luck to ya~ Link to post Share on other sites
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