Charisma Posted August 29, 2008 Share Posted August 29, 2008 Hey gang, So I recently went on this date with a guy who was married for two years a couple of years ago and I think I messed up. We had dinner together and things went well because later we went to the bar for drinks for several hours. The date took a nose dive after that because he told me about his previous marriage and having never been married before I was shocked. I asked a lot of questions and he spoke openly about it and he knew that I had a problem accepting it. It really didn’t sit well with me at first since I’m so old fashioned with the idea of marriage. Something tells me that there won’t be a second date because of how I felt. I sent him an e-mail and tried to patch it up just explaining that I had trouble understanding it since I hadn’t gone through it before. He hasn’t returned my call nor e-mail. I was just wondering if anyone had any advice on my next move. Should I just leave all else alone and move on. The idea of his previous marriage is starting to sink in and with time I think that I would accept it. He even told me that we’d do something again together and that he was interested. Link to post Share on other sites
beautifullove Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 I would love to say "Don't worry about it," but experience tells me that when you come across an issue or something in a man that you don't like, it is that very same issue that breaks you up in the end. But that's just me! Depending on how old you are, meeting divorced men might be more common than not. You have to decide what your boundaries are, and whether or not you are prepared to budge. Just be honest with yourself and what you want. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
LakesideDream Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 Hey gang, So I recently went on this date with a guy who was married for two years a couple of years ago and I think I messed up. We had dinner together and things went well because later we went to the bar for drinks for several hours. The date took a nose dive after that because he told me about his previous marriage and having never been married before I was shocked. I asked a lot of questions and he spoke openly about it and he knew that I had a problem accepting it. It really didn’t sit well with me at first since I’m so old fashioned with the idea of marriage. Something tells me that there won’t be a second date because of how I felt. I sent him an e-mail and tried to patch it up just explaining that I had trouble understanding it since I hadn’t gone through it before. He hasn’t returned my call nor e-mail. I was just wondering if anyone had any advice on my next move. Should I just leave all else alone and move on. The idea of his previous marriage is starting to sink in and with time I think that I would accept it. He even told me that we’d do something again together and that he was interested. Charisma, call it a lesson learned. You say your date was "open" about his past life experiance, and that you had a hard time dealing with it. 'Nuff said! The man didn't appreciate being judged. No problem with you having the feelings you had either. That's what dating is about. Finding common ground, and testing attraction. One bit of advise. In this day and age, it's unusual to find anyone over the age of 15 without a past relationship, or failed marriage. LTR's are to easy to get into and out of for things to be any other way. Chances are good that you will continue to meet folks who have been in relationships previously. Unless of course you enter a convent. Link to post Share on other sites
SmartWoman321 Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 Hm...I am guessing you didn't know he was divorced when you agreed to go out with him (obviously)....and I am just owndering why you are so shocked and honestly, what the big deal is. With over half of 1st marriages ending in divorce, it can almost be expected on the dating scene to meet divorced people. Hm......He was probably freaked out that you were so freaked out about his having been married before. When I read your post I was waiting to read something truely shocking that he revealed- and all it was -was that he was divorced? I don't get it, honestly. At least he didn't reveal he was married!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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