I am not sure if my boss is being friendly or is he flirting with me

[natasha123]

I recently have gotten a new boss because my old boss retired. my boss hardly spoke to me for a couple of months but recently he has started talking to me more. Like for example he is going to try and be funny even when he is trying to tell me what to do . And another thing , i was asking him a question a couple of days ago and he stared at my chest and then at me a few times. I got conscious and checked my blouse , i thought maybe something was wrong but it was fine. And then once we were sitting at lunch and talking about something random and he all of a sudden just said " ohh you are just like me" and then i remembered that he has said this before as well..... so is he just being friendly or is he flirting with me.

[Green]

Who knows, why not just call him on it if its bothering you "Are you flirting with me because I'm starting to feel uncomfortable" "No I wasn't flirting with you, geez sorry I made you feel that way" he'll probably say that whether he was or not and then hopefully he stops... sounds like minor stuff anyways

~by the way are you hot or something? how old r u? how old is he? is there any way we can see what u look like

[natasha123]

I am 30ish and he is probably the same. I think i am just ok.... so thats why i felt kind of weird.

[kyleargyle]

He's probably doing a bit of both. If it bothers you, though, yeah, definitely tell him.

[JamesM]

Always assume the best of people until proven wrong.

 

Having been a boss for many years, we are not perfect. Looking at your "chest" when your chest is not showing any cleavage may be simply that. If he was looking at your shoulder while talking to you, would you assume he was flirting? He may have simply been avoiding your eyes, or he may have simply have been glancing at your necklace. One never knows. I can say that MOST bosses are not flirting. Just because he looked at your chest twice and back at your eyes simply indicates nothing.

 

Why did he start now? Because he is becoming comfortable with his new position. He may feel comfortable with you now, and simply be trying to make friends.

 

If he starts wanting "alone time" with you, then begin worrying. But if you begin to assume that he is after you, then your performance and attitude will reflect it.

 

Remain professional, and let him reveal his true attitude. Never cross the line into a non-business relationship. If he flirts and acts like he expects more or else you will lose your position or job, then worry.

 

I am guessing that based on what you have said, you do not need to worry.

[natasha123]

Thanks James .. i think you maybe right.

[MixMinus]

I think James is right on the money. Sounds like your boss is just trying to relate to you. He's fairly new right? I believe his verbiage was meant to make you feel more comfortable and part of the team.

[Trialbyfire]

When in management, you should be above reproach for anything considered even mildly sexual harassment. Staring at female employees chests is inappropriate behaviour, same as a female boss who stares at male employees crotches.

 

If he continues to do this, just tell him that he's making you uncomfortable. Document this. If he continues this behaviour, contact Human Resources.

[Mary3]

May I ask : Is your chest possibly large or could you see a good definition of it ?

 

I feel he looked at your chest because he was curious and he liked what he saw. He looked at it again and then looked at you.

 

He might be a breast man. He might be attracted to you. He might stare at your chest instead of arms / is kinda hard to believe/ because men are mostly fascinated with the mammaries

 

But the biggest thing here : How did it make you feel ? Uncomfortable ? Nervous ? If you like him, did it make you feel excited that he was looking ?

 

Either way. He should not be looking. He saw and now he knows what your chest looks like. If he stares at your chest again , then you will know he simply likes your chest.

 

If you feel offended by any of what he is doing , you can report it.