so horribly about how i feel :(

[justliketv]

so horribly confused about how i feel!

 

hello!

i'm in serious need of some advice please

 

i've been friends with A for a nearly two years now and we're in the same circle of friends...and now i'm starting to wonder if maybe we are more? we have never really just been friends...he's always liked me. we ended up kissing once on a night out but i truely wasn't looking for a relationship at the time and i only saw him as a friend. months went on and then we ended up drunkenly kissing again and the next day i told him i felt it was a mistake. (i had big feelings for someone else, another friend 'B' and didn't know what to do about them)

 

at christmas me and A got very close, i had gone home from the holidays from uni and we started talking on the phone and texting every day and things and had arranged a date when we got back to uni but i told him i felt confused but that we should take a risk and go on a date or we'll never know. i had really liked B for a year but assumed it would never happen with him. he didn't ever seem interested and i had decided to give up on him but for some reason my feelings for B were holding me back from making a go of things with A. my sister had kind of told B that i liked him but i never thought anything would come of it.

 

when i got back to uni me and A started kind of seeing each other and i had not seen B since i'd been back at uni.

 

but then i went out one night without A (he just happened to not be out that night) and bumped into B and some how there was crazy chemistry between us. i broke it off with A and started seeing B for three months. it was horrible telling A and i cried but he seemed okay about everything, but then sent me a message saying he needed some time before he could be friends with me again. I was really starting to fall for B but he told me he 'wasn't ready for a relationship' i carried on seeing him for a few weeks but i felt sick and ill and told him i couldn't do it anymore.when we decided to end things completly (through text) i had a stress nosebleed and i was a mess after that for months and have only just recently started to feel normal. he (B) is seeing someone else now and hasn't spoke to me at all in the 3 month summer holiday off uni and i'm starting to feel over it now. i was in denial for months thinking that we'd get back together but it's really hurt me that he hasn't been in touch and i have moved on. (though i will have to see him back at uni at the end of the month + new girl )

 

this month i went to a music festival and A was there. in some crazy drunken way things happened between us and it did feel right, i felt as though i'd started to like him.we kind of spent the festival as if we were together. when i got home i text him and said 'do you feel alright about what happened?' and he said 'it felt right.but i won't be hurt if you don't feel right. i really am past that now.'

 

when i got home from the festival...i looked at his facebook at photos of him and it just made me cry for some reason, like sobbing. i don't know if i was crying because i realised how i felt or because i felt so bad for how i'd treated him all this time.

 

i don't know if i love him or love him as a friend

ahhhh.

i would like to go on a few dates (all this time we have never been on a proper date!) and see if there's something there. but with all that history i don't know if we can and i couldn't bear to hurt him again:(

 

i know i have treated A so so badly and i feel so terrible about it and i care about him so much i just cannot decide how i feel.sometimes i feel as though there really is something for than friendship and sometimes i don't.

i really do feel ready for a relationship now and i don't know whether to just give it a go with him do you think if i really liked A deep down i would know?but then i keep thinking maybe it's some kind of fate that all this has happened and things are leading to A?

 

when i was with B, i have never fancied some one so much and we had amazing sexual chemistry..but now looking back i liked him so much more than he liked me and i always had this underlying feeling that he didn't want a relationship. i didn't always feel comfortable around him because i was so nervous and we didn't have a lot in common to talk about.

 

with A, i feel soo comfortable around him but i'm not sure how attracted i am to him. we have a hell of a lot in common and lots to talk about, same interests.i know we are compatable and we could be great together.

 

i just want my love life to be simple now, i've felt so confused with all this for the last two years:(

thankyou for reading and sorry it was so long and rambling..i think it has helped to type it out anyway even if no one can give me any advice:)

xxx

[geotaz]

from reading this i can see that "A" is your typical nice guy, who usauly ends up being put in the friend catergory and tends to not hurt girls and "B" the guy that most girls ditch "A" for, but now "B" is out of the question, i think maybe you have relised that "A" was a really nice guy and that you would definalty have a better chance in the long run with this guy than "B" i think you should slowly get things going with guy "A" and if he still wants to be with you then i sure it will all happen soon enough