amythan Posted September 6, 2008 Share Posted September 6, 2008 Hello, I need some advise because i do not know how to fix this situation. This guy and i we are co-workers, we use to hang out a lot with other two coworkers and we have lots of fun together. Ski trips, drinks and weekend trips. He and i we have been flirtfing for a while, usually touchy and holding hands but once we were drunk we kissed and he freaked out saying this is not right. I decided to stop the flirting but be friends. Problem is he is not really an easy person (with anyone). He never phone me to have lunch of coffee, just party. He seems to come with us just because he does not have other friends around. Never talks about him, never asks about you. He is selfish and he always gives this kind of 'i do not care' impression. All of us are having the same feeling. There was a dj sesion last week and he book two entries without saying to anyone. We were planning to have dinner and go to this event and we proposed him. He came and spent the full time checking his phone, no even one single word and looking at us as if we were retarded. After diner it was heavily raining and we decided to do not go to the club. He got mad, left and he is not taking to us anymore ! We did perhaps wrong and i would apologize but really, i got the impression he had his own plans. I would like to invite him for a coffee and talk about all this stuff but i am afraid he thinks i am silly, i am doing that beacuse i am interested (which is not the motivation) and he gets annoyed. But, if friends cannot have thins kind of converstations .. umm under my definition they are not friends. We should go next weekend for a party trip and all this mess it is annoying. What should i do ? Thanks again !! Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted September 6, 2008 Share Posted September 6, 2008 What should i do ? Honestly, I would suggest to find some of your own answers, first. It sounds as if you are hell-bent to create a relationship (platonic or romantic, doesn't matter) with someone who has narcissistic tendencies... What is motivating you to want to get emotionally closer to someone who is so indifferent to you and everyone else around him? As you've described him, he sounds moody and broody and rude. He doesn't seem to understand how 'democracy' works in a group setting -- most of you decided to not go to that club but, instead of graciously going along with group consensus, he got mad because he didn't get his own way. Then, to "punish" the group, he stops talking to you guys??? How old is he...3? HE needs to apologize to the rest of the group, not the other way around. So...what is compelling you to try to become friendly with someone who acts so immaturely and unfriendly towards you and others, and who appears to have minimal social skills? How do you foresee a relationship with him being MUTUALLY rewarding and supportive? Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts