Is interracial dating with asian men not popular?

[ShortFuze]

I think media plays a big rule. How many asians have you seen on the news, playing sports, in tv shows...movies...or commercials? Barely any. Only tv time asians get is probably testing time like the SOL's or the SATS since there is the theroy asians are suppose to be smart in math.

[dudesomewhere]

what an interesting thread this turned out to be don't you think? hehe

 

well, I'm asian...the secrets out!

 

let me start by saying...white, black, haspanic and of course asian women love me. Yeah I'm one confident sob aint I?...but only in this forum, else you'll find me one quiet but sill confident biyatch .

 

It's more and more prevalent these days though the other races being into asian men. But you have to keep in mind our population makeup in the US, 2%. 2%! That's frikkin nothing! lol. Stereotypes are fast disappearing though in regards to asian men. Yeah, it's evident we aren't short and it's getting evident that people are all the same in the pants . I still do think we have the lightest frames but have seen what I call "white looking" asian guys who stand 6'3"+ with giant bone structures...that's just plain scary to me, hehe.

 

You know the funny thing? The few girls I've been with who've known of the stereotypes actually get mad about that. They really do. It's like they realize some stupid made up crap just to keep the ladies away from the fine china... Yeah, I'm one goofy dude huh? Fact is there are small and big yoinkers in any race.

 

physically I'm one of those intimidating types but only cuz of genetics. Big muscles . Larger than the average including whites and blacks. The one thing that seems common is the larger asian guys are who you'll see with caucasian and black women. It's rare because we are...not big asians, asians in general

 

Remember, it's all individual. Like I am a "white" asian, I'm pale but can get tan. I prefer to be pale and I gravitate to the pale whites and asians. Me no like tan. we are only 2%. You have to play your cards accordingly...don't look to date those who want a porker if you're skinny. I myself see plenty of asian men with non asian women...I'm sure it isn't just me .

 

What Arabess said though is to me very important. "I just thought of them as another guy." It's better to be looked at as a person than a fad. . But take advantage of fads if you want to get nookie. Ride the Mortal Kombat wave and slap on some muscle...grow your hair out a bit and get all the black and white girls you can handle

[ziggue]

I think it also depends on where you live as well. I am half asian. Dad is Australian and Mum is Philipine/Asian.

 

When I was single I had never dated any Asian Men. Wouldn't of minded to either. I guess I don't see any Asian Men around my age where I live I guess a lot. I live in a Beach Town sort of area. My Mum doesn't mind what kind of race I date or have a relationship with. .

 

I bet it's because she married an Australian as well. Interracial Relationships wouldn't even enter her mind. Or my Dads.

[shamen]

It's all the same to me... I've dated Asians, African Americans, whites, Native Americans, mixed up ethnically guys, whatever. Doesn't matter. If a man is attractive, he's attractive. The most beautiful men I have ever met were mixed...

[tiger_nip]

Hey all, I just joined these forums.

I'm a 27yo Japanese male thats been born and raised in NYC. Now, I don't really know how things are outside this area, but around here girls are open to date any race as long as you arn't a prick. I've dated primarily white girls. I'm also lucky because my parents are very liberal minded when it comes to interacial dating. Having said that I don't think that this was always the case. When I was younger, I think the image of asian men were much different. We weren't really seen as sex symbols or even sexy for that matter. I guess this whole "metrosexual" thing might have helped it along. I for one don't like looking like a girl to get girls, but I'm sure it works. So to the dude that originally posted this thread I'd have to say "keep trying, there are white girls out there who like asian men"

 

Having said all this, I'm a recently single guy, so if any ladies want to drop me a line, I'd be happy to answer. A pic will get one from me.

 

peace

[stacy]

I'm an east Indian girl. I would date white guys and I have. But I can't say if I'll ever marry one.

[beau_boy]

First of all hello to everybody. As I was reading through all of ya posting I realized this topic has gone for days maybe weeks. Anyways I'd like to share with you some of my own experiences and/or knowledge.

First of, I was born in Panama city, Panama which is located in Central America. Still dont know where it is at? well have you heard of the Panama Canal? I hope so because in order to past your history test you musta known that. Anyways both of my parents are chinesse. I grew up in Panama and inherit all of their traditions, culture, customs, so in other words I'm hispanic in many ways. I came to the US 5 years ago, joined the military and now that I'm out of service (not too long ago) I'm more than ready to finish my college degree and make more money than any of ya hehehe.

Ok to the point now ---- I'm very attracted to white girls either american, european, swiss, you name it. I was 15 when I had my first g/f and best of all she was black and a model and even better she was the one who approached me so I guess from that point on she really got the better of me and a new me was reborn. I'm 21 y/o and so far I have dated only 1 asian, 1 brazilian, 1 black, 1 indian, 1 canadian, 1 hispanic and my last g/f who was 1/2 white and 1/2 swedish. I know I haven't had too many g/f based on my age but hey give me a break! I don't believe in any of the stereotyping crap nor any of those ancient myth about asian. I think the problem here is more about culture and religion. For instance, when I talk to my mother and joked to her about marrying a american woman she would get not too happy and she even used to tell me that if I ever do that she will never give me a penny or support me in any sort. Since I'm a man now and very independent by the way thanks to my mental toughness I don't give a dime for what she has to say. Nobody has or would ever have control of my life and take decisions over me. This is my life and I do with it what is better for me and I truly believe marrying and mixing my race to another one would be the best for me and for the babies me and my baby mama would create lol.

 

For the asian guys:

 

- Generally speaking, most asian if not all of them are pretty smart or at least above average intellectually speacking. Since you're so witty and white girls like that specially older women you have endless chances. Lots of fishes on the sea, don't bring yourself down because one fishie didn't want attention to you. You're very unique and so is everybody else, I'm pretty sure you will find someone very unique who will love you for life and she's white too.

 

- Asian guys are shy? I believe they are for the most part. Well it depends where you were raised. Since I was raised in Latin America and you know how latins are: loud music, very communicative, etc etc I don't have a problem with shyness. You only need to get out of your own world and summerge yourself to all kind of experiences. When you go to the bank, talk to the nice and beautiful teller, go to libraries, join clubs and organizations, say hello to people you don't know, etc --- all of these help you gains more and more confidence and in no time you will become a man who is very self-assured of himself and not worried about whether or not he's good enough for her. ---- White women (and I think Western, particularly North American women, especially) appreciate a guy who's self-assured and not worried about whether or not he's good enough for her. I repeat: there have been Asian guys who have been as good (and in many cases) better with the ladies than I and other white guys. Even with confidence, you'll run into white women who aren't interested in Asian men, but the trick is not to let that get to you. If you do, you'll find that a lot of other women - women who would ordinarily give you a chance - will pass you by as well.

 

hey baby I can't see you.... all the talk about asian guys being slender, short is over. Two of my ex g/fs are taller than me. My last g/f was a inch taller than me but of course I was way much heavier than her. And best of all She was 25 (4years younger than me) so I gained much experience that I will carry on for life.

And if you think about it, on bed ya both are of the same height so don't sweat it my friend.

 

For the white North America women:

 

-Gosh you girls party your asses off like maniac! hahaha but it's all good as long as you don't too drunk and other guys try to take advantage of you.

 

-If you like a guy and you know he's shy well let me tell you girl that you're better off approaching the guy than waiting for him.

 

-There are lots of asian guys who are attracted to western gals you just have to look farther. Some people can only see to the point of their noises... you get the picture?

 

 

Conclusion:

 

Dear Family I'm sorry to inform all of ya that I will be marrying a hot white girl in the near future I just havent found her yet but when I do I would take her to many places.

 

Have fun guys and take care of yourself.

 

Ray

[AsianIdol]

Ok first I want to say KUDOS for having a very intelligent forum about Asian Men, one that is also balanced and not one way or the other! BUT I AM ABOUT TO BREAK IT ALL DOWN TO YOU IN REALITY! Ok first NO Asian Men do not have small dicks! The deal is yes it is tiny to small when limp, mine is but when HARD watch out it HUNG no pun intended! Also due to William Hung and really weird Asian Media Images it will become more unpopular to date Asian Men. This is sad. I find that it is fun to date outside of one's race, I know that for many Asians for one thing it does not feel like you are dating your sister anymore! Also Variety is the spice of life, on the down side most likely it won't last long as society and parents will end any inter racial love and sadly I also think inter racial couples especially rare Asian + Other = Usually do not last for many reasons, seeing this Asian Parents want to prevent the heartache and break ups that are inevtiable! The sad fact is VERY FEW interacial couples last especially Asian with other, also the older you get the more Indetity Crisis you will eventually have to deal with along with finding that Asian+Asian couples last longer this is true no matter how much you insist or deny it! Just think your parents are older than you have been through more, they know about the Indentity Crisis and other factors that you do not care about or have experienced...yet! They have and are trying to prevent your eventual heart ache, I broke up with my blonde fiance of 4 years and I don't think I will ever heal from it I was so in love with her and she was may fantasy but she had some very serious issues, came from a broken family and home and was abused as a child which brings me to the next area and that is unfortunately ALL the cute and hot blondes that are attracted to me and go after me I find out they are totally insane or nuts! They all had serious family problems or were abused as kids and so maybe for that reason are crossing over the taboo of dating or falling in love with an Asian Man! I know I will get a lot of heat from that or a lot of nods too! It is still very TABOO and rare for an Asian Man to date or go out with a hot blonde! And from my personal experience(yours might be different) so far all the blondes that confessed their "Asian Persuasion(they came up with this term!) to me turned out to be totally nuts, yes totally hot and cute but totally insane and issued out and none of my relationships lasted with them, one lasted 3 weeks another lasted 4 years and I almost got married in Tahiti but thank goodness I did not!

 

And yet the Asian Girls I would want to date or are attracted to date WHITE GUYS! I hate to say it Asian Men but we are kinda screwed in many ways! The older I get the more I realize this! Check it, we all have a serious Identity Crisis Wall just waiting for us, sooner or later we will find that we are not accepted by wither whites or asians and will have to figure out which one to "try " to fit into, my first 1/2 of life was being white and assimilating naturally, now at 32 I find too much racism, media stereotypes and have been betrayed literally by too many white and jewish employers that cheated me out of my checks and money and scammed and used me! I am not trying to feed racism but this is what happened to me! So now I am thinking about marrying Asian and working for Asians to see if at least I do not get lied or scammed, hopefully won't! Also sadly since I did hang out with whites and became so American I also unfortunately partied and became a stoner which many whites do and are into and I became a self hating Asian Slacker! Not the best thing to be at 32 and broke up with a blonde finace and all broken hearted and lonely! NOW I SEE why my parents are so strict and traditional they tried to keep me from becoming this now confused Asian Identity Crisis Stoner Slacker that I became! I know there are those of you out there like me! Do NOT BECOME ME it is not fun to be 32, unemployed, stoner, slacker single heart broken and it can all happen while you are dating outside your race and "having fun" that is why the Score Movie character is dangerous although he is NOT a stereotypical Asian Character and people appreciate that he is also not a good role model and can lead Asians like me into the wrong path, I feel like I messed up, I can only hope and pray that I figure things out and fast! Yes I had tons of fun, travel, romance, fantasy love moments and memories and even met Hollywood Celebrities and became friends with them, but now I am broke, unemployed, broken hearted, single, old and not liking life too much now! Maybe it was me, my karma, or is this the path of all Americanized Asians? I am the only slacker even though I went to college and graduated I did not go to the best one and found that after college white people do not exactly welcome me with open arms to hire me and opportunities are extremely lacking or blocked from Asians! But all my other Asian relatives who are not Americanized and married other non Americanized Asians of course they all turned out to be professionals, successful, rich! What happened to me? I dated whacked out blondes, surfed, skated, partied, went to parties, football games, became so American, smoked herb, traveld the world, did yoga, but where did it all get me and where am I now? At the bottom! Being a slacker and having fun has its price and this was a Serious Reality CHECK YO! Ok maybe I have bad luck, but right now...ouch!

[tiger_nip]

I did everything you did AsianIdol. I played highschool football (all county), smoked herd (still do), dated white girls (never seriously dated an asian girl), lost a blonde hottie gf of 4 years, and slacked off all throughout college. But I now have a steady job as a video editor. You being a slacker has nothing to do with American society not accepting you. I must agree that there was a time in my life when I was self hating asian guy. But this was a childhood thing (kids can be cruel). To me, being Asian(Japanese) is now a good thing. I can identify with everything American but I can turn around and be Japanese at anytime. To tell you the truth, I think that the number of girls interested in Asian guys are at an all time high....not all of them are gonna be ****ed up in the head.

Much respect AsianIdol for speaking your mind, I feel you on many levels, but I think you know that being 32, jobless and heartbroken has nothing to do with how society views us or how asian you are.

 

Just out of curiosity....where do you live? I'm from the NYC area so the views of people around here are pretty liberal when it comes asian folks.

 

Good luck with everything, I'll smoke a bowl for you! lata

[loves2much]

maybe its the asians that dont want to do that dating of other races?

I think this might be true. I am a very open white female who has dated out of my race on numerous occasions. I however have never dated an Asian man before but that is only because I have never been approached my an Asian man. I don't pick who I date by the color of their skin, or their religion only by their personality! That is about it: personality! That's what matters most! At least to me!~

[Mr Spock]

Height and bulk for me too. I thought the dude in the last james bond was hot before he got all mangled up.......

[tiger_nip]

Hey loves2much! Wanna wrestle?

 

now you can't say you've never been approached by an asian man!

[blue17]

I really like brown girls (indian, or other closely related countries) born in North America. However, I get the impression that most of them only like to date within their own race. One who I have talked to said they prefer brown guys, and the other one I know seems to hang out with a lot of brown guys herself.....so i can only assume she is similar. Am I true that most brown girls tend to date within their race?

 

For me, I don't really think as asians born in North America as any different in terms of dating. I would date any azn girl just as much as a white girl......I don't really sense any cultural boundaries that would prevent it. For some reason, when it comes to brown girls I feel that there is more of a cultural barrier...maybe because their aren't as many as them are there are azns, i'm not really sure.

[phi3587]

Yeah, it is...it's height and bulk. Asian men are shorter than white women, from what i've seen. I'm about 3 inches taller than the average white woman, and it's because i didn't eat the rice!

 

So my advice: Stop with the rice, and milk does the body good. And working our wouldn't be such a bad idea.

 

And ladies...what gives with the stereotypical saying that all Asian men have small noodles? Not all of us are small...in fact, some of us are more than well hung.

[AsianIdol]

OK MAD PROPS TO Tiger Nip! I can dig your post and humor but must retort my brutha! First I LOVE NEW YORK truly the BEST CITY IN THE WORLD sorry about the towers that was lame! I have been to NYC 5 times, had the best time of my life loved it everyone is cool to Asians big time there, probably because there are "not too many" don't know if you have been to San Francisco, it sucks there to be Asian there first it is too croweded and there are tons of super ancient old scary Asians that are rude so everyone is biased and down on Asians big in SF! In LA it is cool and mellow, in SF I experienced tons of racism and problems socially, economically, etc.! Asians are kept down big time in SF! NYC and LA and Hawaii rocks for Asians! Ok but to retort I feel you and hear what you are saying, I am not saying that I am being so down and out because of being an Asian slacker, stoner although at 32 I have stopped the toking because my life is too much like that commercial where the little bro is going down to the basement and his stoner bro is like a total scary slacker, bongs can do that to you so I would not suggest following that path at all. I hate to say it but parents and Asian parents know what they are doing and are strict for a reason, they are older and more experienced and they tried to keep me from being the stoner slacker I am today! For Asians there is only so many roles to be: super computer video game Honda racing Nerd with spikey hair, super homework accountant 24 hours of homework, the studly preppy or athletic stoner jock, the stoner partyer that is so American or fits in and dates non Asians, the computer programmer in front of the computer 24/7 and that is about it! Call it stereotypes, roles, whatever in college this is what I saw and was around! I was the athletic party goer stoner Americanized slacker and thought I was having so much fun, was so cool , so different and well I was but at a high price! I've had good jobs, none were careers or stable and after 9/11 everything sucks, my whole life has been about travel, having fun, I have been around the World 3 times and got to go to super exotic places like Europe(extreme Asian hate in Barcelona, Paris(I got mugged), Italy those 3 places HATE Asians and I did not have fun there!), I went to SOutheast Asia, Hawaii, Cancun, Bahamas, most of the 50 United states, Canada, Mexico. So yeah I had my fun! My blonde EX paid for Hawaii and Cancun best time of my life and I love her for treating me to that. But travel also = broke when you come back home!

 

I think I am unemployed, broke, alone now not so much because I am also a slacker Asian(although that can't help!), but probably because I am going through my bad luck period and down time, life can't be up all the time! I did my research and if you look up RAHU KETU in Google.com it is the worst year of one's life where you lose everything and everyone and forced to be alone and no one believes you and you go crazy and they suggest you join a buddhist monatary no kidding! I am going through that period now, but it is also manifesting as being a slacker and some racism as no matter how many interviews I go to or try nothing works but that goes back to RAHU KETU where the more you try the worse things get

 

I told you I was going to break down some knowledge! SO all Virgos, Libras and Scorpios are going through the WORST year of their life now since August 2003 they lost everything and everyone and made to suffer, BUT TAKE HEART in September 25th Jupiter goes into Libra and EVERYTHING will reverse and we will ALL get one FULL YEAR of wealth, job, health, parties, happiness again to offset the RAHU KETU SERIOUS! That is why everything gets messed up! If you don't believe me talk to any Scorpio or Virgo they will tell you how tuff it is! Only some Libras though! But for EVERYONE after September 25th it is ALL GOOD FOR ONE FULL YEAR especially for Scorpio and Virgo so just hang in there yall good times are coming again I know right now is super depression, lose and loneliness I am there too!

 

But yeah I will be on top of my game I hope Tiger Nip reads this! Hey what is with the built in racism in your name? Twist of irony too many bowls??? At least AsianIdol has a pun and joke built in!

 

Ok so now for more truth! I am not saying all blondes or girls are whacked but lets face it I have had girls tell me that all girls are crazy becuase once a month they go through their period and get whacked out. She told me that for her it was like looking forward to getting her ass kicked every month, if that happened to me I would go nuts too! Well yeah! But then after their period they go on a hormonal roller coaster then get super horny too! Wow us men are lucky we are like that all the time not just once a month!

 

But also FOR ME in my experience the blondes(lots come up to me) that fall in love with me and come after me they are ALL super cute and hot but super issues and messed up past lives too! After a while I noticed a trend, I never got a normal or rich or preppy blonde! I always got the ones that are nuts, were tomboys at one point, were abused, or from a broken family and part of the rebelion now or almost taboo behavior pattern is to go out with me the Asian Hottie! I talked to other Asians, ok one other since this is still rare, and he had the same problem with his blonde hottie! Don't get me wrong no one is perfect, I had tons of great times and outwardly they are cute and hot but not the same ones that would say go out with another white guy, those are more stable, normal, richer, etc. My best example would be I would get the Kelly Bundy and the white guys get Jessica Simpson! Believe me the Asian guy would NEVER get the Jessica Simpson! First there is NO ASIAN POP star in ANY boy band, never will be just William Hung! Sad but true folks, Tiger Nip tell me otherwise bro!

 

Ok maybe other people had different experiences I had these! All my blonde lovers are hotties and cute but messed up somehow and not fully stable! I love them and treat them like queens spent tons of money on them I spent like over $30,000 in 4 years on my ex fiance and was going to marry her in Tahiti! But had to break up the mental and past trauma and her messed up family life just took its toll! And that is why I am broke, I could have invested that money and be a millionaire by now without her, but no I had to travel, have romance, adventure which was great but breaking up being broken hearted and alone with a Asian Identity crisis big time is not good! BUT it was ALL MEANT TO BE because of RAHU KETU! WITH RAHU KETU it does not matter who you are with or how well you are doing, it gives you EVERYTHING you always wanted or thought you wanted! I had the luxury beach apartment, the convertible, the job, the money, the stocks, the blonde, the travel and adventure I had it all then in August 2003 right when both RAHU KETU and Mercury Retrograde(look that up too it affects EVERYONE 4 times a year!) EVERYTHING got taken away in just a few days, RAHU KETU MAKES SURE YOU GET EVERYTHING YOU THOUGHT WOULD MAKE YOU HAPPY EVERYTHING YOU ALWAYS WANTED THEN ITS JOB IS TO TAKE IT ALL AWAY MAKE YOU SUFFER AND REALIZE ALL THE ILLUSIONS OF THE WORLD read the link! Don't want to go into detail, ok here it is argued and broke up with the ex, totalled the convertible on the freeway with the ex arguing right before it happened in it, got fired from evil boss, lost my apartment as a result and my stocks all went down hard all in a few days! TOTAL true story and how bad RAHU KETU IS! Then 6 months later I moved to SF from LA to try to get a new life and new job and my ex was in SF I tried to get back with her because that is what RAHU does it makes you obsessed! Then after much suffering you get your obsession for like one night then KETU period starts then you get repulsed and want no part of it, forced to move be alone, lonely suffer and broke and I went to Hawaii then now in LA all alone and broken, but at least I found out why DARN THAT RAHU KETU!!!! Everyone has to go through it, many people do not make it through the full year, most do not know about RAHU KETU or why at least I found out! I makes it easier to accept and know what to expect, everyday something really awful or bad happens and if you try to be positive or try to fix it, things get worse and also NO ONE believes you and will try to give you advice, try to convince you RAHU KETU is not real, tries to tell you it is in your head, that is also PART OF THE RAHU KETU CURSE no one believes you and that is if anyone is even around you as you are forced into isolation!

 

As for me I am about to join a Buddhist monatary now! Then in September 25 will go back to the "outside" world just like in Kung Fu! Snatch that grasshopper grasshopper or is it stoner stone??? No more herb for me! My brain is a salad now and I need to chill! I don't want to be the poster child of that commercial, slackers like me learn things the hard way and often when it is too late, that is why we are the screw up slackers! OUR parents try to steer us away from that but we all have our karmas.

 

So I hope we all learned something from my reality post boys and girls! So I am thinking about marrying or dating a banana Asian Girl now! I think for me if I can find one it might last longer and please my parents 2 stoned one bird! Man I gotta stop with the herb gonna stop it really is no good!

 

Tiger Nip you could be Tiger Woods if you put down the bong man!

 

Peace, luv NYC and your posting!

 

Breaking down some reality,

AsianIdol

[phi3587]

Dude, what was not a post! That was an essay.

[tiger_nip]

damn, that was a long post.

 

 

I'm completely suprised about how SF looks at Asian people. I thought that SF would be one of the most accepting cities when it came to Asian folks. It's too bad you had to run into that streak of bad luck. I'm sure you'll bust out of your slump soon.

When it comes to girls, maybe you shouldn't target a specific type or race. I'm sure there are plenty of mentally defective asian girls out there also. I sometimes feel like I'm the ****ed up one because I come from a good family that gets along and supports me no matter what happens.

Being from a broken family must be tough. I had an ex that would yell at me about the smallest bull****. I told her you can just calmly tell me things, but apparently this is how her disfunctional family communicated. By hauling off on each other. So if your gonna target a "type" perhaps you should chose a girl that gets along with their family.

Tiger_nip has a pun in it like a "nip in the butt from a tiger". Anyway, I figured most people don't even know that "nip" is derrogatory term for Japanese people, so I never thought it would be recognized. Ever hear of a cracker called "cheeze nips". I always thought that was racist, but again no one knows thats a racist term, so I never cared all that much.

 

Your right, I'd be the first Japanese American president of the US if I didn't blaze so much.....its the goverments way of keeping me down!!!

Anyway, much love out to SF and AsianIdol. You'll be on top again soon.

 

[AsianIdol]

Hey look I found a Smiley face with Asian Eyes! Just kidding, seriously I try not to take the whole Asian Identity crisis and racism and probs too seriously you do gotta laugh it off or it will get to ya! There is so much to worry and nip I mean nit pick about already! Gotta have that sense of humor and that is why I appreciate you Phi and Tiger bros! Humor is good, some Asians are kinda uptight and conservative take things too seriously, but I notice those guys get ahead and aren't slackers like me!

 

Anyways whatever life is a trip, just wanted to post my trip, and thanks I think things after September 25th will all be good because Jupiter will be in Libra and everyone is supposed to have ONE FULL GOOD YEAR of everything so I am looking forward to bouncing back big time! I am off to the Buddhist monastary for real though, they called and this Friday I am going there, will meet cool people from around the world, they have all natural hot springs, hot baths, Yoga, meditation, everything that a slacker like me enjoys! Also being a spiritual slacker is good, since we are trying to get to the truth and enlightened! Being a slacker in my case allows me to pursue the spiritual path so sometimes a bad can be a good and vica versa! Most people are into the material aspects of life and that is good too but can be very limiting because when would you have time or energy for spiritual pursuits or thinking? Just work work work and we all know what that is like! Anyways we all have our karma, dharma, path to work out and things will look good and bright again soon people! Thanks for your advice and comments, much appreciated!

 

Phi cool photo you give USHER a run for his money and ABS good for you for working out and breaking the mold of the seterotypical skinny Asian! Only think is your photo is kinda squished so you look like a midget in the photo with abs!

 

Tiger, I was just joking man and you gotta sense of humor so that is cool. But like Arnold the Terminator says to be a champion you don't need the weed! He used to puff it helped him to relax and when they asked him what he thought about it, he said that he used to do it but then came to a point where he realized that true champions don't need it or use it, I thought it was a good thoughtful answer and he is the Governor now so kinda doing something right after putting the bong down! Its all in his book and we know how he went on to win all sorts of championships without the herb.

 

Also ok I get the nip thing, besides I am a Trekkie and remember when people on the show were like oh it is only words I am so beyond that whole drama darling. I am kinda there, I do see how it is like a pun sort of. Once in high school when me and my cracker whitey friends cut from lunch(I was only 1 of 4 Asians in the whole school, not that it mattered or I cared), and when we went to the store he bought some Cheez Nips. That is how they spelled it on the box, my Happy Days white boy friends just busted up laughing and I was like what's up? They just laughed harder, I wasn't sure if they were laughing at the imagery of Cheese + Nips like Cheesy Nips or Asians made of Cheese, or were they laughing because it said NIPS or that they spelled Cheez wrong? It probably was all of the above and I punched them all in the arm and they laughed even harder! I just laugh it off because if you take it or things or life too seriously it can be a real downer but if we laugh and do not take things too seriously it can be funny and fun. RAHU KETU is real though and I do not know what signs have to deal with it next year, this year it was HARD, apparently all the signs and people have to go through it, it is the hardest thing I had to go through, and still have to for 2 more months! But then things will get better and I am at a monastary so will have fun, I wish they had some kung fu there!

 

Bry

[phi3587]

There's more dating like this in New York.

[dudesomewhere]

what's with all the buddha heads? EEEHH, I can be racey to my brethren!

 

btw 5'9"(maybe 5'10" )...I wish I was as tall as my older brother at 6'...

 

Now I work 40+ and probably soon to be 60+ and the pay is getting decent and I'm HOT and it's easy to get any female (really, regardless of who you are...I mean look at all the trolls around you, both inside and out, hehe), but I consider myself a slacker because I'm not a doctor or lawyer and make the big ass bucks.

 

And on a serious note...stop trying to date any female as I said up there. Pick quality women you horny yellow bastards

 

On a goofy note...I'm leaving my old retail job in under 2 weeks and I've seen this super fine mother of freakin pearl asian female...but dang it if I don't see her again before I have to leave.

[Bart_Weisser]

This subject is so popular. I can see why. Dating outside of the gene pool has its own appeal.

 

I have done my share of interracial dating, but my current sweetheart is a yellosister. I hope to contribute using my experience and insights thereof. First off, my opinions on a number of issues:

 

1) Media stereotypes. I don't think they play much of a role anymore. People are smart enough to know the difference between fact and fiction. Those who don't, you don't want to date them anyways. As an Chinese man (I dislike using the word "Asian", it's like calling my GF my "partner"), I haven't got non-asian girls asking me whether about Amy Tan. If the media succeeds in portraying a stereotype, it is one that we are different from other races, which I think is also part of the appeal and we should use it to our advantage.

 

2) Size (both aspects). Doesn't matter if you have other attributes to make up for it. If you are an ugly bastard and want to date a hot chick, you'd better have enough cash, or muscle, or whatever. It's that simple. As for dick size, I don't think chicks bring a ruler out and measure it before going ahead with the deed. Yes, size matters, but if a woman lets you play her secret garden, it's probably a pretty small issue. I have an average penis, but I am not concerned about it. The moral of the story is that, one needs to know his limits. Who doesn't want to date J Lo or Cindy. The question is, how hard do you have to work for it.

 

3) Attractiveness and attitude. It's the "eye of the beholder thing" but also backed up by statistics. Personally I generally don't find Chiense women very attractive. (the last hot chinese chick I talked to had a habit of picking her nose in public...) The same can be said for whites, blacks, etc., etc.. I am simply being honest here. Sometimes I find women equally superficial. I don't think there is anything wrong. In fact, this gives me the perfect justification to admire at the female persuasion (only not to gawk).

 

On attitude, I think "confidence" is first and foremost. By "confidence" I mean "perceived confidence". I think Chinese men are confident men. Many of my friends are married. (warning, ladies, I am not being politically correct) While others are hen-packed to the bone, only the two guys I know kept the marriage under control, and they are both Chinese. If this is not a testament of how strong Chinese men are (especially in the rise of feminism) I don't know what will.

 

By control I don't mean abuse. I simply mean that they are the ones to make the calls (and may I add with consideration and responsibility). Being able to do that and still retain respect from the other is not an easy task.

In the western world, the assertiveness of the Chinese men are too subtle to be perceived as being confident. In my opinion, I think this can be achieved by being less conscious about oneself. "Leave the baggages at home" so to speak.

 

4) "Something wrong with the picture" - This refers to the social acceptance of a chinese guy dating outside of the gene pool. This is a tricky issue. I get this more often from my own brethens than not (even my parents prefers that I marry a Chinese girl, but I don't think this is likely to happen). From my personal experience, one of my biggest dating faux pas is to start off a dinner at a Chinese restaurant. Everybody will stare in our direction. I also get the occasional challenges from other men (Chinese or not) if I am out on a date with caucasian women. I have to say, this makes me pretty uncomfortable and I still don't know what to do should such situation arises in the future.

 

5) What she sees you as. Yes, I got turned down a number of times simply because of my heritage. It makes me angry, no doubt, but deep down we all have our own racial preferences. Take my ex, for example, who was French ... when we started dating a while ago, saw me as an Anglo canadian. We broke off because of distance. A few years later, when we dated again, things didn't go so smoothly because she saw me as Chinese. Her cultural expectations of me became different.

 

I think, as a Chinese man, this will be a fact of life if you want to date outside of the gene pool. Most of the times I don't think it is racism. We all want someone with whom we are comfortable, and choosing someone with a common sociological background is probably the easiest way. Crossing the cultural barrier is, I think, a much more complicated matter than msot people expects. It has nothing to do with Chinese being inferior or what not. Simply put, the comfort level is skewed.

 

Just look at most successful interracial relationships. Either one gets assimilated, and there are only a few who meet half way. Most YellowBrothers who end up marrying white chicks are ABCs or CBCs (yes, I said, MOST). Why, because they have been emmersed in the North American culture. Even after living in Canada for half my life, I still don't see myself as fully "Canadian", but rather one who has both cultures and attitudes. I am quite sure most chicks are smart enough to see this in me, and there is nothing to hide.

 

Conclusions:

 

1) The issue with interracial dating has more to do with social and cultural divisions than racial ones.

2) I think Chinese men are confident, and should be more eager to show this to others.

3) If you choose to date other-than-chinese females, you should expect to be turned down more often. This is nobody's facult, and don't feel bad about it. (I know this is hard to do because race is the first thing I'd think of).

4) I think successful interracial relationships are possible. You just have to put more work to it.

 

and most importantly

 

5) Our expectations should be reasonable. There is a difference between our romantic ideals and what we can actually achieve. Sometimes it just means sticking with your own gene pool. (I am sorry, but this is the truth).

 

I know not everybody will agree with what I have to say, but I am looking at it from a practical perspective.

 

BW.

[Anshul]

This is a reply from an Indian living in New zealand to all those ladies who think asians are traditional and stick to their roots. Well to a lot of extent yes. I find the theory part of it quite racist towards people of american, australian british origins, i dont like using the term white either. Indian parents have a tendency to think that if its a white girl around their boy, the marriage or the relationship is bound to break as they believe that western societies have plenty of divorces every 24 hours which can be detrimental to a woman or man in our culture cuz its all got to do with a girls honour and stuff. I for one have always lived outside india and have studied in international and swiss schools so I think differently. I figure if you are serious with a "white" girl and you treat her well with respect and all, the relationship would last long. At present I am myself looking for a NZ country girl to form a serious relationship with. Its just the way I would expect to be treated by kiwi or aussie girls that I am sure they would expect the same degree of respect I would give to an Indian girl as to them.

 

Besides if you start considering that she is white and she is indian and that is a chinese, mate i think u have serious problems in your head

[jnglebuty]

I've never dated an Asian guy, but I'd consider it if he were nice enough. I think that nice people and jerks come in all colors (and genders) so if I were approached by a NICE Asian guy, I'd consider going out with him.

[BurningBright]

Currently I am dating an Asian man. Before I met him, I did believe most of the stereotypes out there (knowing logically that there must be exceptions). They have small penises; their family expect them to date fellow Asian women, etc. Even during high school, I had female friends who were Asian, and they were expected to date within their own race.

 

I am a mixed race (Italian and English, plus a few others I'm sure thrown in for good luck ), and personally I had never considered dating an Asian man, and therefore I have never found myself attracted to them. Well that all soon changed!

 

All looks aside, his personality is what made me fall for him. (Come to think of it.. isn’t that what makes most women fall for men?) In the beginning, I was trying to decide if I was or could be sexually attracted to him, and after I got to know him.. and swoon over his personality and how he treats me... he has become one of the sexiest men I know .

 

I do also now find myself checking out more of the Asian males. I guess it's kind of like when you buy a new car. You notice cars of the same make driving around all over the place!!!

 

~BurningBright

[Anshul]

jnglebuty

 

This is a message for you, actually i sincerely do agree with you. I would have taken matters further had I been in US starting with all the small steps in the track considering I am an understanding asian.