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should i date an excon


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For most people it would probably depend on a lot of factors, including:

 

- how long the person has been back in society

- what crime they committed to serve jail time

- the progress they have made in rehabilitating themselves

 

...etc.

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ok:

 

they were young at the time, maybe 18, spent i think five years for murder. got degree at virginia community college after, steady job as tutor/giving speeches for troubled boys, etc. still drinks, still kind of wild tho. not a good long term bet, but so fun and interesting right now. anyone done this before? anything i need to know?

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Well..depends on a bunch of stuff...but personally, I would NOT! I don't care how fine/sexy/nice/romantic...whatever he was...I wouldn't.

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not a good long term bet, but so fun and interesting right now

Sounds like it's only the fact he's an ex-con that is the big draw for you.

 

And he was in for murder? Sorry, but 4 years out of jail, a community college degree, and some speeches wouldn't be enough for me.

 

I think you're asking for trouble by getting involved with this guy...but I also think that's what you're looking for.

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you might be right - he is smart and stuff too but im not sure what's going with me. i really am looking for advice, not justification. sorry if i came off wrong. i need help and i don't know who to ask.

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A person capable of murder at age 18, who only spends 5 years in lock up, in my opinion, could hardly be rehabilitated. What are the facts of this case? Who exactly was murdered by him? Was he younger than 18 when he was convicted? Who is the "they" you mentioned? Does he associate with the same people he did at the time this crime was committed?

 

Is there no one else to date? How long have you known him? How and where did you two meet? Were you aware he was a convicted murdered or did he tell you this after you met? Do you know anythng about his family or friends? Do any of your friends know him?

 

My advice is NO, I would not and believe you should not date this guy.

 

Blossom

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if i were you, i'd date him, but stick to public places - basically places where he won't be able to kill you.

 

good luck,

-yes

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HokeyReligions

I'm sorry, I tried to write a cohesive response that would not sound like the prospect of dating a known murderer is an automatic NO. But I can't. I can still hear my mother's voice "you don't know him, how can you date him, he might be a murderer!"

 

Even dating him for kicks right now doesn't sound too smart to me. Who knows what you could get tangled up with, and while you are dating him for kicks, you may be missing out on someone who would be better for you.

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Originally posted by yes

basically places where he won't be able to kill you.

 

Hah! That's a pretty good suggestion. ;) Make sure you hide all the sharp objects and weapons of mass destruction too. ;)

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To be honest, I don't think it would be a good idea to date an ex-con that was in the slammer for murder! Do you know the details of his conviction? Like was he drunk and then hit someone with his car? Or in a rage did he blugen his gf to death? I think the details of the murder are important here. If he actively conspired to murder the person, then stay as far away from him as possible. What if you piss him off and he comes after you?

 

However, if he was a drunk driver or any other kind of "accidental" murder then I wouldn't be as wary. You know what, come to think of it, just be satisfied being his friend. Why go down that road when you already know it won't be long term? I would stay away and stay safe.

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