GPFan Posted October 2, 2008 Share Posted October 2, 2008 I'm not letting her actions dictate my responses - sorry - but then I've already said a LOT earlier in this thread that I had come to that conclusion. But of course she's the poor betrayed W and I'm the evil OW - whateverI don't see this being an affair. You didn't go into this acknowledging that he had an active marriage. You seem to wish you had been or could be the OW. I suppose being the OW would provide you with a sense of satisfaction as well as a measure of power. However she isn't a betrayed spouse and you aren't an other woman according to what I understand of your situation. She had a hand in that - Meaning? That she wanted to reconcile with her husband and how it was handled with him ending it with you? I do see that you're still hurting from that break up, that's for sure. If it wasn't a big deal you never would have posted to begin with. I just wonder if there's abit more to the story than we know, and how much he may have led you on while he was trying to work things out with his wife? Was it immediate or was he back and forth for abit, then he decided to end it with you?Agreed. Further details would help us understand how it is that you see her as persecuting you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lookingforward Posted October 2, 2008 Author Share Posted October 2, 2008 I don't see this being an affair. You didn't go into this acknowledging that he had an active marriage. You seem to wish you had been or could be the OW. I suppose being the OW would provide you with a sense of satisfaction as well as a measure of power. However she isn't a betrayed spouse and you aren't an other woman according to what I understand of your situation. Agreed. Further details would help us understand how it is that you see her as persecuting you. ofgs , I never said she's persecuting me LMAO and no, actually I don't see myself as an OW, but try telling that to SOME on here (the 'but he was STILL married brigade') so yeah , let it die - I won't be changing my email and as I've said before with her it's more of a control issue anyway, and I'm not playing Link to post Share on other sites
OWoman Posted October 2, 2008 Share Posted October 2, 2008 I suspect this as well. Like you said OWL, all she'd have to do is say, "I was curious, it won't happen again, I'm sorry". huh? "it won't happen again, I'm sorry"??? Like some naughty child when she did nothing wrong? Saying sorry when you don't mean it, and undertaking not to do something perfectly legitimate just because of someone else's paranoia doesn't strike me as a very adult way of dealing with a situation. If the BW doesn't want anyone to search her profile, she should take it off the site. Putting it up there is consenting to the terms of service, ie that people will search your profile. In fact, it's asking people to do so. LF merely complied with the implicit request. Why on earth should she apologise for doing so???? That's like phoning an author up to apologise for having read a book they published. Weird. Why wouldn't she do that like you said? Because of the OW entitlement attitude that they can mess around with anyone and feels they have no responsibility for their actions. LF was not an OW. Hence, no "OW entitlement" (whatever that is). Seems the BW in her case has a weird sense of entitlement, though... Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted October 2, 2008 Share Posted October 2, 2008 asking why I was 'searching' her on the net and why her H is listed as a 'friend' on my profile - it's all in another thread about the first msgeIt seems like the wife is being civil with you. It would be one thing if she sent you insulting messages, but she simply wants to get information about HER husband, with whom YOU used to sleep, am I correct? Unless she has caused you harm, I think you should feel bad for her. You already had amusement at her expense, to which you were not entitled. I don't want to judge anybody, but let's not pretend that the wife is the bad guy and the OW is the victim. By not responding, you're ASKING for continued communication with this woman. You can call it anything you like...control, whatever...but at the end of the day...YOU are choosing to keep the games going.I agree with everything you're saying. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lookingforward Posted October 2, 2008 Author Share Posted October 2, 2008 It seems like the wife is being civil with you. It would be one thing if she sent you insulting messages, but she simply wants to get information about HER husband, with whom YOU used to sleep, am I correct? Unless she has caused you harm, I think you should feel bad for her. You already had amusement at her expense, to which you were not entitled. I don't want to judge anybody, but let's not pretend that the wife is the bad guy and the OW is the victim. I agree with everything you're saying. Then she should ask HIM, no ? Yes, I slept with him while they were separated (the M was assumed to be over) unlike her who slept with someone else while still living with her H. Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted October 2, 2008 Share Posted October 2, 2008 Then she should ask HIM, no ? Yes, I slept with him while they were separated (the M was assumed to be over) unlike her who slept with someone else while still living with her H. How does THAT affect your situation in any way at all????? Its digs like that that show your anger. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lookingforward Posted October 2, 2008 Author Share Posted October 2, 2008 How does THAT affect your situation in any way at all????? Its digs like that that show your anger. That's not anger, it's just a fact - I'm getting mighty tired of being slammed on here. I asked a question, I've had your advice. Thanks - I'm done now. Link to post Share on other sites
Federica Posted October 2, 2008 Share Posted October 2, 2008 Thread closed by request of OP. Link to post Share on other sites
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