Sad&Lonely08 Posted September 23, 2008 Share Posted September 23, 2008 I wwas thinking about this. How many people are out there who are divorced and still so in love with there ex. Or even just A BF or GF tYPE sITUATION. I mean i know that i will probably more then likey never be with my husband again. And that kills me. But i know i will always love him and have very deep feelings for him. I know i am looped.. Link to post Share on other sites
Crestfallen_KH Posted September 23, 2008 Share Posted September 23, 2008 You're not alone. My divorce happened very quickly (left for another woman, no chance of reconciliation) and I was in love with my ex-husband for several months after the divorce. He was my first love, and a part of me still loves him today. You're not looped, it just takes time. Eventually, that love will change and you'll hopefully be able to look back and smile at the good memories. Just keep going forward in your own life and know you're not alone. Link to post Share on other sites
PWSX3 Posted September 23, 2008 Share Posted September 23, 2008 I am not divorced yet but I can see that I will always have feelings for the xw because we were together for 26 yrs. Now that doesn't mean I won't move on or that I won't find someone else down the road but I feel you will always have part of that person in your heart. My buddy still talks about his x-gf once in a while & that was over 10 years ago. Sure he has moved on dated others, lived with another but you still have those memories. Link to post Share on other sites
zazue Posted September 24, 2008 Share Posted September 24, 2008 You're not looped at all. If you read my post's, and see what a nightmare I lived for 22+ years, you'll see that almost all of us still love our x's or STBX'S, no matter how bad you see the relationship was for you. You have a history, and maybe children with this person. It's hard to shut off your feelings. My life wasn't all bad, but there was much more bad than good. I just survived, and tried to make lemonade out of my lemons. After all this, and all the pain, I still love my STBXH, but that's just conditioning. I need to move on, and reclaim myself. You can do it. You can take steps to re-invent yourself, and have a wonderful future. Soon your loving feelings will be replaced with your new life adventures. Go for it, do it for you. Link to post Share on other sites
dead-dyke Posted September 24, 2008 Share Posted September 24, 2008 Ditto - You're not alone. I try to convince myself I hate her. But that never works for more then 10 mins. Link to post Share on other sites
bayouboi Posted September 24, 2008 Share Posted September 24, 2008 After 8 years together I find the only thing I love is the person I thought she was. I don't love the person I now know her to be at all. There's no going back. Link to post Share on other sites
Karma101 Posted September 24, 2008 Share Posted September 24, 2008 My divorce was final almost a year ago. Separated for over a year before that. I am definitely not in love w/ my XH. As a matter of fact, sometimes I wonder if I was ever actually "in love" w/ him. I am more heartbroken over a recent break up than the end of my marriage. I am most definitely in love with my recent xBF, and probably always will be to some extent. Link to post Share on other sites
moonmosaic Posted September 24, 2008 Share Posted September 24, 2008 I still love my ex for who he was, before the changes started to poison our relationship. I kept looking for us and waiting for us to be the same we were, for many years, searching so desperately to find a way to make us how we used to be and wanting so much for the old days to come back that it was making me frustrated and bitter. Exhausted and numb I left but I still love him, I just made peace with myself that we could never be. I am in love with someone else now and so much happier. Link to post Share on other sites
Issues & tissues Posted September 28, 2008 Share Posted September 28, 2008 I still love my ex for who he was, before the changes started to poison our relationship. I kept looking for us and waiting for us to be the same we were, for many years, searching so desperately to find a way to make us how we used to be and wanting so much for the old days to come back... This is very true of my relationship with my ex. We have been apart almost 9 months now and I miss him terribly. However, it is not the person who cheated on me and lied to me that I miss and love, but on the contrary, it is the person who I fell in love with all those years ago (sadly he has gone forever!). Link to post Share on other sites
You'reasian Posted September 28, 2008 Share Posted September 28, 2008 I wwas thinking about this. How many people are out there who are divorced and still so in love with there ex. Or even just A BF or GF tYPE sITUATION. I mean i know that i will probably more then likey never be with my husband again. And that kills me. But i know i will always love him and have very deep feelings for him. I know i am looped.. Never been married, but I am over my recent ex because we were never meant to be - incompatible - and that's okay. Never could see myself lingering over someone whom wasn't (or didn't want to) with me. Link to post Share on other sites
Siciliana Posted September 28, 2008 Share Posted September 28, 2008 I had a dream a few nights ago about a man who I loved deeply. I would have given my life for him, I would have given life of us, and I would have treated him like a King until the end of time. But, it wasn't meant to be. When I saw him in my dream, I felt so happy. I was so glad to see him again and wanted nothing more than to hug him. I never got to though. He left again. And, when I woke up....my heart weight a metric ton and ached for the rest of the day. I will always love him. I am not sure I will ever love someone the way I did him. Link to post Share on other sites
PWSX3 Posted September 28, 2008 Share Posted September 28, 2008 It is interesting how us as humans can love someone so much even though we can move on & find someone else that makes us happy but we still have those feelings for someone in our past. I just wonder if maybe our first love means more to us since it was our first. Me & my stbxw had been together (26 yrs) almost since high school. I had dated a few other girls but nothing really serious and then I met my stbxw, then I went on a trip after we had been dating for some time & she was all I could think of. Even now knowing that we have grown in different directions in our lives I still care for her & I know once I get threw this pain and grieving of our marriage I'll still think of her. Link to post Share on other sites
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