Art_Critic Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 You live a drama filled existence on LS Ariadne.. Much of that Drama is created by you for you, just as this most recent set of postings were. Why do you think that is ? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted October 16, 2009 Author Share Posted October 16, 2009 You live a drama filled existence on LS Ariadne.. Much of that Drama is created by you for you, just as this most recent set of postings were. Why do you think that is ? Nah, no drama anymore. Now I live a simple life with my son and I hardly leave the house. Link to post Share on other sites
hoping2heal Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 Let's streamline things here. I know more than you do, and it is indeed DG posting. Now proceed to give advice as if this were a fact. Thank you. Okay, Well he doesn't mention her, he hasn't written her or tried to contact her. There's nothing he actually wants from her and is probably pretty annoyed that she tracked him down and chose to announce it to the board. I second that counselling might be very useful for OP that's really the only advice she needs, other than to leave this poor guy alone already. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 Ariadne.. This most recent set of posts are more Drama.. You now have another poster on here participating in that Drama. Why did you post this ?.. it didn't need to be posted. Did you post it for attention ? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted October 16, 2009 Author Share Posted October 16, 2009 Did you post it for attention ? I thought about it for a while... but since this story has been public for so long, I thought I'd update. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted October 16, 2009 Author Share Posted October 16, 2009 Okay, Well he doesn't mention her, he hasn't written her or tried to contact her. There's nothing he actually wants from her and is probably pretty annoyed that she tracked him down and chose to announce it to the board. I second that counselling might be very useful for OP that's really the only advice she needs, other than to leave this poor guy alone already. I know, is all crap. I'm getting over actually.. Link to post Share on other sites
JamesM Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 Why did you post this ?.. it didn't need to be posted. Did you post it for attention ? AC, as someone who posts here frequently and reads many of Ariadne's posts, even I can give a pretty good guess as to why she does.... She loves DG...or perhaps is infatuated with him, and she needs a place to vent her feelings of need for him, her feelings of loneliness, and get some sort of feedback which will help her sort her feelings out. She DOES need to post it as a way to see what her thoughts "look like." While you and I may look at it differently, IMO it is not a bad thing for her to do so. And if we don't see how the thread needs feedback, then I think we can simply read it and say nothing...as I do often. Asking her why she posts will probably not change her feelings. Ariadne, I feel for you. After this length of time and feeling that I do know you as well as someone can online, I can say maybe too easily that DG may never see you as a gf, but I can just as easily be wrong. What I can say with sympathy, empathy, and yes even some friendship type love, please at the very least begin trying to date some men. And even if it is for a friendship type date, this may help you in your loneliness. It will (and I say this as a guy...obviously ) make you more attractive to him. If he sees you as simply hanging on to every thing and word he does, then he doesn't see you as someone who needs to be caught. This diminishes your appeal to him. Okay, just some 2c...right or wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted October 16, 2009 Author Share Posted October 16, 2009 Ariadne, I feel for you. After this length of time and feeling that I do know you as well as someone can online... Thank you so much James. Link to post Share on other sites
SadandConfusedWA Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 AC, as someone who posts here frequently and reads many of Ariadne's posts, even I can give a pretty good guess as to why she does.... She loves DG...or perhaps is infatuated with him, and she needs a place to vent her feelings of need for him, her feelings of loneliness, and get some sort of feedback which will help her sort her feelings out. She DOES need to post it as a way to see what her thoughts "look like." While you and I may look at it differently, IMO it is not a bad thing for her to do so. And if we don't see how the thread needs feedback, then I think we can simply read it and say nothing...as I do often. Asking her why she posts will probably not change her feelings. Ariadne, I feel for you. After this length of time and feeling that I do know you as well as someone can online, I can say maybe too easily that DG may never see you as a gf, but I can just as easily be wrong. What I can say with sympathy, empathy, and yes even some friendship type love, please at the very least begin trying to date some men. And even if it is for a friendship type date, this may help you in your loneliness. It will (and I say this as a guy...obviously ) make you more attractive to him. If he sees you as simply hanging on to every thing and word he does, then he doesn't see you as someone who needs to be caught. This diminishes your appeal to him. Okay, just some 2c...right or wrong. Great post. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 Great post. I don't really think so.. and James, the reason why is that a post like that feeds the problem that Ariadne has with this issue. The post while having some truth isn't helpful in the fact that all it will do is perpetuate the problem she has with getting over him. You do realize that anybody that takes absolutely years to try and get over someone and they don't has some issues that require more than a pat on the back and a " you love him".. that is why response. A pat on the back response to this is IMO something that will do her any good. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 I totally agree.. great post James.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted October 16, 2009 Author Share Posted October 16, 2009 (From my bff this morning: Oh 100% it's him) Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 I don't really think so.. and James, the reason why is that a post like that feeds the problem that Ariadne has with this issue. The post while having some truth isn't helpful in the fact that all it will do is perpetuate the problem she has with getting over him. You do realize that anybody that takes absolutely years to try and get over someone and they don't has some issues that require more than a pat on the back and a " you love him".. that is why response. A pat on the back response to this is IMO something that will do her any good. I know what you're saying Art.. but who are we? professional therapists? I don't think so.. From what I read of Ariadne.. I get the feeling she is getting over this guy... What's wrong with her posting over and over and over about him.. if SHE wants to... we just can simply skip her posts if we think it's overboard... or tired to talk about it. but honestly... I think it could help her to post about him and to discuss her feelings about this guy... just my .02 Link to post Share on other sites
hoping2heal Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 I know what you're saying Art.. but who are we? professional therapists? I don't think so.. From what I read of Ariadne.. I get the feeling she is getting over this guy... What's wrong with her posting over and over and over about him.. if SHE wants to... we just can simply skip her posts if we think it's overboard... or tired to talk about it. but honestly... I think it could help her to post about him and to discuss her feelings about this guy... just my .02 The problem is that it just feeds into her delusion when other people buy in. I think that's a bit of what AC was trying to get at. It is almost 2010, even though this post is 2008..this has been going on since 2006..that's almost 4 years now and OP IMO you posted this hoping someone would grasp at your straws and give you a reason to continue believing this fantasy you have concocted in your head, I think it's doing you a lot of harm mentally and I think people only mean well and don't realise how deep the water runs on this one. It's one thing to post your feelings, but OP I don't think you post your feelings to vent, you post your feelings to create some semblance of a reality that is aided and built with the help of other posters who continue to buy in and feed on this. Link to post Share on other sites
northstar1 Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 I don't really think so.. and James, the reason why is that a post like that feeds the problem that Ariadne has with this issue. The post while having some truth isn't helpful in the fact that all it will do is perpetuate the problem she has with getting over him. You do realize that anybody that takes absolutely years to try and get over someone and they don't has some issues that require more than a pat on the back and a " you love him".. that is why response. A pat on the back response to this is IMO something that will do her any good. I agree here Art. It reminds me of another poster who has been obsessed about their ex from 2 years ago and just can't let it go. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 I know what you're saying Art.. but who are we? professional therapists? I don't think so.. From what I read of Ariadne.. I get the feeling she is getting over this guy... What's wrong with her posting over and over and over about him.. if SHE wants to... we just can simply skip her posts if we think it's overboard... or tired to talk about it. but honestly... I think it could help her to post about him and to discuss her feelings about this guy... just my .02 You do realize that 3.5 years have passed that she has been posting about him on LS and they never had a relationship ? She has driven to his state and stalked him at his house and many other things. She continues to post about him and has no desire to get over him. My 2 cents falls in the needing therapy category and telling her it is okay she loves him " is terribly wrong. Empathy.. sure I feel it for her.. go back and read my other 500 posts to her on her other DG threads.. There comes a time that she needs to put her big girl panties on and get over him and LS is only a webpage and she needs more than a few posters on a keyboard can provide her. Link to post Share on other sites
hoping2heal Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 You do realize that 3.5 years have passed that she has been posting about him on LS and they never had a relationship ? She has driven to his state and stalked him at his house and many other things. She continues to post about him and has no desire to get over him. My 2 cents falls in the needing therapy category and telling her it is okay she loves him " is terribly wrong. Empathy.. sure I feel it for her.. go back and read my other 500 posts to her on her other DG threads.. There comes a time that she needs to put her big girl panties on and get over him and LS is only a webpage and she needs more than a few posters on a keyboard can provide her. DING DING DING, we HAVE a winner! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted October 16, 2009 Author Share Posted October 16, 2009 you posted this hoping someone would grasp at your straws and give you a reason to continue believing this fantasy you have concocted in your head Actually, nobody here ever gives me reason to believe the fantasy. People have been telling me to get over from the start. I guess they were right and there was nothing there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted October 16, 2009 Author Share Posted October 16, 2009 she needs to put her big girl panties on and get over him and LS is only a webpage Cool, now I get to read the posts of DG here. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 You do realize that 3.5 years have passed that she has been posting about him on LS and they never had a relationship ? She has driven to his state and stalked him at his house and many other things. She continues to post about him and has no desire to get over him. My 2 cents falls in the needing therapy category and telling her it is okay she loves him " is terribly wrong. Empathy.. sure I feel it for her.. go back and read my other 500 posts to her on her other DG threads.. There comes a time that she needs to put her big girl panties on and get over him and LS is only a webpage and she needs more than a few posters on a keyboard can provide her. Yabutt.. you can just ignore her now.. if you think it's going in circle. What if she wants to remain in this fantasy world... in her dreams.. what if she never get over him or want to get over him... Who are we to tell her she needs therapy.. and what not.. couldn't we all use some therapy? All I,m saying is this... skip the posts if you don,t like to discuss this with her any longer... Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 Unless he tells you himself "yes, that was me on LS" then there's always going to be abit of doubt if it's really him or not. Your BFF word isn't good enough. Trust me, I thought someone I knew well was on here and I KNEW her style of writing, expressions etc.. Turns out it wasn't her afterall. Bottomline is A, if you truly want to get over DG, you will..You'll let go of the obsession, the fantasy and LIVE your life, find a man who can date you face to face, take you out, spoil you..Not some jerk-off who likes to play games and be a@@hole. He isn't worth your energy, thoughts or tears..Forget him. Link to post Share on other sites
hoping2heal Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 Actually, nobody here ever gives me reason to believe the fantasy. People have been telling me to get over from the start. I guess they were right and there was nothing there. Sure they do, if they didn't you wouldn't be here. You would go find another web community to help affirm and confirm all the delusions you've conjured up about this guy. You have people acting like you dated this guy. You never had a relationship with him. As AC said, you stalked this man and you have people condoning it, it's obvious why you post and what charge you get off of it. You wouldn't bother here if you didn't have people chiming in to "support" you and you know it. Link to post Share on other sites
JamesM Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 The post while having some truth isn't helpful in the fact that all it will do is perpetuate the problem she has with getting over him. A pat on the back response to this is IMO something that will do her any good. My post was one of empathy and sympathy and friendship. I don't think it actually APPROVED of her languishing over DG. Whether it is helpful or not, I don't know. As for getting over him....who knows? Today may be the breakthrough...or tomorrow...or whenever. Point being....everybody has that day when right before the morning is the darkest night. My post was not so much a pat on the back as it was a hug. She continues to post about him and has no desire to get over him. My 2 cents falls in the needing therapy category and telling her it is okay she loves him " is terribly wrong. And that affects you how? And you giving some her some "just get over him" advice will do what? After this long, don't you think she KNOWS she needs to get over him? And yes, counseling is a good idea...we agree on that. I am not sure that I said it is okay that she loves him, but I think I told her that dating other guys can do a couple of things....make her more desirable to him, or lead her to another guy who will be a better match for her. What I do think we forget about is that we all use LS for the same reason that Ariadne does....feedback and friendship. For many of us, we can get over problems in life quickly. For others of us, it takes longer. I for one am not going to say to anyone...."No more posting on this problem of yours. I think you should be over it." Again, just another penny of thought. Link to post Share on other sites
JamesM Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 Yabutt.. you can just ignore her now.. if you think it's going in circle. What if she wants to remain in this fantasy world... in her dreams.. what if she never get over him or want to get over him... Who are we to tell her she needs therapy.. and what not.. couldn't we all use some therapy? All I'm saying is this... skip the posts if you don,t like to discuss this with her any longer... DING DING DING....now we REALLY have a winner! Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 My post was one of empathy and sympathy and friendship. I don't think it actually APPROVED of her languishing over DG. Whether it is helpful or not, I don't know. As for getting over him....who knows? Today may be the breakthrough...or tomorrow...or whenever. Point being....everybody has that day when right before the morning is the darkest night. My post was not so much a pat on the back as it was a hug. And that affects you how? And you giving some her some "just get over him" advice will do what? After this long, don't you think she KNOWS she needs to get over him? And yes, counseling is a good idea...we agree on that. I am not sure that I said it is okay that she loves him, but I think I told her that dating other guys can do a couple of things....make her more desirable to him, or lead her to another guy who will be a better match for her. What I do think we forget about is that we all use LS for the same reason that Ariadne does....feedback and friendship. For many of us, we can get over problems in life quickly. For others of us, it takes longer. I for one am not going to say to anyone...."No more posting on this problem of yours. I think you should be over it." Again, just another penny of thought. Gosh... James... I'm in love... You have a way with words... I totally agree with EVERYTHING you posted here.. well said.. Link to post Share on other sites
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