Bruise on BF's Buttocks

[kerosenegirl]

BF came back from LA where he was working last week. Noticed after sex that he had a bruise on his left cheek. It was circular in shape and was already dark so I knew it had to be a day or two old.

 

I pointed it out to him and he said something like "oh really? weird". Didn't realize he had a bruise.

 

Suspicious me now wonders:

 

If he had bumped into something, he would have remembered even if he didn't know there was a bruise.

 

Also - It's not very big. About the size of a finger tip ( i know i know jumping to conlusions)

 

Should I worry about this?

 

p.s. I know he was working with a girl that I don't fully trust. She's one of those "watch her closely" girls who know about me yet flirts with him nonetheless.

[quankanne]

you're not always aware of hitting yourself in a manner that will later leave bruises. In fact, by the time I notice one on ME, it's a good day or three later, and by then I've totally blanked on how & where it could have occured.

 

the bruise – and whether or not he remembers it – isn't the real problem here, but the fact that you don't trust the flirty girl ... or him. Maybe it's time to get down to the heart of the matter and ask if he's cheated with her, and give your reasons why you think he was up to no good.

[bobdole]

I have a bruise right now on my inner left thigh, kinda high up. I have no idea where it came from but its about 1.5 inches in diameter and dark, decent size. I wouldn't have any concern over this. He probably just bumped his rear into a sharp desk corner in the office or something. I get cuts, nicks, and bruises all the time and have no idea where they come from. Your over-reacting really.

[Lucky_One]

For some reason, my butt will bruise but it never hurts. I hit the dresser in my room the other day, and left a really dark circular bruise; I didn't even hit the dresser hard.

 

I think you are over-reacting if this is all you have that is suspicious.

[Enema]

Why are you with this man if you don't trust him?

[LakesideDream]

I probably bump into something that leaves a bruise once a month. I usually don't notice it unless it's an upper body bruise. I wouldn't notice it at all if it was on my back or butt unless someone told me it was there.

 

Sadly, there usually isn't anyone there to notice! When your BF was away from home, who was there to notice the bruise?

[kerosenegirl]

that's one of those simple questions which cannot be answered without a complicated answer.

 

Sometimes, when we're suspicious, we're not always right. I find myself adjusting to being in a relationship with a very very outgoing and flirty guy. Some of the women in his life don't set off any "alarms" with me. A few (and you know the type) make me think that they aren't on the up and up.

 

I am one of those overly conscious women when it comes to the girlfriends and wives of other men. I make a point to be conversational with them and do my best to make them feel at ease 'cause it's never easy meeting your guy's female friends. I guess I am just suspicious of women who don't have that social chip built in and flirt however they please with someone they know is taken.

 

This girl in LA is like that. And my bf hasn't mentioned much about her other than to say when he got there "oh ***** is working this gig too as it turns out. This was last Saturday. Anyway, he had that hangover voice on Sunday morning when he called on his way to the airport but had supposedly just had dinner and came back to the hotel. I know the hangover voice. He mentioned nothing about ***** but comes back with this bruise on his ass.

 

I know it's not much to go on but I'm super alerted when it comes to her. Anyway his myspace page had a comment from her yesterday that said "why don't you have any pics of us up?" and had posted a picture asking him if he remembered it of some obscure city scenery. Could have been from and older trip. I don't know. Just doesn't sit right with me.

 

However, given his nature, it could be nothing. Although I find it a tad disrespectful that he doesn't discourage flirting like this. Hell for all I know, he could be egging it on.

 

I just don't know how to talk to him about it without getting the whole " you're over-reacting" bit. Things have been really good with us lately and I don't want to make waves. Hell, we even finally put the L word out there this past weekend. I'm not a snoop so I'm not going to go through his cell phone looking for evidence. If something's amiss, I guess I just have to wait it out. If I ask him straight out about *****, even if there is something going on, what's he going to do, admit it? Come on they don't do that. They just turn the tables.

 

Believe it or not, outside of this? I'm mad about this guy. Just don't want to be played..

[norajane]

However, given his nature, it could be nothing. Although I find it a tad disrespectful that he doesn't discourage flirting like this. Hell for all I know, he could be egging it on.

 

I just don't know how to talk to him about it without getting the whole " you're over-reacting" bit. Things have been really good with us lately and I don't want to make waves. Hell, we even finally put the L word out there this past weekend. I'm not a snoop so I'm not going to go through his cell phone looking for evidence. If something's amiss, I guess I just have to wait it out. If I ask him straight out about *****, even if there is something going on, what's he going to do, admit it? Come on they don't do that. They just turn the tables.

 

Believe it or not, outside of this? I'm mad about this guy. Just don't want to be played..

 

What kind of vibe do you get from him about her?

 

How do you talk to him about this? Do you ask him about bruises and myspace and other specific things that cause your spidey-sense to tingle? Do you talk about the issue more broadly, like how their being in LA together made you feel uneasy? What does he think you are over-reacting to?

[RecordProducer]

I think you have a problem with the flirty girl, not the bruise. I can't even imagine how he would have gottent he bruise from her. You think she would press her finger onto his butt cheek really hard and hold it like that for a minute or two? You think she hit his butt while having sex?

 

If you don't trust your partner, that's a big problem. It means one of two things: he is either not trustworthy or you are irrationally jealous. He may have a bruise and not cheat on you or he may cheat on you and never get a bruise. It's not like you found a lip stick trace on his underwear or panties in his car.

[Trimmer]

I'll just add to the chorus: I can seldom remember getting a bruise, even when they're pretty impressive ones. Whenever I hit myself on something, it has almost become reflex to say to myself "Oh, I have to remember this when that bruise comes up," and even with that (probably because it has become such an automatic, and thus empty, exercise) I still can't remember them once I see them in all their full-blown glory...

 

Not to say that this negates your suspicions if they are coming from somewhere else, but I don't think that forgetting the source of a bruise is at all corroborating evidence.

[angie2443]

I wouldn't make anything of the bruise. At the same time, if he's the flirty/outgoing type, he's more likely to put himself into situations where something can happen. I don't think these people make for the best long term relationships. They're fun to mess around with for a short period of time, though. Regardless, you just have to listen to your gut on this one.