tackleboxteddybear Posted August 25, 2003 Share Posted August 25, 2003 Well there was this gal that I thought had a crush on me but she is 17 & i just turned 23. Should possible relationship prospects have an age discrimination? I mean its one thing if she was 14 & that could be seen as wrong. But I look at it this way If I where say 39 she would b 33 or 34.Is that to large of an age gap. Cause I have a few friends one whos 24 & his GF just turned 18 or 19 & I hav couple friends who are 22 & both their GF's are 17. Help me out with some logic here I dont want to be the dirty old man LoL. Link to post Share on other sites
Ryan Posted August 25, 2003 Share Posted August 25, 2003 Well there was this gal that I thought had a crush on me but she is 17 & i just turned 23. She's a senior in high school. You're a senior in college (if not graduated). Two very different places in life....I'd say no way. But I look at it this way If I where say 39 she would b 33 or 34.Is that to large of an age gap. When you're 39 you can date all the 33-year-olds you want. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted August 25, 2003 Share Posted August 25, 2003 When you're talking about age differences, it really depends on the ages and the circumstances. In the case you described, I see no reason why you can't enjoy her company if her parents approve and if the two of you have fun together. But understand a girl of that age can be very fickle and change her mind often about men. There are a number of things to consider regarding age differences as you get older but they are pretty irrelevant in the short term. But if you turn 45 and start dating a lady 25, it'll work OK for a while but when your parts start giving out, she'll be wanting to explore others...say when you're 70 and she's 50. As long as both of you are enjoying the association, take it one day at a time. Link to post Share on other sites
jalexy Posted August 25, 2003 Share Posted August 25, 2003 i would say no! big age difference....big maturity diff. come on dude, get a life Link to post Share on other sites
subtitled Posted August 26, 2003 Share Posted August 26, 2003 as a 17 year old girl who has a crush on a 21 year old... it totally depends on the maturity/interest levels. if she is immature, you will soon get over her. You most probably need to have similar interests and be able to talk about everything with her you would be able to talk about with someone your own age. I think people underestimate the capabilities of a 17 year old though.. or maybe i oversestimate my ability to relate to older people but i consider myself quite mature, and most of my guy friends are older than me. I don't think its a big issue unless you make it one. Link to post Share on other sites
jalexy Posted August 26, 2003 Share Posted August 26, 2003 i think when you are 17, like i once was, you think you know everything already and are ready to capture the world- thinking you are an adult. i am now 21 and i want to slap myself for thinking i knew everything back then....i still have so much to learn, as well as the rest of my college class does too. so no, we do not underestimate the "power" of a 17 year old, we just know the real truth. Link to post Share on other sites
Thor Posted August 26, 2003 Share Posted August 26, 2003 There's not much of an age difference, speaking purely of the numbers here, between 17 and 23. There is, however, usually a large gap between maturity levels and life experience. Most women mature faster than men so an age difference isn't usually a big deal. It's the life experience that will vary for the most part. If you're 23 then you've probably had some college experience already. You're old enough to go to a bar legally. You probably have your drivers license and own your own car (in my state, anyone under 17 can't have a drivers license). More than likely, your 17 year old love interest has not experienced these things which are mostly a part of growing up. In my opinion, I'd suggest that you search for women over the age of 21 for now just because the life experiences will be similar, and you'll more than likely be happier as well. Just a guess. Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted August 26, 2003 Share Posted August 26, 2003 You might want to look up the term "statutory rape" The number of years between you two is not a big deal, it's the place you are in your life. Like the others have pointed out - maturity and life experience mean more than numbers. My husband is a lot more than six years older than me, but I was of "legal age" when we met. Link to post Share on other sites
Thor Posted August 26, 2003 Share Posted August 26, 2003 Hokey brings up a good point. You need to find out what the legal age of consent is in your state. Here in New Mexico, it is 16. My entire point was based on that, but I tend to forget that people come from all parts of the country and abroad. Link to post Share on other sites
Ryan Posted August 27, 2003 Share Posted August 27, 2003 Most women mature faster than men so an age difference isn't usually a big deal. This is one of the biggest psychological fallacies running around today. The discrepancies in mental development are largely in the EARLY teen years. By the late teen years, there is a good deal of equality. The difference comes in what AREAS the maturity arises. A 20 year old woman will be immature in certain ways that a 20 year old man will not, and vice versa. Women do not have the license on interpersonal relationship wisdom....not by a longshot. This notion is perpetuated by older men and younger women to justify their romantic interaction. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted August 27, 2003 Share Posted August 27, 2003 YOU WRITE: "This notion is perpetuated by older men and younger women to justify their romantic interaction." OK, so why then are you letting the cat out of the bag???? Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted August 27, 2003 Share Posted August 27, 2003 It really, really, depends on life circumstance. Some people do mature young; difficult life situations sometimes 'force' growing up on people. I know a young lady of 16 who is wise and level-headed 'way beyond her years. I have seen girls her age act much younger. Same with men - I know one guy who was completely irresponsible until he was 27. Link to post Share on other sites
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