I want to be happy again......

[Broken88]

I've been struggling the past three years. After a very serious relationship that lasted four years ended I started to focus my time on work and work only. Eventually I had a few family related issues that required my complete attention. Because of this it's been very hard to get out and meet new people or socialize. Not to mention the fact that I'm twenty years old and most of the social scenes are for people 21 and up. To put it straight I haven't been on a date in three years.

 

This put me in a bit of a depression. Not only did I have to struggle to maintain my current life but I longed for that meaningful existence and support in a steady relationship. Aside from my busy schedule I'm not sure why I haven't been on a date. I mean I'm 5'9, good looking, funny, charming, compassionate, caring, and a helpless romantic. I can be a little shy but I'm typically very outgoing and fun.

 

I eventually went to a dating website and found someone that I connected with. We've known each other for three months and it seems our ties are growing stronger. We mail each other, communicate via the phone, and try our best to keep in touch. We're even talking about getting together sometime to meet soon. Yet, tonight she told me she seriously doubts anything will come of this. She tells me how amazing I am and how she likes me a lot. Yet, she feels the distance between us won't work.

 

I don't know what to do. Ever since I met her my frustrations and distractions have gone away. I sleep better, food tastes better, and my woes are easier to tackle. I've been more happy knowing her than any other time of my life in the past three years, and then she plants this on me. What should I do?

[Island Girl]

I've been struggling the past three years. After a very serious relationship that lasted four years ended I started to focus my time on work and work only. Eventually I had a few family related issues that required my complete attention. Because of this it's been very hard to get out and meet new people or socialize. Not to mention the fact that I'm twenty years old and most of the social scenes are for people 21 and up. To put it straight I haven't been on a date in three years.

 

This put me in a bit of a depression. Not only did I have to struggle to maintain my current life but I longed for that meaningful existence and support in a steady relationship. Aside from my busy schedule I'm not sure why I haven't been on a date. I mean I'm 5'9, good looking, funny, charming, compassionate, caring, and a helpless romantic. I can be a little shy but I'm typically very outgoing and fun.

 

I understand more than you can know. Just realize that you are 20 and there is way more ahead of you than behind you. You'd be surprised how quickly things can change once they get moving again.

 

I eventually went to a dating website and found someone that I connected with. We've known each other for three months and it seems our ties are growing stronger. We mail each other, communicate via the phone, and try our best to keep in touch. We're even talking about getting together sometime to meet soon. Yet, tonight she told me she seriously doubts anything will come of this. She tells me how amazing I am and how she likes me a lot. Yet, she feels the distance between us won't work.

 

I don't know what to do. Ever since I met her my frustrations and distractions have gone away. I sleep better, food tastes better, and my woes are easier to tackle. I've been more happy knowing her than any other time of my life in the past three years, and then she plants this on me. What should I do?

 

Well you know what is missing. You crave companionship.

 

It sucks that she said that but she is being honest and more careful of your feelings than some can be. She gave you a "head's up" about how she is feeling.

 

This girl showed you what life is really like again. That is wonderful but it does not mean that she is "the one". It doesn't even seem like you think she is right now. So back off the relationship. Take things as they come. Enjoy her friendship and in the meantime reach out to others as well. Get a couple of these friendships going and you won't have time to be in your head so much.

 

My wish for you is that you could relax and enjoy the search for the person that will be your companion. Now is when you refine what you are looking for in that companion and usually there are quite a few that have some but not all of what is really right for YOU.

 

Certainly you are better off now than you were 3 months ago right? That is all because of you deciding to reach out to that big world out there. So don't stop what has been successful.

[Mylife]

If you got over your past and moved onto someone now, I assure you that you can do it again. Just give it time dear, and don't rush into a relationship just because you want to be in one. It is a lot more important that you both agree to be in it, rather that being one sided.

 

Just how she came in your life, more will come, and eventually you will find "The One". Just have hope...and cheer up.