iloveash Posted August 26, 2003 Share Posted August 26, 2003 it all started about five months ago, i first met her during my first day at work (part time), although she look a bit unfriendly on first impression, she do look very cute. i didnt start to really notice her until about two months later when i ask her whether she want to have lunch and together with two other ladies and from then on we always have lunch together. As days past by, four of us became quite close (as friends) and i slowly start to realise her qualities, in other words, i was falling in love with her. i try to let her know my feeling for her but just couldnt find any chances until one day, i told her that i like her, told her that after i know her, my life had became more lively and more interesting, i ask her whether she can give me a chance, she just smile and said, let me think about it... i try to put my feelings into action, there was once she made a simple comment that she feels like drinking milk, i actually ran all the way from my workplace to a supermarket just to buy her milk, i prepare condersed milk for her to drink everyday hoping that it will reduce her gastric problems...and quite a number of things... i think i must had gave her too much pressure, that one day she told me off, she said she is not ready for committment and there is no point waiting for her, i was so heart breaken...but later that same day, she sms to me saying that she dont mean to hurt me and hope to become as close as before, she even sms me some cute pictures, i know she felt a bit sorry for been so straight forward but i didnt blame her, i told her i am feeling ok but actually i am not, i lie to her because i dont want her to feel bad. although she reject me, i still show concern for her. once in a while i will still ask her how is she feeling, how is her gastric and other things. and the best thing about her is that she didnt try to avoid me and last week she injured her leg and of course i did call her and ask how is her leg and need any helps and she did ask me to tag along and drive her to meet her friend and her friend's boyfriend, it was quite fun, we sing, we talk..etc and finally i drove her home, she didnt said anything except thank you. then the following day, she went drinking with her friends, she called me during midnight, she said she is very tired and a bit drunk, ask me whether i can fetch her home, so i went...the next day, she call me again, ask me to accompany her to buy clown fish, so i did... now the problem i am facing is...i am very comfused right now, she did said she is not ready for committments and she didnt avoid me and i dont know what she is thinking right now?she rejected me and yet she still ask me to accompany her to places...yes,i still have feelings for her but what am i to her?am i just a normal friend who happens to have a car, thats why she call me out, or is it other reasons? ladies...please give me some advise here because i really want to know what she is thinking right now and what i should do....thanks Link to post Share on other sites
steffany Posted August 26, 2003 Share Posted August 26, 2003 She likes you as a friend obviously. Just because you are ready to persue something she is not (for reasons of her own) doesn't mean she should be rude, mean, or avoid you. Maybe she has her own issues going on and doesn't think it fair to involve anyone in her life right now. There could be countless reasons we could go over but the fact is she isn't ready to persue the same thing you are. So let her be your friend. Stop looking for clues and signs she is ready for more. If she is ever ready she will let you know. You should except her friendship and look into finding a new woman that is at the same point in her life as you are in yours. Link to post Share on other sites
Author iloveash Posted August 26, 2003 Author Share Posted August 26, 2003 Originally posted by steffany She likes you as a friend obviously. Just because you are ready to persue something she is not (for reasons of her own) doesn't mean she should be rude, mean, or avoid you. Maybe she has her own issues going on and doesn't think it fair to involve anyone in her life right now. There could be countless reasons we could go over but the fact is she isn't ready to persue the same thing you are. So let her be your friend. Stop looking for clues and signs she is ready for more. If she is ever ready she will let you know. You should except her friendship and look into finding a new woman that is at the same point in her life as you are in yours. i get what you mean, for now, she just want to remain as friend. right? i hate to say this but you are right about me not willing to let go and i know i am cheating myself that she will look at me suddenly and say i accept you and although it is very hard to put the word "love" aside, i will still take up your advise and let nature takes its course. Link to post Share on other sites
Author iloveash Posted August 27, 2003 Author Share Posted August 27, 2003 so...any other comments???? Link to post Share on other sites
steffany Posted August 27, 2003 Share Posted August 27, 2003 Is there something specific you are waiting to hear? Link to post Share on other sites
Author iloveash Posted August 27, 2003 Author Share Posted August 27, 2003 i dont know too...i guess i just need more time and give her and myself more breathing space...sigh! thanks for the advise u gave eariler on... Link to post Share on other sites
Author iloveash Posted September 6, 2003 Author Share Posted September 6, 2003 i am going crazy soon......she said she is not ready for committment and yet she is still willing to go out with me...what does it means.....? Link to post Share on other sites
steffany Posted September 8, 2003 Share Posted September 8, 2003 She still likes you as a friend. She never said she didn't like you at all. But rather than lead you on she is trying to be honest with you. I think that is a very good call on her behalf. Enjoy the friendship with this girl. Maybe one day she'll want more maybe not. But in the end you have found a friend and that can't be all bad. Link to post Share on other sites
Author iloveash Posted September 8, 2003 Author Share Posted September 8, 2003 Originally posted by steffany She still likes you as a friend. She never said she didn't like you at all. But rather than lead you on she is trying to be honest with you. I think that is a very good call on her behalf. Enjoy the friendship with this girl. Maybe one day she'll want more maybe not. But in the end you have found a friend and that can't be all bad. Some peoples come and go, some peoples stay in our mind, but some stay in our heart, twenty years down the road, good or worse, she will stay in the bottom of my heart...if i can, i will tell the whole world, "I WILL LOVE HER FOREVER" Link to post Share on other sites
Author iloveash Posted December 1, 2003 Author Share Posted December 1, 2003 few months had past... i have tried to hard to forget her... burried myself in work... keep myself occupied... but no use... i even tried to look for someone else... but realise after that i am only treating them as her substitue... while chatting with her few days ago... i kind of cant control myself... and said eveything out... i told her i still love her... other than her... i wont want others... ask her to give me another chance but she said i am not the problem... she said the problem lie in herself... i am so heart-broken down... felt so useless... everything i did and concern for her seen to go down the drain... i felt so helpless now... i love her so much... cant forget her... i really dont know what to do now... :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(: Link to post Share on other sites
Tonysweetie Posted December 3, 2003 Share Posted December 3, 2003 first of all **HUGS** I know what your going through exactly! Heres what happened. I dated this guy Chris for close to 4 years (the last 2 years was off and on) we loved each other very much and everything we both thought was perfect enough to make it a lifetime. Well around our 3rd year of dating I started falling for his bestfriend real bad. I ended up cheating on Chris by kissing his bestfriend and seeing him behind his back (Huge mistake) Well I started having this hard feelings for his friend so I broke up w/Chris for him. Well his friend felt so bad that I did this that he didn't was to get into a relationship with me for fear of loosing his friendship with Chris and me. I totally understood but I was so heart broken for the longest time. Well after Chris and I broke up Chris constantly was telling me he loved me and wanted us to be friends so we remained friends (he ha no idea and me and his best friend) and things got outta control he tried committing sucide b/c I wouldn't get back together w/him and things got so bad I reported him to a professional. Well finally after things cleared up with him and he left for college me and his bestfriend starting seeing each other and again he said he didn' tthink it was the right time for us...and again I was heart broken this continued about 3 more times and now its been clearly over 3 years since Chris and I have broken up and Chris and him are no longer friends b/c Chris did end up finding out about us plus they just lost touch. Well finally 2 years ago I gave up the waiting and moved on to the love of my life I have now and have been very happy for 2 years! Well Chris's best friend is now finally chasing after me and wanting to be with me but I"m not gonna be dumb and break up w/Tony b/c I know he'll just break my heart again...the point of my story is just to move on eventually you'll see thats its not worth it. I don't doubt your love for her but if she isn't gonna give you what you want you need to move on. If a friendship is to hard for you to handle then you need not to see her so much. I'm not telling you waht to do except following your heart and trust God that it will all work out. Big Hugs for you and I only wish you the best! Take Care and ~God Bless~ Link to post Share on other sites
Author iloveash Posted December 3, 2003 Author Share Posted December 3, 2003 i understand what u r trying to tell me, cause many of my close frens told me the same thing too, i nearly did the wrong thing by going after another girl, cause i realise that i am only treating that girl as her substitue... it is like everything around me have became black and white... life is so unfair... i did so many things for her... and nothing seen to touch her... Link to post Share on other sites
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