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friendzoned...how to tell??


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Posted

Ladies, what are some of the behaviors or key words (ex-you're such a great FRIEND) that guys should look for that tell him that he's been friend-zoned. nothing like the awkwardness with someone you confess to and find out its one-sided!

 

i also put out the same question to the guys! what are some things girls should look out for to help them figure out if a guy is into them or not??

Posted

"I'm not ready for a relationship right now."

 

"I like you a lot, but not in 'that' way."

 

"I love you, but I'm not in love with you."

 

and finally -

 

"Get lost, creep!" is usually a dead give-away.... ;):D

 

But the first three are generally the spot-on ones.

 

Non verbal? Just never taking you up on your offers. Either that, or she gets a friend to break it to you gently, because she doesn't have the nerve.

 

Guys tend to be, as far as I can see, far more obvious. if they don't want to go out with you, they'll try to make it plain, but we gals are not always quick on the uptake, because we have an initially more romanticised ideal of what a man would do/say.

 

I could be waaaaaay wrong of course.

Last time I dated was just into the new millenium....Time before that, 25 years before the end of the last one.....!!

Posted

Better yet don't play games and don't be afraid of rejection and just flat out ask.

Posted

Best way I've been able to tell is when she tells me all about her boyfriend (present or past) and other men she meets in her daily routines. This is known as the "girlfriend with penis" syndrome. She treats me like a girlfriend and is oblivious of my penis :)

Posted

You may also look at the situation from a different viewpoint: Do you really want to end up with a woman who wavers whether you're do-able or not?

Posted
what are some things girls should look out for to help them figure out if a guy is into them or not??

 

When I look at her lips like I'm going to make a new Dyson commercial, that's a sign :)

Posted

Not having sex with her is usually a sure sign :D

Posted
Best way I've been able to tell is when she tells me all about her boyfriend (present or past) and other men she meets in her daily routines. This is known as the "girlfriend with penis" syndrome. She treats me like a girlfriend and is oblivious of my penis :)

Darn that would suck

Posted

One of my friends had a crush on me for ages (this was back about 3 years ago). He'd suggest getting together to go out, I'd put him off and say I was busy (even if I wasn't) and in the end he asked me flat-out and I said 'nah, you know that's not a good idea'. Around a year later, he thanked me ... when the crush wore off he realised we'd have been totally wrong for each other and he'd have never met his girlfriend. :)

Posted
Punning again, eh? ;):D

 

Hey I didn't realize the *proximity* of the words , lol !

Posted

When they talk to you about there problems.

Posted

hmmm when they talk to you about their problems? yall think thats a sure sign? it seems to be the main point in this thread but dont girls like guys who they can talk to about anything?

Posted

When they talk about their problems with their ex ;)

Posted

yea dont you just hate it when that happens. because since its the topic of conversation i have to bring up past instances with my ex which i hate doing. I dont understand why people cant just let go of past partners. and are too blind to see that they have something good in front of them.

Posted

How I treat my 'friend guys' (and not poorly mind you - just devoid of anything that can be taken the wrong way)

 

1. When it comes to talking sex if it comes up, I am not coy or suggestive. Just blunt and to the point, and often crass - just like any guy would be. I don't say anything that would be taken in any way, shape or form as something to be taken the wrong way.

 

2. I mention other guys (or girls) that I find attractive, and often.

 

3. No lingering hugs or physical stuff. The quick 'pat on the back' hug where there is plenty of space from the waist down.

 

4. If there is a booger in their nose or food on their face, I say so without the least bit of embarrassment. If there is a flaw and they ask about it, I'm honest. You may placate a potential lover and pretend not to see flaws, but not so with friends.

 

5. I don't call too often and when they don't call for a while, I don't make a point of it.

 

6. If we go out, I pay my way unless they insist.

 

... and so on.

Posted
When they talk about their problems with their ex ;)

 

When they talk about their problems with their not so ex is who laying in bed next to them asleep while they talk to you about all their problems...

Posted

I don't believe in the friendzone... its a made up phenomenom perpetuated by the misobservation of guys who thought it was a good idea to act like all they ever wanted was friendship with a girl they actualy wanted a romantic relationship with. If you act like a friend and then are to afraid to make a move till after some time of friendship then well you may actually be in a worse possistion to start a relationship then if you started from scratch because its weird when some one acts the oposite of what you were used to. The trick to never being friendzoned is to act like yourself an make your feelings known one way or another to girls you like... then you'll only be rejected!

Posted
I don't believe in the friendzone... its a made up phenomenom perpetuated by the misobservation of guys who thought it was a good idea to act like all they ever wanted was friendship with a girl they actualy wanted a romantic relationship with. If you act like a friend and then are to afraid to make a move till after some time of friendship then well you may actually be in a worse possistion to start a relationship then if you started from scratch because its weird when some one acts the oposite of what you were used to. The trick to never being friendzoned is to act like yourself an make your feelings known one way or another to girls you like... then you'll only be rejected!

 

I love this !

Posted

There's a difference between "acting" like a friend when actually harboring romantic feelings and being put in the friendzone by a woman who has no romantic intent and choosing to remain there. In the latter, one can exhibit romantic behaviors which are rebuffed but one lacks the foresight to see the reality of that decision. I was more a victim (a victim of my own ignorance) of that than the former (acting like a friend when I was attracted). This was a few decades before cell phones, the internet, "friendzones", "NC" and all the LS acronyms we take for granted now. It was back when a man wrote a woman he fancied "love letters" and actually licked a stamp and an envelope and knew his mailman's (never saw a woman) name. Times have changed. Happy for that :)

 

BTW, Mary3, I was serious about the above being true, except I believe the not-yet-ex was passed out drunk, as opposed to sleeping. Then again, who really knows ;)

Posted
There's a difference between "acting" like a friend when actually harboring romantic feelings and being put in the friendzone by a woman who has no romantic intent and choosing to remain there. In the latter, one can exhibit romantic behaviors which are rebuffed but one lacks the foresight to see the reality of that decision. I was more a victim (a victim of my own ignorance) of that than the former (acting like a friend when I was attracted). This was a few decades before cell phones, the internet, "friendzones", "NC" and all the LS acronyms we take for granted now. It was back when a man wrote a woman he fancied "love letters" and actually licked a stamp and an envelope and knew his mailman's (never saw a woman) name. Times have changed. Happy for that :)

 

BTW, Mary3, I was serious about the above being true, except I believe the not-yet-ex was passed out drunk, as opposed to sleeping. Then again, who really knows ;)

 

I really liked your post ! It made me laugh :) Thank God for LS ! But in the meantime for those who don't have any idea.....A man MUST make his intentions known within 2 dates. That means a kiss , arm around the girl , a arm around the waist, maybe lightly touching her hand.

A man must never dangle 3 , 4 , 5 dates because the girl will think he is not interested and she will call him a buddy.

I had a guy do this. I figured its date 3 , this is his chance to make a move and try to kiss me ( usually happens on first date ) but he DIDNT and then he later wondered what happened ?

I told him he was a nice guy. He said Oh holy GOD not the Nice Guy stuff ! I had no clue what he meant by that back then,. Now I do :)

Posted

I remember one date telling me "oh, a hug" when I gave her a hug goodnight after our first nighttime date. I later found out, about a year later, that she married the UPS guy who delivered her route. :)

 

So, in true fashion, as a reformed nice guy friendzone prisoner, I now practice bad boy behavior on married women :D

 

Personally, and I've been there more than a few times, if I was in a "pickle" like C_G is, I'd now back completely away and leave the impression the lady now has as a memory of who I can be to her. I actually have done this, but for very different reasons :)

Posted

Here is my take on things...

 

I think if you have to ask if you've been friend zoned... you have your answer.

Posted
I remember one date telling me "oh, a hug" when I gave her a hug goodnight after our first nighttime date. I later found out, about a year later, that she married the UPS guy who delivered her route. :)

 

So, in true fashion, as a reformed nice guy friendzone prisoner, I now practice bad boy behavior on married women :D

Personally, and I've been there more than a few times, if I was in a "pickle" like C_G is, I'd now back completely away and leave the impression the lady now has as a memory of who I can be to her. I actually have done this, but for very different reasons :)

 

LOL ! I love the friendzone prisoner stuff,....how erotic :)

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