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breaking us mutually and some thoughts on it


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When I first wrote asking advice on what to do after our "mutual" break up I thought I was the only one with these issues. But afer reading some old posts I realize that a lot of people are going through this same thing.

 

And it has prompted me to do some thinking on this issue. When 2 people break up mutually there is probably a very good reason for it. I know that my bf said that I had been pushing him for some time to be the "bad" guy and make the decision to dump me. After some issue or crisis that occurred in our relationship, instead of talking about that issue I would suggest that maybe we just break up. I would often ask if what he wanted to do after making this statement and he would say, "Well, if that's what you want". Neither of us are good communicators! And, if I then said, well I don't want to break up, what if we try "this" and stay together and he would say "Well, if that's what you want".

 

Well, what I WANT is someone who communicates, and listens and WANTS to be in the relationship. Not some wishy washy person who has nothing better to do.

 

So after reading all these same problems in the posts I have to say that I think that whatever happens is more or less meant to be. And we all have regrets over the break up afterwards, even though it is mutual.

 

Go with your gut feelings on this. If you feel an immediate sense of relief after the break up it is probably the right thing to do. Even if it is followed by "how can I get him back"!

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