sharry Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Hi Guys, Just found this website and after reading through can see there are many people in a similar situation to myself ? Have been in a LDR for almost 5 months now and am finding it difficult to cope ? He is a really lovely man and I really don't know what the next step is ? Sharry:love: Link to post Share on other sites
Geishawhelk Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Your question's not making sense... Do you mean you thinking of calling it a day, or do you want help in keeping things stable? What do you mean by 'next step'...? Do you mean breaking up, or what? Link to post Share on other sites
Author sharry Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 Hi, I am confused at the moment. I guess some guidance on how to keep things stable for the moment. Is honesty the best policy to tell him how I feel with the distance between us ? Its just difficult with the communication only being phone calls and texts and not being able to spend time together at weekends, family gatherings etc. Then other times, I think its best to move on but I cannot bring myself to end it. Sharry Link to post Share on other sites
konfuzd Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 How much of a distance? Is there a possibility of the two of you living in the same city in the future? Link to post Share on other sites
Island Girl Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 Hi, I am confused at the moment. I guess some guidance on how to keep things stable for the moment. Is honesty the best policy to tell him how I feel with the distance between us ? Its just difficult with the communication only being phone calls and texts and not being able to spend time together at weekends, family gatherings etc. Then other times, I think its best to move on but I cannot bring myself to end it. Sharry Well you didn't include anything as far as positives go. Just negatives so I think there is your answer. If you are unsure of your own commitment and effort being misplaced then yes, you should talk to him. It takes a great deal of commitment and sacrifice (not to mention a thick skin) to sustain an LDR. It is a lot of effort to keep it going and not succumb to the pushes and pulls of society, friends, and family who would rather see a more traditional relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sharry Posted November 2, 2008 Author Share Posted November 2, 2008 I have been in a LDR now for 5 months. I met the man when I was on holiday and it was the last thing I expected to happen. I had just ended a on/off 5 year relationship a fews months previously and didn't see this coming. I knew him from before and always thought he was a lovely person. When I got home, I didn't expect it to last but we were in contact every day mainly by text message and the odd phone call. I have since visited a couple of times and we spent more time together. Now after 5 mths, I have got to the stage where I want more. Due to work commitments, he will be unable to travel to see me in my country until early in the New Year. I gave a lot of thought to the situation and decided to speak to him about just being in contact via text and how hard I was finding it. We had been talking more on the phone recently and I look forward to talking to him. He said he was finding it difficult too and has been thinking about what we can do. I just want the chance to talk more, spend time together and get to know each other better. He has a child from his previous marriage and I cannot see a situation in the future where he could come and live in the same place as me. There are differences in culture and whilst its only 4 1/2 hours away, I have my life here too and a great family, friends and career. At the same time, I feel we have something together and I don't want to end it without a fight. We talked honestly and openly earlier this week and we are going to take a couple of weeks out without contact just to figure where we are both coming from. Its hard with no contact but maybe it will give us both the time so we can can some clarity about what we both want from our relationship. Has anyone else been in a similar situation ? Link to post Share on other sites
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