Raised by a successful marriage.

[ohhmyandrea]

Reading all of the negativity about marriage in general has me questioning the odds of my own working out.

 

Do you think that a child, the product of a successful young marriage has a better chance at a successful marriage than someone from a one person home?

[quankanne]

I think success in a marriage happens for a number of reasons. Primarily because you've had a good role model to base your own marriage. That can be your mom and dad, a parent-stepparent combo, grandparents, godparents, aunt/uncle/cousin/friend/etc. If you see it lived out, and you chose to emulate it, I think *that's* what'll help get you off to a good start. Because you're choosing to live out that same kind of love and respect you see in that role model marriage.

 

and I think faith background/spirituality can have a lot to do with it; Catholics have a different understanding of marriage because of the sacramentality aspect, even if you don't practice, don't completely agree, etc. That kind of stuff gets burnt into your brain

[oneofakind]

I think it depends on whether or not the parent was a stable person who actually did the best he/she could be a good parent and role model for the child. I've found that my friends that grew up with divorced parents are in fact more willing to make their relationships/marriage work b/c they don't want to repeat the mistakes that their parents made. Just b/c a person grew up with parents that never divorced doesn't mean the marriage is nesessarily a good one. Some people stay in bad marriages for various reasons, which means a child witnessing many fights and, depending on how bad the marriage is, violence or abuse. As a result, the child raised in a bad marriage may seek out relationships with people similiar to their parent(s) b/c they know nothing else.

[allina]

My parents were 22 and 23 when they married. They are still very much in love and happily married 27 years later.

 

While I'm not married myself yet, I think my parent's marriage has had a positive impact on my dating life/relationships. I definitely think that having a positive example of what romantic love is about helps people stay out of unhealthy relationships and shows them what it means to be a bf/gf/wife/husband.

[Trialbyfire]

It depends on what you term as young or successful. For me, I define a young marriage as people who are under thirty. Also, the meaning of success is two people still "in love", after many decades together.

 

Based on the above qualifiers, my parents were a young and are currently still a very successful marriage, after 38+ years of marriage. The difficulty with growing up with such a functional marriage is that you're unwilling to settle for less.

 

My marriage dissolved, due to infidelity by my ex. Poor partner judgement on my part. I truly hope that one day, I will find someone as equally compatible, as my father is to my mother. For the interim, I'm just going to enjoy being free and single again!

 

So, overall, maybe it's a crapshoot but maybe not. I do strongly believe that it heavily impacts on the way you view relationships.