What do I say to HER??

[Custard Gannet]

Ok this is gonna be a long one but its a good one!

 

Right so, here's the background:

I used to work in a shop in the city centre amidst the high street shops.

Over time some faces became farmiliar and some predicably regular. One of the hairdressers who worked around the corner often walked by my shop in the morning on her way to work, as I waited for the boss to arrive. She was/is stunning. (Nothing major there, I know but bear with me).

 

 

About 2 years ago, I was out on a night out with a couple of college

mates in a club. The music was full on, I had a couple of drinks in me

and was strutting my stuff on the dance floor. When, of a sudden I saw this same girl out the corner of my eye, on the dance floor, dancing away. I kept dancing, kept drinking. Threw the eye over once and a while to see if she saw me/make eye contact etc.

 

When I did look over a few times, she was fending off "suitors". So I didn't approach her, she then saw me, made eye contact (ie she let me know she saw me).

Anyway, I didn't approach her, just kept drinking and dancing. Drinkin and dancin till the music really started hitting home (the drink too!!). Then suddenly, she was there in front of me, she had come over to me and was dancing away... I couldn't believe it!! "I have a chance here" I thought.

 

Then the music stops... and I for some unknown reason disappear off the floor, gone. I have tried to figure out why I bailed but considering the fact that I was quite the drunk monkey by this stage, I could probably forsee a conversation along the lines of a drunken mumble of "You're beautiful (hiccup) ... do ya know that?? (hiccup)"

 

Met up with my friends, left the club, I then went straight home to bed due to the fact that I was in work the next morning.

In work the next morning, she walks by my shop, she's not going to work this time(walking a different was, wearing casual clothes) she looks right in at me. My heart jumps. Man, she is so beautiful.

 

Over the next few weeks she passes by the shop a few times as I wait for my shop to open, she looks over, I look over... stalemate. (As you may have guessed, I am not one for chatting up women, especially on the street) I know its easy to say "Grow a pair!" or "Get over yourself and do it" but I tend to turn into a mumbing ball of flesh even when I think of her. So I didn't approach her.

 

Not long afterwards she disappears.

Gone. "Bugger" I thought, well thats that then, over. Bollocks.

Over the next year or so, she passes by my shop maybe 4 or 5 times (that I saw her), man she is so beautiful. Is she teasing me?? Either way, there's nothing I can do.

 

Time passes on and passes by, at the start of this summer I change my hours to part time due to college and then went on study leave to prepare for exams. Having not worked for 6 weeks I go back to full time hours for the summer.

 

Wednesday morning waiting for the boss on my first day back, SHE walks by going a different direction. "Is that....?" "Na, couldn't be" I thought. Thursday comes, she walks by again.... "That f**king is her". Friday, I'm ready with my "Good morning" "How are you today?" Opener, she strolls toward me, accross the road, I cant help myself grinning, I cant cover up the smile and she sees me smiling, she starts grinning and crosses the road toward me, "Sh*t, she's comming this way" I attempt to say "hello" but all the words get caught in my throat, I choke. Bollocks.

Why is it when you need to be yourself the most, yourself doesn't want to be you?

 

Anyway, a week or so later (I wouldn't see her every morning) I manage to utter the words "Hi, how are you doing?" to which she replied "Good" as she strolled by (without breaking step). Was I shot down? I thought... ah sure I'll give it another bash, so as she walked home from work a week or so later I approached her... "Howya? Have you got a minute?" I asked to which she replied simply "No". No, she doesn't have a minute. Bollocks.

 

I took this as being shot down but still I cant get her out of my head.

 

A couple of weeks later I changed jobs and no longer work near her.

Months pass and then yesterday I pay a visit into my old job, I have a couple of things to do in the city centre and I just so happen to pass her work, just so happen to peep in the door and there she is, staring out. It was the first time I walked by and looked in (until yesterday, I wasn't sure where she worked for certian.) I think I might have freaked her out, which was never my intention.

 

I want to bring this to a conclusion, either way. I think of her alot,

what ifs, what could be?? etc etc.

 

The dilemma/question: What should I do?

 

Here's what I have been thinking, feel free to critisize them (I am fully aware that my ideas have got me nowhere so far)

 

- Since she is a hairdresser, just make an appoinmtent and turn the charm on.

- Send flowers with a note.

- Forget about it and move on (tbh, i think if i did that I would never

forgive myself)

 

Any thoughts help or advice are much appreciated.

[cashley]

hmmm...well, she was pretty rude to you last time you spoke...

 

IF you MUST get her out of your head, or take this 'chance', then maybe an appointment at the place she works would be okay, but...do you even know her name?

 

Be careful you dont end up looking like a stalker!

 

Goodluck.

 

(you poor guys, women must be hard to figure out, I know that personally, i dont know myself sometimes...)

[Geishawhelk]

Well, hang on a minute... Think about it from her position....

First of all, she actually comes over to you, and dances with you and - you blow her off.

She passes by where you work tons and countless times - and all you can do initially, is stare, then grin inanely at her.

Then, when you DO get a chance to make a move, first of all, you can't think of anything to say except 'croak'! then the next time, instead of saying - "hey, we see each other so often, how about grabbing a bite to eat one lunchtime?!" all you can say, is "hi howya doin?"

 

Really! I'm sure, after all this time, she might well have been expecting something a little more imaginative!

Then, the next time, you ask - "Do you have a minute?"

And she says - "No".

 

Big hint there.

The word 'No'.

 

She had loads of time. as did you.

She had the opportunity, and took it.

You didn't.

You've had plenty of opportunities since, and didn't take them.

 

Loaded, that word 'no'.

 

Loaded with 'No.'

 

Which could roughly be translated as - Move on. There's nothing here to see, folks.'.

 

I suppose, if you're really desperate, you could go in for a cut and blow dry.

But it's an expensive way of trying to see her, and there's no guarantee you'd end up actually seeing her anyway. Not unless you asked specifically for a wash from her, or book her for a styling....

 

But 'desperate' is how I think you might come across.

 

Not so much a cut and blow-dry, but a cut off and blow out.

 

Sorry.

[Custard Gannet]

@ Geishawhelk

"countless times" & "grin inanely" are not accurate descriptions by any stretch.

 

Its not a case of being desperate, I have never had a problem getting women, just this one.

 

BTW, no self-respecting male would have a blow-dry. (even if it does precipitate your inane attempt at humor)

[Geishawhelk]

One of the hairdressers who worked around the corner often walked by my shop in the morning on her way to work, as I waited for the boss to arrive......

.....I saw this same girl out the corner of my eye, on the dance floor, dancing away. ......Then suddenly, she was there in front of me, she had come over to me and was dancing away... I couldn't believe it!! "I have a chance here" I thought.

 

......she walks by my shop, she's not going to work this time(walking a different was, wearing casual clothes) she looks right in at me.

.....Over the next few weeks she passes by the shop a few times as I wait for my shop to open, she looks over, I look over... stalemate. ......So I didn't approach her.

 

.......Over the next year or so, she passes by my shop maybe 4 or 5 times (that I saw her), ......

 

Time passes on and passes by.....Wednesday morning waiting for the boss on my first day back, SHE walks by going a different direction. ...Thursday comes, she walks by again.... ......I cant help myself grinning, I cant cover up the smile and she sees me smiling, she starts grinning and crosses the road toward me, .....I attempt to say "hello" but all the words get caught in my throat, I choke. Bollocks.

Anyway, a week or so later..... I mananage to utter the words "Hi, how are you doing?" to which she replied "Good" ......as she walked home from work a week or so later I approached her... "Howya? Have you got a minute?" I asked to which she replied simply "No". No, she doesn't have a minute.

 

...... I think of her alot,

what ifs, what could be?? etc etc.

 

The dilemma/question: What should I do?

 

......feel free to critisize them (I am fully aware that my ideas have got me nowhere so far)

 

- Since she is a hairdresser, just make an appoinmtent .....- Forget about it and move on .....

Any thoughts help or advice are much appreciated.

 

@ Geishawhelk

"countless times" & "grin inanely" are not accurate descriptions by any stretch.

So which bits above did I get wrong....?

 

Its not a case of being desperate, I have never had a problem getting women, just this one.

Why - ??

 

BTW, no self-respecting male would have a blow-dry. (even if it does precipitate your inane attempt at humor)

 

I wasn't atempting to use inane humour. What else would you make an appointment for? I work next door to a hairdressing unisex salon, and they get a lot of guys going in for a cut and blow-dry. You said, "since she is a hairdresser, just make an appointment...

 

You also said -

"......feel free to critisize them (I am fully aware that my ideas have got me nowhere so far)"

 

So I took you at your word.

 

What bit didn't you mean?

[Custard Gannet]

By using terms like "countless times" & "grin inanely" you become less critical and more insulting.

 

Why? I dunno. If I did know, I would not need to ask for advice.

 

Funnily enough, I tend to agree with you when you say "Move on. There's nothing here to see, folks." and tbh, its what I am gonna do.

Chalk it off, for what its worth.

[Mary3]

Awhh heck ! Look you are shy . You freeze up with this gorgeous babe passes you by. You just DO.

 

What to do about it ?

 

You must find a WAY to let her know you are interested.

 

Given your whole situation. I would hand her a note since you freeze up. Here is the note : " Chelsea , I just wanted you to know I have liked you since the night we danced. I am gun shy but wonder if you would give this guy a chance to take you out to dinner , If you are interested this is my number and my email. If you are not interested , I accept that. Thanks

 

Here you have let her know you have been interested since the first night but that you are shy. MOST girls who are interested will not knock you for being shy.

 

And btw this girl sent out HUGE signals from that first night that she was interested in YOU .