Is it wrong to pay a married woman for sex so she can pay her rent?

[don_guyus]

There’s this young, newly wed couple who live in the apartment below me who had some financial problems after the guy lost his job. His wife told me about it and how she needed to get some money to pay the rent. I was between girlfriends and she was looking very sweet. I offered to help her out with some money if she was willing to help me out with my physical needs. She seemed upset that I’d make this offer and said she wouldn’t ever do this, but as their situation became more desperate, she took me up on my offer. I have to say that her sexy little figure was well worth the money.

 

When I mentioned the incident to my brother, he said what I did was wrong because it was illegal (at least in our state). He said any exchange of sex for money is considered prostitution and illegal.

 

I don’t see why it would be illegal. It’s not like she was some hooker on the street corner bring down property value. It was all very discrete. No one knew about this (that was until I told my brother). She had needs which I could help out with, and like wise I had needs at that time that she definitely helped out with. After all, I thought the courts said that whatever consenting adults did in the bedroom was none of the states business. Am I missing something?

[Tony T]

Yes, you are missing something. Although most laws governing prostitution are aimed at more organized groups and lone prostitutes who offer their bodies daily as a way of making their living, the statutes define the offense as anytime money or other valuable consideration is offered to any person in return for sex...no matter what the circumstances. Had the woman been an undercover police officer, you would have been arrested.

 

I am sorry I read the post because I feel so sorry for this woman who obviously had to lose her dignity and humanity for you to get your rocks off in return for her rent. I personallly would have written her a check for her rent, groceries and whatever else her family needed and told her to keep her clothes on. I am not able to bring myself to have sex with a person who is desperate and in dire need. The thought of doing that sickens me.

 

Even though you were breaking the law, I think that's a lot more forgiveable than bringing another human being to her knees and putting her through what was probably the most disgraceful and horrifying experience of her life. I'm sure that short time did more psychological damage than any other event in her lifetime. Here you are wondering if you did something illegal and she's facing years of having to live with such an indignity.

 

What happened to the days when people were decent and helped each other out without having to ruin a person's life as payback?

 

By the way, I went to the member area and clicked on your website and noticed a picture of your very beautiful girlfriend, Maki. She has to be the most unfortunate person in the world not knowing what you're really all about. Your exes are beautiful as well. Please ask your girlfriend what she thinks about what you did and if she thinks it's prostitution. I dare you! Why is it that I'm not surprised that you would publish raunchy pictures of girls you claim are your ex girlfriends on your personal website?

[dalmatianbaby]

You are a filthy opportunist!! How could you possibly think it is okay to put another living soul through something like that. "I'll help you if you get me off." That's not help.

 

Dalmatianbaby

[my_mother's_daughter]

Well said Tony. Just about sums it up.

 

don_guyus: you actually make me feel sick. That poor woman.

[Jamie31]

First of all, I think it is really sad that you would post naked pictures of your girlfriends on the internet. That is pretty low. Do they know you did this? I would kill somebody for doing that to me!!

 

And paying a girl for sex is just wrong. Especially when she is in such a desperate need. That's awful! I am appaled.

[PurpleAngel]

If you want to be such the Good Samaritan why not just help her out and give her the money instead of belittling her to that point that she needs to sleep with you! THAT’S OFF!

 

I am sorry but that story just makes me SICK! How awful to take advantage of someone who is vulnerable and in need!

 

To answer your questions YES IT IS WRONG to pay a married woman for sex so she can pay her rent? But for me it’s not a legal thing but rather a humane and moral thing.

 

 

don_guyus: Am I missing something?

 

Oh boy are you missing something!! This is not about two peoples needs being met, it’s about HER survival and YOUR needs being met!

 

WHAT A COWARDLY ACT!

 

I feel quite sorry for you that the only way you can get people to........ No I had better stop there cos I am sure that this post would get edited if I said what I really thought!

[SudieJD]

Was Terrible! This woman will remember this for the rest of her life! Newly wed? Having a hard time? All most all newly weds have difficult times and you made them worse!

 

Why didn't you just give her the money as a loan to help out? You try to make yourself sound like a good Samaritan by doing this, no way! Your slime!

 

Sudie

[EnigmaXOXO]

Pathetic...

 

Two ex-girlfriends

Upon hearing that I had some photos of my ex-girlfriends with no cloths on,

some friends of mine who new these girls seemed very interested in seeing them.

As a result, I posted them for all to see.

Just click on their name to see more of them.

 

I wonder if THIS is legal?

[HokeyReligions]

LOL! You are too late dude, Jerry Springer already ran this episode!

 

I think it is interesting that so many of the responses were to feel sorry for this woman. I'll pretend this is a real post and say that If someone is so down and out that they would have sex for money then they deserve what they get. The person I would feel bad for is her new husband. You need to grow up and behave like a decent human being -- look up decency and honor in the dictionary. Look up morals and respect too while you are at it.

[Tony T]

YOU WRITE: "If someone is so down and out that they would have sex for money then they deserve what they get."

 

Well, Hokey, unfortunately this happens a lot. The circumstances vary but there are a lot of women whose only possibility of getting money is via selling their body. Some have no valid birth certificate (for any one of a dozen reasons) or otherwise have no legal way of getting valid employment or government assistance. I know of one 25 year old woman in Dallas who was born in Mexico and taken by American parents. She was abused as a child, was not well educated as a consequence, is a very sweet lady but has no birth certificate and therefore cannot get a job or assistance for her own child, nearing 4 years of age. She gets by doing a bit of artwork and getting help from churches and other charities. There are other women out there who are so immobilized by depression and other medical problems they can hardly get out of bed to support themselves. Life can be very tough for some people through no fault of their own.

 

I don't think a woman in dire straights deserves what they get for sleeping with someone in many cases. However, I think any man who takes advantage of a woman in these circumstances deserves to rot in hell forever.

[HokeyReligions]

I understand what you are saying Tony, and maybe I should have worded my response a little differently. The original post said this woman was newly married. Well, she has a husband to share this burden with and she's not homeless - in the situation described I say that person gets what she deserves for her choice. Hopefully its not a life-threatening illness or a baby.

 

I think selling oneself for sex is one of the most disgusting things to do. I feel very strongly about begging, but I would rather beg for money then have sex for it. I happen to think that is beyond degrading, but I can't think of anyting bad enough to call it. Not everyone feels the same way as I do, and I do understand that people make a choice what to do with their bodies. I still think that if someone sells their body for sex, they deserve what they get. Hopefully they use a condem, but a condem doesn't sheild against lack of self-respect, or self-worth.

 

Its so sad that there really are people who don't know it's wrong or don't know why it's wrong.

[moimeme]

I think selling oneself for sex is one of the most disgusting things to do

they deserve what they get

 

But that's just you. There are people in this world who love to exhibit their bodies and to have sex. The world is full of different folks. I'm not saying that every prostitute is fulfilled in her job - then again who is? However, as Tony rightly points out, some people just can't figure anything else out and others make the choice and just because it's something you would never do does not mean that people deserve some sort of karmic retribution for doing it.

 

There's a big difference between 'I don't like what you do' and 'You are bad and wrong and should fry in hell for what you do'. Funnily enough, JC himself didn't seem it beneath him to hang out with ladies of the night and I don't recall one passage in which he condemned them to miserable fates. Something about love, forgiveness, and not judging as I recall.

[Tony T]

"Something about love, forgiveness, and not judging as I recall."

 

Yeah, I think Jesus said something like "Let he who is without stones cast the first sin."

[quankanne]

and let's not forget, he ran the money-changers out of the temple, too!

[HokeyReligions]

Originally posted by moimeme

But that's just you. There are people in this world who love to exhibit their bodies and to have sex. The world is full of different folks. I'm not saying that every prostitute is fulfilled in her job - then again who is? However, as Tony rightly points out, some people just can't figure anything else out and others make the choice and just because it's something you would never do does not mean that people deserve some sort of karmic retribution for doing it.

?? You are right - it IS me--- or rather my opinion. And I am still of the opinion that a person making a choice to sell their body for sex, deserves what they get. The same as any decision - or to put it in biblical terms "reap what ye sow"

 

There's a big difference between 'I don't like what you do' and 'You are bad and wrong and should fry in hell for what you do'. Funnily enough, JC himself didn't seem it beneath him to hang out with ladies of the night and I don't recall one passage in which he condemned them to miserable fates. Something about love, forgiveness, and not judging as I recall.

I never said anything about frying in hell. I DO think that prostitution is disgusting, that is my opinion. Can I understand some of the choice - sure I can intellectually understang the reasoning behind some of it - but I still think it's horrible.

 

This was my original statement: Not everyone feels the same way as I do, and I do understand that people make a choice what to do with their bodies. I still think that if someone sells their body for sex, they deserve what they get. Hopefully they use a condem, but a condem doesn't sheild against lack of self-respect, or self-worth. ~Hokey

 

I'm not sure how this translates to me condemning someone or calling someone wrong. It certainly is wrong for ME, and I see prostitution, under any circumstance, as a shout as if to say "hey! look at me - I have no self-respect!" and any respect I might have for a person on an individual basis, would likely be lessened if I knew they were a practicing prostitute when they know they don't have to be. I've worked at enough shelters and charities to know that help is available and that the majority of women (& some men) that I've seen, worked with, or helped process through the system, are trying to escape from prostitution and all of them have said they are tyring to "better" themselves so that they don't have to be prostitutes anymore. I have a lot of respect for that.

 

Besides, I'm agnostic so the christian references don't mean much to me.

[sarah12]

Clatan:

 

..and you thought it was the financial situation that drove women away from you..

 

I just read your thread about being worried that women are turned off by your financial situation, and now I read this and I want to throw up.

 

Unbelievable.

 

 

Moderator's Note: clatan's repulsive post, which immediately preceeded this one, was deleted.

[yogi-mon]

But I sincerely believe that what both of you did is COMPLETELY wrong.

Perhaps even more so SHE is more wrong (If there is such a thing..)

 

You, so low to take advantage of a situation like that, and even propose

such a distasteful solution,

 

and Her, for taking you up on it.

I dont care what ANYONE says, there is NO reason a married woman should

ever EVER have to prostitute herself. Personally, in some demented, sick way

I really believe that this was her own sick way of justifying an affair in her mind.

[Duke]

This has got to be one of the craziest posts I've ever read.

 

I think you should be ashamed of yourself for paying her for sex. No matter what the reason it was completely immoral. I believe I read it was your idea which pretty much makes you a (deleted).

 

The woman may or may not be a victim here and nobody can really know for sure. Did she want an affair and just use the money as an excuse, was she degraded because her back was to the wall and needed to prostitute herself to make ends meat? Theres no way to know for sure but you really should have steered clear of the situation d00d.

[lostforwords]

my heart goes to the woman that had to actually suffer going thru what she did with you.... not only did you take advantage of someone who probably felt ashamed and embarrassed to talk to you about it..... but now she hes to live with herself and replay that most likely disgusting image of you sweating on top of her in her mind....

[yogi-mon]

its just as much her fault for prostituting herself.

SHES MARRIED

[lostforwords]

yeh yeh yogi..... blah blah blah married woman..... ok now that we're over that.... the guy is still disgusting for taking advantage of her..... im hoping she gets herself a job so she doesnt have to endure this guy again.... or better yet her husband get a job...... its bad enough not being able to support yourself but let alone another person.... so let me ask you something yogi... when you paid those prostitutes for sex...... did you ever wonder if they had to make rent????????? if they were a mother or a wife? perhaps maybe their husband was their pimp? did you know any of this?

[yogi-mon]

I only did it once, and I'll NEVER do it again.

 

I'm sure she had might have had problems.

I doubt she was married.

 

Regardless - SHE MARRIED.

 

I cant believe you downplay that. O she did it for the money.. BULL ****.

She did it cause she wanted to. Money is a lame excuse.

[lostforwords]

HE is an opportunistic...... hes a PREDATOR......... yes what she did was wrong..... but i feel awful for her to have had to go through what she did..... he took advantage of a persons wellbeing/needs and he used it for his advantages..... i feel he is more in the wrong.... MY opinion of course.....

[clatan]

She could always have said... "no thanks."

 

I'd agree with Hokey. The only real vicitm is (possibly) her husband.

Sure, she may have been hard up for money but come on. I don't know where she lives and her exact work status but this is America. There are always jobs in the classifieds. It may not pay a lot and it may be a really crappy job, but if it bothered her to whore herself out, not to mention cheat on her husband, I would think she could have tried to find something in the want ads. Besides, there's welfare and a host of other alternatives.

 

He mentioned that she was really attractive with a nice body. Really attractive women rarely are left with no options as far as employment in this society, whether it be "adult-related" or not. Even if it was adult-related, she could probably make even more money as a topless dancer. Sure, it may be degrading too, but at least you don't have to have sex with anyone. If she's willing to have sex for money it shouldn't bother her to dance naked in front of a few guys.

[Goatsbreath]

I think she was wrong. She is not a victim. She made a choice outside her marriage to help thier financial situation but shouldn't the husband have a say in this. Shouldn't they have sat down and said.... look, we need to make ends meet somehow and that may mean getting a second job, borrowing money for a short time, ect. Either way it should of been a joint effort and descion process. Not the wife waking up one day and saying, you know- theres a place I know where I can go sell my body and ......................

 

Im sure if you asked her husband........he would prefer to find a second job rather then have his wife sleeping around on him